With a hat-tip to our friends at Bob’s comes my new favorite follow-up story.

Remember last week when we shared with you the video of a ring girl In The Style Of Liz Vicious who didn’t realize that “this guy knocked out on the floor with people checking on him” meant the fight was over, so she sauntered around with a big Round 2 sign like a goon?

THE STORY HAS A PREQUEL.

No, we’re not making this up.

Prior to the incident involving walking by a fallen fighter with a round 2 sign, the very same inattentive round card girl came out holding a round 4 sign for a 3 round fight. The fight was over and headed to the judges scorecards, but she was ready for round 4.

Video is below. Keep shining, you crazy, stupid diamond.

Read the rest of this entry »

Sometime last year I made a joke about people who follow Arianny Celeste on Twitter, and how she couldn’t possibly have anything interesting to say. I was rightfully called out for it. Just because her job is to hold a piece of cardboard and walk 10 feet (like a homeless person, or that guy in a gorilla costume who stands on the side of the road outside of a Party City) doesn’t mean she’s not a person, capable of the same reason and insights as a prize-winning physicist, or whatever. I’ve tried to avoid jumping to similar, ignorant conclusions.

That said, this ring girl is dumber than a bag of f**king dog food. See that big ROUND 2 sign she’s holding? Yeah, to show that to the crowd she had to walk past a knocked out guy sprawled out on the floor with a bunch of people attending to him.

Here’s the recap, from the hilariously expository YouTube description:

An unattentive round card girl walks by an unconscious fighter being tended to by doctors with a sign indicating the start of round two….except, it’s not the start of round two. The fighter is unconscious because he got knocked out and the fight is over. The victorious fighter tells her of her erroneous ways.

Video is below. It’s worth it for her “lol like I’m supposed to know how this work” shrug when she finds out what’s up.

Read the rest of this entry »

"Nope."

Wrestling is not a sport. No, I’m not talking about pro wrestling (for once). I’m talking about wrestling wrestling.

Following the removal of baseball from the Olympics in a quest to get Brandon to stop watching it completely, International Olympic Committee leaders are planning to drop amateur wrestling from the 2020 Olympics. You know, the sport that has been part of the games since 1896 and kinda-sorta represents the entire “man vs. man” thing the Olympics (and sports in general) are going for.

Oddly, the angle the Los Angeles Times write-up of the story takes is that modern pentathlon is being removed, and how nobody gives a shit about modern pentathlon, and what modern pentathlon is. They just lump wrestling in with table tennis and badminton somewhere in the middle.

The IOC will also review preparations for the Winter Olympics in Sochi, Russia — less than a year away — and the 2016 Summer Games in Rio de Janeiro.

The sports expected to be on the hot seat for removal besides modern pentathlon: Taekwondo, wrestling, badminton and table tennis.

The report analyzes more than three dozen criteria, including television ratings, ticket sales, anti-doping policy and global participation and popularity.

… keeping in mind that synchronized swimming, handball, race walk, shooting and “Nordic Combined” will all still happen at their appropriate Olympics, just not wrestling or baseball. Pretty soon the Olympics is just going to be gymnasts posing on the sidelines of a soccer game, holding up a big sign that says PLEASE LIKE SOCCER, BECAUSE OLYMPICS.

But hey, golf is joining the Olympics in 2016. That’s exciting and athletic, right?

Enter the world of BEERCUP DRUNKEN FOOTBALL. At least, I think that’s what it’s supposed to be. It’s an Icelandic hybrid of soccer and mixed martial arts. The video was uploaded with the title “bearcup,” and I’ve listened to enough Bjork songs to put it together.

I’ll let you try to figure out what’s going on. It’s over three minutes of Icelandic dudes just whaling on each other for no reason, seemingly independent of any kind of soccer they’re playing. People get slapped, tripped, thrown, punched in the stomach and jumped from behind without any repercussions or points or anything, and the goalies are barely trying. Seriously, the goalies just stand there and kinda put their leg out whenever anybody tries to score. The f**k is going on with this game? The entire thing is set to the spectacularly NSFW sounds of Dope’s ‘Die Motherf**ker,’ so that should put it into perspective for you.

My theory is that a bunch of guys in Iceland wanted to have a gang rumble (Outsiders style) but Icelandic police (or whoever) were too strict and wouldn’t let it happen, so they came up with this weird, hyper-violent version of Calvinball to beat the ass out of each other as much as they wanted. Secondary theory: Iceland is weird, and some guys just really want to hit each other.

[h/t to Total Pro Sports]

I don’t know why this exists, but it’s a clip of a Belgian basketball player deciding to shoot on his own goal over and over, missing every single shot until somebody runs over and stops him. It’s like a surrealist painting in basketball clip form, and for the record, this is exactly what I look like when making lay-ups on any goal. (via Cosby Sweaters)

- Follow us on Twitter @withleather
- Follow me personally @MrBrandonStroud and Burnsy @MayorBurnsy
- Like us on Facebook.

Links

A Handy Guide To Twitter Stalking Our Favorite People On Our Favorite Shows |Warming Glow|

The UPROXX 20: Eric Idle |UPROXX|

It’s Time to Demand Matthew McConaughey’s Oscar |Film Drunk|

Good News, Funny Guys: Formula 1 Heiress Tamara Ecclestone Is Single |With Leather|

The Best Cosplay You’ll See Today |Gamma Squad|

10 Public Enemy Songs Everyone Should Know |Smoking Section|

Eric Berry Has Crippling Horse Phobia |Kissing Suzy Kolber|

Read the rest of this entry »