No, I said your dunk face.

If this is your first time on the Internet this week, let me catch you up to speed: DeAndre Jordan of the Los Angeles Clippers dunked so heinously over Pistons guard Brandon Knight that our lives were changed, Brandon Knight died and now we’re all living in an alternate universe. I don’t know how it happened. It was so ferocious that the Internet put a Jim Ross call behind it and started a new meme. It was something.

Under Armour was quick to jump on the DeAndre Jordan’s Dunk Was Memorable bandwagon, have produced a series of animated t-shirts and are asking fans to recreate Jordan’s signature “eesh” face for an Instagram contest:

Want to win a trip to LA for you and a friend to meet DeAndre Jordan? Upload your best #DeAndreDunkFace to Instagram to enter for your chance to win.

The rules are intensely thorough, and I invite you to read them all for gems like “photo must not contain images of athletes in uniform,” and the suspiciously let-my-nephew-win-this fine print reading “sponsor reserves the right to contact competitors for additional information prior to selecting the winner.”

If you’re entering this, be sure to post your dunk face in the comments below.

Washington Nationals sophomore Bryce Harper is probably going to be one of the best players of this generation and possibly the best player with a faux hawk in Major League Baseball history. So it’s only natural that we’ll soon be saturated with endless ads proclaiming how amazing the 20-year old phenom is, and the campaign will begin with his new Under Armour commercial.

Harper has been hard at work preparing for his second season in the Majors, as he took a trip back to his hometown of Las Vegas for his intense offseason workout plan that makes my morning walk to the bathroom sound almost meaningless.

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Last weekend, as some friends and I drove past the lovely harbor city* of Baltimore, someone mentioned how he used to work at Under Armour.  Apparently, the jock-frat mentality goes all the way to the top, where chest bumps are not out of place at board meetings.  So it's not some huge surprise that their employees' language isn't exactly ready for network TV.  Still, I always appreciate a good F-bomb on TV. Click-clack and such.

*Lovely harbor city, decayed urban dystopia.  Potayto, potahto.

Props: Deadspin, whose editor, it should be noted, no longer sports emo bangs.