I had a great joke ready to go, but Bob’s Blitz beat me to it:
You had no idea that King Hippo was a real, live, MMA fighter, now did you?
It’s glorious. Just like the character from Mike Tyson’s Punch-Out!!, a fat, bald guy in gym shorts and gloves takes a few shots to the head from his opponent and feels no pain. So he starts raising his arms and opening his mouth, opening himself up for a free shot. That leaves him open, and he goes down to one well-placed punch. The only thing missing is the Hippo 8-bit blip scream and Great Tiger waiting in the wings. He should show up to his next fight with an X patch over his navel.
For an hilarious added bonus, wait until the 0:46 mark when some random guy comes flipping into the ring from the sky for no reason. I wish MMA was always this weird.
If you enjoy one punch WMMA knockouts, here’s all 8 seconds of Kaline Medeiros vs Stephanie Eggink. I’m pretty sure that if you’re an MMA fighter, this is the worst you can do at your job. (via Cage Potato)
As much as I’d like to take credit for that headline, YouTube user dannymorales82 beat me to it.
What you’re witnessing here is the very unfortunate thing that happened when Shai Lindsey took a flurry of shots from Carlo Junio, smiled about it and tried out his best Bane “come at me, bro” taunt. He gets kicked in the face, as anyone doing that taunt should, and after a few shots to the head the only people “coming at him” are trainers and medics. Poor guy. It’s embarrassing enough to be fighting at an event called “Tuff-N-Uff FestiBrawl”.
Open letter to the Shai Lindsey camp: next time he gets knocked out like that, have one of your guys swoop in with a bottle of hair dye. If you fix that crappy mohawk thing, maybe MMA guys won’t want to cave in his face so badly.
The fight starts around the 4:30 mark and is over two kicks later, so don’t blink. Bruce Boyington has more difficulty with the cage than with Keegan Hornstra.
Here’s to hoping the fans who paid to get into NEF Fight Night 3 found something fun to do with the rest of their night. Not a lot to do in Lewiston, Maine. Catch seafood in wire crates, watch guys get spin-kicked to death … yeah, I’m spent.
[H/T to Maine Lobster Mobster by way of MiddleEasy]