"Ass like an onion, right?"

The two Vancouver Canucks fans lovingly known as the Green Men claim that they received a warning from Canucks officials before Saturday’s game to curb their behavior that they’ve become somewhat famous for. Basically, they dance around in the green body suits made famous by Charlie Day and they heckle opposing players in the penalty box. Apparently the Predators have grown tired of this.

“Someone through the NHL told us that we were no longer allowed to touch the glass,” said one of the two lads who go by the handles Force and Sully.

“This is the first complaint we’ve ever heard of. The Canucks love us. We haven’t done anything wrong. We pay full price, and we have a little fun while supporting our team.” (Via Toronto Sun)

However, Predators officials deny making any complaint about the Green Men, and we have to believe them, because if there’s one thing that a team does after complaining about something insignificant like annoying fans, it’s own up to it. Yesiree, there’s not a team out there that doesn’t care about people labeling its executives and players as whiny little sissy girls. Good thing fans don’t react to or lash out at these types of complaints at all.

Read the rest of this entry »

Former NHL journeyman left winger Donald Brashear has made a great career decision as he approaches his 40th birthday — he’s getting into mixed martial arts. USA Today is reporting that the currently semi-pro hockey star has signed a contract with promoter Ringside MMA for a minimum of one fight, with possibly as many as three fights set to take place, including a rumored bout on the Ringside 11 car at the Quebec Coliseum on June 4th.

The 6-foot-3, 237-pound Brashear played for the Canadiens, Canucks, Flyers, Capitals and Rangers throughout his NHL career, and is mostly famous for that one time when he pissed off the Boston Bruins so badly that Marty McSorely slashed him in the back of the head with his stick. He’s also semi-famous for a 2000 assault charge wherein he roughing a guy up at the gym for complaining about a baby crawling on the exercise machines. This combination of brain concussion and irrational anger makes Brashear a perfect candidate for MMA.

I guess the major challenge is going to be learning how to fight without pulling on somebody’s sweater. Maybe he’ll innovate the sport and figure out how to pull someone’s sponsored jam shorts up over their head.

We’ve been all about the hockey fights this week, so what’s one more? Only this little tête à tête involves fans, who are just like hockey players, except fatter, slower and generally less attractive. For once, this is a good thing. Vancouver fan, with the elevated seating, clearly has the upper hand, even as his bro half-assedly tries to break it up. Here’s a note to everyone in the English-speaking world: STOP BREAKING UP FIGHTS. You’re ruining it for the rest of us.

Unfortunately, the photographer decided to shoot this sideways. Maybe it was more discreet that way. Maybe he was Quentin Tarantino. I give up. But it’s a badass fight [read: totally one sided. That Anaheim fan gets pummeled, as those fans should] and totally worth whatever neck trauma you endure from cocking your head to the left. Read the rest of this entry »

The NHL will start its 92nd season tonight, but without one of its biggest international stars. Mats Sundin, who spent 13 seasons relatively unworthy of note with the Toronto Maple Leafs, retired yesterday.

“Toronto is and always will be my second home,” said Sundin, who gave special thanks to the Maple Leafs organization.

Sundin, an eight-time NHL all-star, is the leading all-time Swedish scorer in NHL history with 564 goals, 785 assists and 1,349 points. And while he never did win a Cup, captaining Sweden to an Olympic gold medal in 2006 did give his career some closure.

“It was a tough decision,” Sundin told reporters of his retirement. “It’s sad to tell you that my career as a pro hockey player is over.”

During his nearly 20 years in the NHL, Sundin help lead a parade of European stars to North America, including fellow Swede Peter Forsberg. Sundin has already ruled out consideration of playing for his homeland in the 2010 Olympics in Vancouver. Which is too bad, because it’s not like they’re gonna notice one more foreigner over there.

Writing down full descriptions for hockey fights is tiresome and forces me to learn background information I don’t want to know, so here’s a little breakdown of the roles in this quick and dirty Canucks-Oilers dust-up:

Mattias Ohlund: checker
Erik Cole: checkee
Cole’s teammate Sheldon Souray: puncher
Ohlund: punchee

The most important thing about this video?  It’s buying me some more time to put together a sexy WAG gallery for the next post.  And it also gives the hockey fans something to enjoy.  You know, when they’re not too busy reading The New Yorker and sipping brandy.  By which I mean “chewing Red Man.”

[FanIQ]

Swedish garage rockers the Hives are touring North America, and their stop in Vancouver included some time on the ice against the Canucks:

[T]he photogenic fivesome… put a hockey challenge before three Swedish members of the NHL's Vancouver Canucks…

Somehow, amid the clattering of sticks, the swooshing of air, and the slicing of ice skates, the Hives managed to put up five against the highly-trained Canucks. But, alas, it would not be enough, as the professionals– though outnumbered– emerged with a 6-5 victory over their garage-rocking opponents.

Man, this is bringing up of all sorts of old memories for me.  The Hives part of the story takes me back to 2002, when the music world was abuzz over them, the White Stripes, the Strokes, and — to a comically undeserving extent — the Vines.  Meanwhile, the Canucks part of the story takes me back to… ummm… a previous life where I toiled in the icy purgatory of Canadia?

[FanHaus]