My friends and I were joking this weekend, as I struggled through watching the UCF Knights blow their game against the Missouri Tigers and the Miami Dolphins really blow their game against the Arizona Cardinals, that I could just do these Faces of ‘Freude (new name, this one’s sticking) posts with pictures of me screaming at bar TVs for three hours every Saturday and Sunday. And yeah, once the Orlando Magic season starts, I may be able to power the entire planet with just my rage. But I’m not sure the world is ready for so many pictures of how handsome I am.

Thankfully, we have Derek Dooley and his derpy dome to fill the void. On the surface, a 3-2 record shouldn’t have a team’s fans searching for the world’s tallest bridge, but Dooley’s Tennessee Volunteers dropped to 0-2 in the SEC after yesterday’s exciting 51-44 loss to the Georgia Bulldogs. I like Dooley and I don’t have any problems with the Vols, so I think it’s encouraging that they’re putting up such a good fight. Hopefully they’ll start winning more so fans can finish washing away the Lane Kiffin stink.

But in the meantime, keep baking those frownies, college football fans.

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This is basically what I look like when I’m watching ‘The Wire’. Somebody draw this guy a warm bath for Christ’s sake. (via Awful Announcing)

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Potentially the 11 Most Crowd-Pleasing TV Deaths of 2012 |Warming Glow|

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Donald Glover Talks About His ‘Amazing Spider-Man’ Easter Egg |Gamma Squad|

The Most Obnoxious Generation: An American Reunion Review |Film Drunk|

On Urban Meyer, Amateurism & Winning |Smoking Section|

The James Van Der Beek 6 Stages Of Fame |UPROXX|

The Incredible Portrait In Portrait Art Of Kim Dong Yoo |UPROXX|

The Start Of Your Ending: Mobb Deep Breaks Up On Twitter? Hav Calls Prodigy Gay? |Smoking Section|

Your Mid-Week Guide To DVD And Streaming |Film Drunk|

The Best And Worst Of WWE Raw 4/9/12: The One With The Three Stooges |With Leather|

Five “Science Reports” We’re Tired Of Seeing |Gamma Squad|

Chevy Chase on ‘Community’: It’s a ‘F*cking Mediocre Sitcom’ |Warming Glow|

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Man, time sure does fly. It seems like just yesterday I was praising Drew Brees. Actually, it was just yesterday, but I was referring to when I named Brees and the New Orleans Saints winning Super Bowl XLIV the top Sports Moment of 2010. And you know what? That was a boring, predictable pick and it left nothing to the imagination of you, our beloved readers. You deserve more than just the run-of-the-mill year end list, because With Leatherites are smarter than the average sports blog reader, and I know that because I was called an idiot by you guys plenty this year.

You also have a better sense of humor than the average sports blog reader, so when I was entering the qualifications for this year’s Best Sports Moments into my sophisticated super computer (read: old yellow notepad) I wanted to kick the sentimental crap to the curb and really focus on what makes us all tick – namely, poop jokes and hot models. But mostly fun sports moments. As always, I don’t expect everyone to agree, and I’m sure that I left out a few moments here and there (sorry hockey). So feel free to school us on your biggest moments of the year, and let’s all hope that 2012 is a little more sex scandal free…

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I’ve often joked that the Florida Gators and their fans were the nouveau riche of college football, having a long history of being the distant 3rd in Florida’s “Big 3″ until only recently coming into success and fame. And the joke grew funnier to me when Urban Meyer arrived and so many Gators fans acted like Steve Spurrier – the reason that they had any national pride at all – never existed. But I’m not putting all Gators fans under that giant umbrella, especially when a true fan like Jen Wiley exists.

Both huge Gators fans, Jen and her husband were married in 1996 and they had their first child, a bouncing baby boy, back in 2006. Because those years are so important to the University of Florida football program and its fans, they decided to honor their favorite team by naming their child Spurrier Urban Wiley. Call me a dick, but I kind of hope he goes to FSU.

