When will Alfred Morris have his own sandwich likeness?

On one hand, the Washington Redskins have two losses because they’ve given up 123 points through four games, which is second worst in the NFC to 0-4 New Orleans’ 130 points. But on the other, more positive and relevant hand, the Redskins have scored 123 points, which is second best in the NFC to 4-0 Atlanta’s 124 points. Washington has two rookies to thank for that offensive success, and the one who gets all of the attention is Robert Griffin III, because he’s awesome and was drafted second overall for being awesome.

Of course, as we’ve previously discussed, RG3 was prematurely granted meme status after Washington’s Week 1 win over the Saints with “Griffining”, which is the act of sitting on one’s behind with both arms in the air. Two losses in row, though, sort of put the kibosh on that trend, as people realized that all the posing in the world can’t stop a defense from giving up 150 yards to Danny Amendola. But Griffining returned briefly on Sunday, as RG3 struck his famous pose… because a fan asked him to.

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The Washington Redskins are currently 1-0 after a huge 40-32 Week 1 victory over the New Orleans Saints, and naturally the buzz of that win revolved around how great rookie quarterback Robert Griffin III played. RG3, as he’s known in science fiction films to fans, threw for 320 yards and 2 TDs in his first regular season NFL game, so naturally Skins fans are excited about his future. It also helps that he gets to play the St. Louis Rams this week, and everyone assumes that’ll be a much easier game for him (even though the Rams made Matt Stafford look like he played for the Rams).

Again, the guy has played one regular season game, and while I know that Skins fans are relieved that they finally have a potentially good QB and not a Grossman or Campbell, we shouldn’t anoint him the Chosen One just yet. But that would be a rational point of view, and sports fans are never rational. That’s how a meme like Griffining is born.

Coined by The Burgundy Blog, Griffining is the new planking/owling/Batmaning/Tebowing, and I have a feeling that even if the Redskins go 1-15 this season and Griffin throws no more TDs and 50 interceptions, the fans will keep doing it, because sports fans are insane. While there’s already a movement to stop this fad growing on Twitter, it won’t matter. The resistance to Griffining is futile.

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The Redskins beat the Saints 40-32 on Sunday, and in NFL fan terms that means “the Redskins are going to have a great season and win the Superbowl”, so here’s the first of what I assume will be an absolute deluge of RG3 rap tributes. This one is from “Money M.I.C.” and features a burning Troy Aikman jersey. Because, you know, that’s timely. (via Outside The Boxscore)

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Links

The 10 Greatest Rapper/Athlete Pairings On ‘NFL Jams’ |UPROXX|

‘Community’ Will Parody ‘The Hunger Games’ In Its Season Premiere |Warming Glow|

This Week in Posters & Stills: Hobbits and Horror |Film Drunk|

Ryan Lochte Will Ruin, I Mean, Guest Star On ’30 Rock’ |With Leather|

News To Make You Feel Old: ‘Batman: The Animated Series’ Turns Twenty |Gamma Squad|

Peyton Manning’s Jersey Considered Gang-Related, Banned In Colorado School District |Smoking Section|

KSK Interview: Curt Menefee |Kissing Suzy Kolber|

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In a world where Kris Humphries can get $24 million for being a basketball player people have heard of, it only makes sense that second overall selection in the NFL draft and living Powerade commercial Robert Griffin III would get paid. That happened this morning, as RG3 showed up in an Instagram signing his contract with the Washington Redskins.

From The Washington Post:

Griffin tweeted Wednesday morning, “Well people…. It’s Time to go to Work!!! off the unemployment line and oh yeah HTTR!!!!”

Under the terms of the sport’s rookie pay system, Griffin’s deal is for four years and contains a fifth-year option. It is expected to be worth about $21 million and to be fully guaranteed, with a signing bonus of $14 million.

14 million (with another 21 coming) is a pretty sweet deal for signing your name, and a completely appropriate next step in life for a guy talented and fortunate enough to turn even his incompletions into magic:

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The Washington Redskins were 5-11 last year. This comes as no surprise, because, give or take a field goal or two, the Redskins are always 5-11. In an attempt to turn things around, last week the team packaged a total of three first-round picks (and one second-rounder) to go after Baylor quarterback Robert Griffin III with the second overall pick in the draft. After trading away all those picks, however, the NFL slapped them down for “unfairly” front-loading contracts during the uncapped 2010 season, and lowered their cap figure by $36 million. So, in summary, in the past week, the Redskins have lost a substantial amount of both draft picks and money. A sensible owner would process this information and wade carefully into free agency, trying to maximize the limited resources he has left. The Redskins, on the other hand, have Dan Snyder, who promptly signed wide receivers Pierre Garcon and Josh Morgan.

Garcon’s deal is a blockbuster: five years for $42.5 million with $20.5 million guaranteed, including an $11 million signing bonus.

Morgan agreed to a contract worth $12 million over the first two years, with $7.5 million guaranteed. His full contract is for five years, but the final three can be voided. [ESPN]

When reached for comment about committing $28 million to two wide receivers in the face of his team’s financial and personnel limitations, Dan Snyder had this response:

Dan Snyder ain’t care.

As has been extensively documented, the 2010 NFL season was played without a salary cap because the owners chose to opt out of the collective bargaining agreement that was in place at the time. During this uncapped year, the Washington Redskins and Dallas Cowboys spent extra money frontloading contracts so the biggest hit would occur immediately, and not be spread out over the course of the contract (presumably when a new cap would be in place). Because this made a lot of sense, the NFL is punishing them for it by lowering the Cowboys’ cap number by $10 million, and the Redskins’ by $36 million.

“The Management Council Executive Committee determined that the contract practices of a small number of clubs during the 2010 league year created an unacceptable risk to future competitive balance, particularly in light of the relatively modest salary cap growth projected for the new agreement’s early years,” the league said in a statement Monday. “To remedy these effects and preserve competitive balance throughout the league, the parties to the CBA agreed to adjustments to team salary for the 2012 and 2013 seasons. [ESPN]

So, as far as I understand things, here is the recap: The owners opted out of the collective bargaining agreement knowing that the result would be at least one uncapped season (meaning both no maximum cap number AND no minimum cap number for the cheapskates), and then when two of the wealthier teams used the uncapped year to their advantage and threw a bunch of money at players, the other owners cried to Roger Goodell and he dropped an anvil on the rich guys’ heads. Did the Cowboys and Redskins take advantage of a weird situation? Sure. Was it 100% on the up and up? Eh. But stepping in later to punish someone for something that wasn’t against the rules at the time isn’t any better. And this is coming from an EAGLES FAN. Someone who LIVES FOR bad things happening to the Redskins and the Cowboys. I am DEFENDING Jerry Jones and Dan Snyder. Ugh.

I feel nauseous. Don’t make me do this again, NFL.