I OFFICIALLY SAY THE “R” WORD

… retarded?

RETIREMENT – THERE I SAID IT

ANTHONY “SPICE” ADAMS – NFL FREE AGENT

And so begins the epic retirement announcement video from nine-year NFL veteran a defensive tackle Anthony Adams. If every pro athlete retired like this, the world would be a happier place. Highlights include an announcement dinner at a White Castle, an incredible shirt that links exercise to bacon, and that adorable little girl being interviewed. Oh, and a well-timed job application.

If you only watch one video of an ex-football player being depressed in a fast food restaurant today, make it this one.

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I feel bad that we started the day off with domestic violence and love gone wrong, so I thought maybe now was the time to share a story that tugs on the heart strings a little. The constricted, clogged strings of an enlarged heart. Dale Bemis was one of 13 super lucky people recently inducted into the White Castle Cravers Hall of Fame, leading the world to collectively wonder – “Why the eff does White Castle have a Hall of Fame?” Nevertheless, there is one and Pete Rose again has hope.

Dale earned the honor after he submitted an essay about the final moments he shared with his dying father, as they ate White Castle burgers with extra pickles, and how his wife once randomly ordered burgers with extra pickles while they were dating, telling Dale that it was a sign from his dad to marry her. Or she’s actually his estranged sister. For the sake of romance, let’s hope not.

I’ll take a Crave Case, hold the shortened life expectancy, Chicago Sun-Times:

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