“My husband and I got married in 1996, when Spurrier won the championships,” she said, “and then we conceived in 2006 when Urban Meyer won the championship.”

It was a seemingly perfect fit for these Florida fanatics, until now. So mom’s ready for a change.

“I want to change his middle name,” she said.

(Via Bay News 9)

And what does she want to change his middle name to? Tim. As in Tim Tebow, our holy reptilian quarterback. It’s worth pointing out that this woman is from Florida but the child was born in Ohio. That’s like the ultimate double whammy.

What I really enjoy about the article, though, is that the husband’s name is never mentioned, almost as if he didn’t want this story about his child’s ridiculous name being told in the first place. But the real victim in this is poor Billy Donovan. Won’t some insane, overzealous fan name her child after the Gators’ national champion basketball coach? Maybe one day, Billy. Maybe one day.

(Hat tip to Kegs and Eggs.)

Remember when we cared so much about the Ohio State White Elephant Gift Exchange Scandal that tattoo parlor operators were being sent to jail and players were getting suspended by the NFL for things they might’ve done in college? Well, Penn State happened and caused 90% of non-sports America to forget OSU is even a school, so the Buckeyes are free to go about the business of organizing a football team and making news … and today’s news is big, suggesting that former Florida head football coach Urban Meyer is set to take over the program with a a seven-year, $40 million deal.

Of course, I’m using “news” loosely for two major reasons. Reason #1:

“The concerns are still there,” Meyer told The Sun. “No. 1 — my health. No. 2 — my family. No. 3 — the state of college football. I’ve done some research into the second one. I’ve found that it is possible to have balance between your job and your family, that there are coaches out there who are doing it.

“I’m in a good place right now mentally and physically. So if something happens with Ohio State, I’ll have a decision to make. But there has been no interview. There has been no offer to make a decision about.”

That’s normal though, right? People are always denying deals and relationships and showing up the next night arm-in-arm with some 40-million-dollar thing. And technically what he’s saying could still be true. Why would you need to interview a guy like Urban Meyer? You know his history, you know what he can do. And he said “there has been no offer to make a decision about”, not “there has been no offer”, so maybe the choice was obvious. Urban Meyer is coming to Ohio!

Except, no. Reason #2: David Pingalore is the sports director of the Orlando television station that broke the story on Tuesday night, and under “football” and “television” on his Facebook info page he lists “reporting bullsh*t with no verification” as a like. Last year, our own Burnsy had fun with him in response to hilarious community douchebaggery by “leaking” a story to someone Ping knows about how the University of Central Florida was going to be invited to join the Big East. Like clockwork, Ping heard about it reported it on TV as breaking news from his “inside sources”. It went as far as ESPN. The next day it was gloriously shot down.

So that’s Urban Meyer saying “no, I’m not going to Ohio State” and a disreputable source breaking the story. Do we need a day and a half’s worth of speculation on ESPN? Let’s source this when it actually gets sourced, and at least attempt to do our impossibly unprofessional job professionally.

In a related story, here is a slideshow of girls in bikinis.

The Jacksonville Jaguars are on pace to have their season opener against the Tennessee Titans blacked out. The Tampa Bay Buccaneers, despite going 10-6 last season, are still having the same old problems selling tickets, so their games are going to be blacked out this season. And now fans of the Miami Dolphins, after almost 40 years of disappointment and two decades of playing without a quarterback, are staying home, too.

The Dolphins also plan to make it clear to their fans that tickets sales for regular-season games are not going as well as the team would like and that could mean blackouts of several meaningful regular-season games are about to happen.

Several home games on the regular-season schedule — starting with the Week 2 game against Houston — are so far from being sold out that the club is warning fans the only way to see them might be to buy tickets. (Via The Miami Herald)

But wait a second guys, can’t the Dolphins at least come up with some terrible gimmick ideas to try to sell some extra tickets? You know, something that will completely backfire and piss off even their most loyal fans?

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