Pre-show notes:

- If you love The Rock and think he’s the best wrestler of all time, be sure to leave us a comment. That should cover my commenting hype-beg for the week and entitle every living human who isn’t me or Billy Jack Haynes to post something.

- An important thing to remember while reading this report is that I had a weekend literally full of awesome wrestling. I spent Friday night and Saturday and Sunday mornings at Wizard World Austin loitering around Darin Childs’ table in the 1600 aisle, commissioning professional art from my favorite wrestler in the world. Saturday night I went to Anarchy Championship Wrestling’s Lone Star Classic, which featured Portia Perez winning their heavyweight title only to lose it an hour later. ACH ended up with it, which was the second happiest thing that could happen. Also, the Nasty Boys were there. Sunday was CHIKARA’s High Noon iPPV. I was too worn out by then to cover it effectively, but it was one of the best shows of the year and Peck/Cabana II was simultaneously the best and worst match in history. So then Monday night comes along, and it’s three hours of Raw getting Rocked. My brain may not be processing this correctly.

- Oh, and before I forget, after the jump you can see four of my five (or six) favorite WWE Superstars appearing in one segment together on Friday’s Smackdown. Why am I not Besting and Worsting this show instead?

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Photo credit: WWE.com

Oh hi mark.

- For those of you who only show up to read Best and Worst (shame on you), I’m back from my nearly week-long vacation in sunny southern California for a mix of Dodgers baseball, Brady Bunch house visits and mark photos with SoCal Jack Skellington and have returned to my post as the Raw reviewer who is extremely positive about everything but only likes Alberto Del Rio. Before I start, I want to give another thank you to Andrew Johnson for filling in on The Best And Worst Of WWE Night Of Champions and to Diego “the only Dr. Cube that matters” McCafferty for The Guest And Worst Of Raw 9/19. They did a fantastic job filling in, and if you haven’t read those recaps yet, please do so.

- Like I said, this is my first column back in two weeks, so I am going to absolutely badger you to f’ing death for comments, Facebook shares, Twitter retweets, Google Plus plus-ones, Friendster wall posts (does Friendster have a wall? I can’t remember), Xanga rants and Diaryland entries in the support of Best and Worst of Raw. They are appreciated, and if I don’t get enough of them I’m turning With Leather into an indecipherable mass of misdirecting Stephanie McMahon Nude Click Here links and Free iPod announcements.

- In case you need to be bribed, and because last week nobody here liked her enough to include a gratuitous picture, here is Smackdown’s A.J. doing a split.

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Links

6 Sickeningly Exploitative 911 Specials - To their credit, it’s got to be pretty hard to make a non-exploitative 911 special. The only alternative to talking about death and tragedy and property damage is the “America bounced back!” thing, which is 1) not true 2) exploitative in a completely different direction. [Warming Glow]

The Best and Worst of WWE Super Smackdown Live 8/30 - Linking myself here to show solidarity toward UPROXX sites that cover wrestling. And because that Miracleman reference ended up reading pretty well. [With Leather]

Why Vince McMahon Needs to Buy Impact Wrestling for His Own Survival - When he says “major companies” I guess he doesn’t include Japan or anything pre-1985, but it’s a point worth making, and any company that employs Jeff Hardy should be bought out and outsourced. [Smoking Section]

New X-Men Featurette Examines Jennifer Lawrence’s Naked Boob Painting - I like when Jennifer Lawrence gets movies instead of other people. She’s got to be the least attainable attainable girl ever. [Film Drunk]

Funny, Sexy, and Awesome Cosplay of the Week - Decent looking girls who cosplay are the most hilarious big fish in a small pond ever, and never as good as a Pikachu dog. [Gamma Squad]

Meme Watch: Successful Black Man Is Borderline Offensive, But Hilarious - I really would’ve done a terrible job if I’d stayed an UPROXX beat guy. Every time I get to a meme I’d just sit and stare at it until it got old. People who do these are working on a different plane. [UPROXX]

Ghostbusters 3 Sounds Kinda Terrible - Does it feature an old man in a painting who wants to be reborn as a baby in a city with Willy Wonka bubblegum sewers? No? Then yeah, it sounds kinda terrible. [Gamma Squad]

The 10 Biggest Flops of Summer - I’ve come to the realization that I have no idea what constitutes a flop. If a movie cost 100 million and makes 120, isn’t that still a 20 million dollar profit? You could make my crummy independent effort like 40 times with that money. [Film Drunk]

Freida Pinto Isn’t Bankable in India - And speaking of unattainable girls, Freida Pinto (and her name, meaning “fried beans”) was a case of “oh man, whatever happened to her” while Slumdog was still in theaters. Calling her a “bankable A-list Hollywood star” is pushing it. Woody Allen thinking you’re hot doesn’t make you A-list. [FARK]

6 Sexiest Moments in Recent Advertising History - Number one better be Flo from Progressive or I swear to God [The Smoking Jacket]

12 Scary (and Not-So-Scary) Outer Space Thrillers - Event Horizon for the win. It’s hilarious that I’m such a film snob, and the two movies I’ve seen in the theater most are Event Horizon and f**king Blade. I was pretty bored during that time period. [Moviefone]

In Celebration of Helen Mirren: 20 Other Older Babes Who’ve Still Got It - “Babes” always makes me feel weird (especially when you say it as “behbs”), but we need more foxy older actresses than Helen Mirren. Monica Bellucci is going to be there in a few years, but we need to speed up the Hollywood aging process. Megan Fox is going to look like an absolute monster when she’s 60. [Pajiba]

A few questions before we start.

- Do you know the enemy? You know your enemy?

- Are you familiar with the Best And Worst Of Raw? This is going to work just like that, only for the super special live edition of Smackdown. I don’t normally do these recaps for Smackdown because 1) I am a cool guy in real life who is probably busy on Friday nights and 2) With Leather doesn’t update on the weekends, and if I put it up on Saturday afternoon it will get four hits, and three of those will be from Upstate Underdog. If you like this write-up and share it around and leave me a comment, I’ll try to make a point to work it out somehow.

- If you haven’t read yesterday’s column, please do so before clicking through.

Enjoy our inaugural edition of The Best and Worst of Smackdown by clicking through, and stay tuned for our loosely-related slideshow, The 16 Most Outrabulous Teddy Long Jackets.

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A few notes before the process begins anew:

- I’ve spent the last few days in rural Tennessee visiting my parents and going to Minor League Baseball games to have my picture taken with wandering miscellanea, so I’ve been a little out of the loop and apologize for any errant e-mail responses or the slight shortness of this week’s report.

- In case you were wondering, yes, tomorrow’s With Leather updates will feature the Best And Worst Of Super Smackdown, because for once I’ll get to write about the show on a Wednesday. edit: Here’s the Best and Worst of Smackdown, in case you missed it (or didn’t know it existed).

- If you read this week’s show report, LEAVE A COMMENT! I don’t want to have to get Jerry at UPROXX to create huge DROP A COMMENT graphics to put at the bottom of every page. Your voice is appreciated, and eventually I’m gonna get these things up to 200 comments on the reg. Also, click that little “like” button and share this jazz with your Facebook friends. Also, bake and mail me vegan cookies.

I will try to get through this report without namedropping my beautiful In Real Life girlfriend. I know how much that bothers you! Please enjoy this week’s Best and Worst of Raw, after the jump.

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