The key words here are “and other devices”.

Houston Astros’ outfielder Jordan Schafer has been arrested in Florida and charged with felony possession of marijuana.

According to an arrest report from the Hillsborough County Sheriff’s office, Schafer was arrested early Tuesday morning in Tampa after a traffic stop and was released on a $2,000 cash bond. It wasn’t clear if he had an attorney.

A police report says that black Land Rover driven by Schafer with its windows open pulled up next to a police car. Police say officers noticed a strong marijuana smell and saw Schafer smoking a marijuana cigarette.

Baseball players are doing drugs! Here at The Dugout we try to approach each breaking news bit about pro athlete substance abuse with dignity and respect, especially if we’ve never heard of the player, and pending that player not being Manny Ramirez or someone whose wife-beating bullsh*t makes us too sad for jokes. I don’t even think Jordan Schafer’s parents know who Houston Astros outfielder Jordan Schafer is, so here’s a rundown of exactly what happened when he was arrested. And yes, the part about him having weed peanut butter cups is real.

Read the rest of this entry »

Cuttino Mobley announced his retirement in December of 2008, citing hypertrophic cardiomyopathy — a disease that causes the heart muscle to thicken, making it more difficult to pump blood — as the reason for ending his 11 year NBA career. But a debilitating heart disease won’t keep Cuttino from living out his lifelong dreams. He is dating (and presumably having sex with), former Sex in the City star Kim Cattrall *shudder*, and is hard at work trying to open the medicinal marijuana dispensary he’s always wanted.

“I want to help people,” [Mobley] said.

It’s also the way he was raised, his version of spirituality, the sense that you help others when you can. So he helps fund an AAU team in Philadelphia. He built a basketball court in Africa. He helps out his old high school. He has a foundation in Philadelphia that helps single mothers and homeless kids.

One of the things he wants to do now is start a wellness center in Warwick, one that will be allowed to dispense medical marijuana. He says he got interested in the field of wellness both through his own medical condition and those of other people close to him, and adds that the health field is one of the fastest growing in the country.–Providence Journal

That second paragraph was so sweet, it gave me diabetes. If it did, I guess I would be eligible for medicinal marijuana in Rhode Island. I wonder who those “people close to him” are. It’s not like NBA players smoke weed. Except Zach Randolph, Josh Howard, Joakim Noah, the 2005 version of Stephon Marbury, Mario Chalmers, Allen Iverson, Damon Stoudamire, Rasheed Wallace, Chris Webber, Birdman Andersen, and Michael Beasley, of course.

Washington is one of the many states debating the passing of medical marijuana laws, and although recreational use is still illegal, two Washington State football players were undeterred from having 38 plants growing in their basement. You read that right. 38 plants. To get a little context for those who say ‘up with hope, down with dope’ or ‘hugs, not drugs,’ that’s about 38 more plants than you would ever need growing in your basement at any time.

Pullman police arrested redshirt freshman backup linebacker Jamal Atofau and redshirt freshman Andre Barrington, who is academically ineligible this semester, after finding 38 marijuana plants growing in a house they rented with two other men.

Pullman police spokesman Cmdr. Chris Tennant said that while executing an unrelated search warrant, they discovered the marijuana plants growing in a basement room. Later the cops found manufacturing equipment and paraphernalia. All four residents of the house, including the two football players, were arrested. –Sports by Brooks

Although it’s possible that the players had nothing to do with the plants growing in their basement, logic dictates that they probably knew exactly what was going on. If your mom could smell that joint you smoked in your bathroom with the fan on, chances are these guys could “smell the refer from a mile away” as Gucci Mane so eloquently put it.

Michael Beasley has had a very difficult time adjusting to life in the NBA. Thankfully for him, there are terrible GMs like David Kahn who are confident in their abilities to develop potential. Two second round draft picks turned the Miami Heat’s trash into David Kahn’s treasure earlier this summer, and our favorite GM has an idea of how to get the former NCAA POY back on the right track. He’s getting the munchies just thinking about it.

Timberwolves general manager David Kahn told ESPN 1500 Twin Cities that the 6-10 forward struggled because he “smoked too much marijuana.”

Kahn said Beasley told him “he’s not smoking anymore, and I told him that I would trust him as long as that was the case… he has developed a really good support system around him this past season in Miami. He’s hired people to help him grow up. He is growing up — he’s not grown up. He’s 21 … ”
–USA Today

Good luck with that, Dave. There’s a lot to do in Miami, and Michael still just wanted to get high. You think there’s going to be anything to keep him occupied during a Minnesota winter? In David’s defense, Beasley hasn’t been bad enough to be considered a bust. He’s put up pretty good numbers throughout his career, and Minnesota only had to give up two second round picks to get him. It’s probably a good idea for Kahn to trade draft picks, considering he’ll just waste them anyway.

It’s pretty common knowledge that athletes ‘partake’ from time to time, so it should come as a surprise to no one that pictures of Joakim Noah shopping for a bong have been released.

These photos were taken in March, on Chicago’s North Side (on a block known affectionately as “Head Shop Row”). At the time, Noah was recovering from plantar fasciitis, an ailment that would sideline him for nearly a month.

The Bulls, caught off guard when we alerted them to the photos, gave us an official “no comment.” –Deadspin

Of course Joakim Noah is a stoner. I mean, just look at him. You have to smoke weed if you have hair like that. My problem is deciding if I’d rather hang out with Hot Bong Girl or Stoned Birthday Dog. Too bad it’s a choice I’ll never have to make. Pictures of Joakim are featured over at Deadspin, and after the jump. Read the rest of this entry »

At least I still have this sweet beard

A Springfield police officer patrolling the Gateway area on Monday cited Masoli, 21, on charges of possessing less than 1 ounce of pot, driving with a suspended license and failure to stop at a driveway or sidewalk. All three charges are noncriminal violations that carry fines upon conviction.

But because Masoli is already on probation as a result of a previous criminal conviction, it’s possible that his Springfield marijuana case could result in additional punishment.

Masoli was placed on one year of probation in March after he pleaded guilty in Lane County Circuit Court to burglarizing the Sigma Alpha Epsilon fraternity house west of the UO campus. –The Register Guard

It’s a shame, really. Masoli, who had only two seasons at Oregon after being recruited out of Junior College, is a seriously talented football player who let his stupidity get the best of him. Which is a surprise, because this type of behavior from a football player is unheard of. I would have never expected that a football player would make such an awful decision after being forgiven for a past mistake. And I would have never expected drug use from an athlete of his prominence. Especially not from someone who’s expected to be a role model for children. Despite Masoli’s talent, it’s needless to say that the team is better off without him. The last thing the Oregon football team needs is a negative influence to corrupt their players. They’re such upstanding young men. Highlights from Masoli’s short-lived Oregon career after the jump. Read the rest of this entry »