Michael Bay's pet tiger El Tigre Magnifico is listening to "Here Comes the Boom."

While working on yet another spotlight-stealing post for Vince at FilmDrunk, I used the ol’ Googles to search news stories about director Michael Bay and I was immediately drawn to the headline of one particular post:

“Hollywood Director, Michael Bay Buys Canucks“

I’ll allow Pam from Archer to give a visual breakdown of my brain upon reading that:

Unfortunately, it took me just two sentences to understand that it was a fake news story, and words can’t even express how disappointed that made me. And there’s obviously no point in discussing a fake sports story, but it’s the basic idea of a guy like Bay purchasing a professional sports franchise that I’ve bumped to the top of my list of things that need to happen immediately. Okay, maybe it’s second behind “Become insanely wealthy and Indecent Proposal Kate Upton” but it’s still a huge priority.

So I got to thinking, “What would it look like if Michael Bay owned a NHL franchise?” *strokes patchy chin stubble* Hmmmmm…

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Man, time sure does fly. It seems like just yesterday I was praising Drew Brees. Actually, it was just yesterday, but I was referring to when I named Brees and the New Orleans Saints winning Super Bowl XLIV the top Sports Moment of 2010. And you know what? That was a boring, predictable pick and it left nothing to the imagination of you, our beloved readers. You deserve more than just the run-of-the-mill year end list, because With Leatherites are smarter than the average sports blog reader, and I know that because I was called an idiot by you guys plenty this year.

You also have a better sense of humor than the average sports blog reader, so when I was entering the qualifications for this year’s Best Sports Moments into my sophisticated super computer (read: old yellow notepad) I wanted to kick the sentimental crap to the curb and really focus on what makes us all tick – namely, poop jokes and hot models. But mostly fun sports moments. As always, I don’t expect everyone to agree, and I’m sure that I left out a few moments here and there (sorry hockey). So feel free to school us on your biggest moments of the year, and let’s all hope that 2012 is a little more sex scandal free…

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Justin Bieber is currently in Toronto to record a TV special for Christmas, and he spent yesterday giving back to his fellow hosers by handing out food at the Daily Bread Food Bank before he made one child’s dream come true. Bieber and a child from the Children’s Wish Foundation of Canada were welcomed by the Toronto Maple Leafs for yesterday’s practice and the Biebs put on a little display of his figure skating mad hockey skillz.

Despite having a reputation for being a spoiled brat, it’s pretty cool that Biebs took the time to make a terminally ill child a little happier, so for today I will go easy on the 17-year old pop star.

*folds up drawings of Bieber falling into a volcano, slides them under pillow*

Meanwhile, the Vancouver Canucks had Canada’s third national treasure* Michael Buble at their practice on Tuesday, but he wasn’t doing anything for charity so he’s not the lede. Buble called the chance to take a shot against Roberto Luongo the greatest day of his life, but unfortunately his shot missed. So he went outside, took a dump on the hood of a cop car and threw a trash can through the window of a Forever 21.

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"Hey Darlene, I found your panties, eh?"

It’s been just over 6 months since the city of Vancouver showed the rest of the world the ugly side of sports, as thousands of pissed off, brain dead sociopaths ransacked their city under the guise of being Vancouver Canucks fans upset that their team lost in the Stanley Cup Finals. The result was hundreds of thousands of dollars in damage to local businesses and city property all because they’re the angry youth and they’ve had it with the man or whatever. I assume Hollywood North isn’t what Time Magazine had in mind when it named “The Protester” the Person of the Year.

But I’m not here to rehash a city’s shameful night, because much credit is due to the Vancouver Police Department, which handed down another 80 charges on 20 more rioters yesterday, bringing the grand total to 80 rioters arrested for 215 charges. And Les Yeo, head of the riot investigation Mounties, says this is far from over.

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During the hockey game between the Philadelphia Flyers and Vancouver Canucks on Wednesday night, the Flyers ran the above commercial, titled “Hockey Fights Cancer,” on their Jumbotron. The video features hockey players imploring fans to help them raise money and awareness in the fight against cancer. When the video ran, a number of Flyers fans booed upon seeing rival hockey players displayed in their arena, and almost immediately people starting falling all over themselves to talk about Philly fans “booing an anti-cancer ad.” Puck Daddy has a nice collection of tweets on the subject (as part of a very reasonable take on the situation), and I’m sure you won’t be surprised to see a number of people going to tired cliches, including, of course, the time Philly fans booed Santa Claus (pictured, at right).

As Uproxx’s resident Philadelphian, this crap drives me bonkers. First of all, you idiots, they were booing their hated rivals, not cancer prevention. I know it fits your narrative to shoehorn everything into the “Haha Philly fans are jerks” angle, but come on. If this happened in Buffalo or San Jose, it’s not a story. And the Santa thing. GOOD LORD, the Santa thing. Do you know when Philly fans booed Santa? 1968. Timely reference. It’s not like they just showed up at a shopping mall and started pelting the guy with ice, either. There was a backstory that actually made it somewhat understandable in context. But every time something like this happens, people trot out these lazy cliches and demonize me and my brethren for the actions of one rogue goon, or things that happened 10-20 years before most of us were born.

The whole thing makes me so angry I could wing batteries at their stupid heads.

It seems like we just can’t go a single day without hearing more bad news about the aftermath of the Stanley Cup Finals. Less than a week after the Boston Bruins defeated the Vancouver Canucks to win their first NHL Championship in 39 years, society is still crumbling around us. First, wannabe anarchists and spoiled brats destroyed the beautiful city of Vancouver under the veil of professional sports, furthering my case for mandatory sterilization of hippies and punks. If that wasn’t bad enough, even more Vancouverites took to the streets again over the weekend to vandalize trash cans by putting trash in them and they painted so much graffiti on the walls that they just look like solid colors now. It’s pretty brutal.

Then Boston decided all of that wasn’t enough. On Saturday, thousands of Bostonians gathered in the streets, as they shouted in unison to show their protest of something. I’m not sure what exactly they were rioting against, but it was so bad that they even had to bring in giant duck boats to transport people through the crowds to protect them. And a white guy was rapping. It was one of the most terrifying things I have ever seen.

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