Randy Edsall Hired by Maryland

Written by Ryan Walsh / 01.03.11

Now-former Connecticut football coach Randy Edsall was hired to coach at the University of Maryland, yesterday, which is odd, considering he turned down the opportunity to coach Syracuse, his alma mater, in 2009 and because his team was dominated by Oklahoma in the Fiesta Bowl. Edsall had been the only coach of UConn since their rise to the FBS, guiding the team to their first bowl game in 2004, and their first BCS bowl this season. After arranging the deal, Edsall his best Lane Kiffin impression by not addressing his team about the decision.

Edsall did not accompany the team on its charter flight back to Connecticut, and players said he told them nothing of his coaching plans after the Fiesta Bowl loss to Oklahoma. A freshman who asked not to be identified told the Hartford Courant that Edsall informed some of his players over the phone.

“It really pisses me off because he made [running back] Jordan [Todman] address the team last night to say he was leaving [for the NFL draft],” said the freshman, who also expressed his desire to transfer. “And he isn’t man enough to do it face to face to us?

“A lot of people were just really upset by the call. He made Todman get up and tell the whole team: ‘Jordan, I think you have something to say to these guys.’ He made him do it face-to-face. But he didn’t do it face-to-face.” –ESPN.com

A pretty scumbag move from Edsall, who was also a candidate to fill the Notre Dame vacancy last season. Edsall replaces Ralph Friedgren, who was let go despite having another year left on his contract. Initial reports said that Maryland made the move in order to grab Mike Leach while he was available, but that would make too much sense, considering his strong recruiting ties to Texas, and success in a more competitive conference. Maryland, however, decided to go with Edsall, who recruited heavily from New England prep schools and went 5-2 in his best season in the abysmal Big East. Personally, I would have gone with Leach, but I’m biased because of my disdain for UConn and the spoiled children of ESPN analysts.

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Geno Auriemma: Back to the Kitchen

Written by Ryan Walsh / 12.31.10

The UConn women’s record-setting 90 game consecutive win steak is over after losing to 8th ranked Stanford 71-59 last night. And thank God they did, I was getting sick of all their Sports Center coverage and the ensuing feminist rhetoric. We gave you the right to vote, ladies, so on behalf of all American males, I respectfully ask that you spend less time on basketball, and more time on the intricate art of sandwich-making. Your priorities are all wrong.

There are about 500 reasons why this loss is so fantastic, but certainly my favorite is that Geno Auriemma lost. Considering that the man hadn’t lost any of the last 90 games he coached, us haters of all things UConn will have to cherish this milestone in bad things happening to infuriating people.

The only downside of this loss is that ESPN will try and make us care about women’s basketball all day. And although I’d love to say that I don’t care about women’s basketball, I can’t, because that wouldn’t adequately describe my level of apathy. On a scale of 1 to anything written by Peter King it’s about equal to Seltzer-Freidberg movies, Twilight, or Basketball Wives.

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NOTRE DAME’S DARKHORSE CANDIDATE

Written by JOSH Z / 12.10.09

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UConn’s Randy Edsall–who beat Notre Dame in front of Touchdown Jesus and all of South Bend earlier this year–has been rumored to be in the running for the Golden Domers’ head job. Edsall, the only coach UConn has had since its football program reached Division I-A status in 2000, is considered Notre Dame’s backup candidate in the event that Brian Kelly–whom many of you said would not be taking the job in South Bend–doesn’t take the job in South Bend.

Edsall and Kelly present contrasting styles, while Kelly is very outspoken and offensive minded, Edsall is known as a defensive coach and is more reserved in temperament. While Kelly has taken the Bearcats to two BCS bowls in three seasons, Edsall’s ascent as a top college football coach has been more gradual.

Edsall was at Notre Dame stadium Nov. 21, the night when former Irish coach Charlie Weis said his own fate was sealed. That night UConn upset the Irish 33-30 in overtime. –Digital Sports Daily.

Edsall and his Huskies had the unique and dubious experience of enduring the death of a player in the middle of the season. His team dedicated their performance to Jasper Howard before narrowing losing to Kelly’s Bearcats. But he seems like a solid backup option compared to what caliber of coach Notre Dame is capable of bringing in. And he’s white, which I’m sure they like over there. Can’t really blame Charlie Strong for taking himself out of consideration so early.

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UCONN TO TRAVEL WITHOUT LUCKY NUNS

Written by JOSH Z / 04.01.09

Jim Calhoun learned that he’ll have none of the nun support that followed him and his Huskies to Final Four appearances in 1999 and 2004. Mother Shaun Vergauwan and Sister Mary Richards won’t be making this week’s trip to Detriot, and just when we thought they were getting into a habit. From NBC Connecticut:

The sisters gave Calhoun a jar of bubblegum almost 10 years ago. As a thank you for the gift, he offered them a trip to the Final Four whenever UConn made it.

But despite being invited again by Coach Calhoun, the Meriden nuns won’t be making the trip to Detroit this year.[...]

The pair are a part of the Franciscan Sisters of the Eucharist, and they will be receiving a special visitor from the Vatican this weekend, Cardinal Jean-Louis Tauran, according to the Meriden Record Journal.

The nuns admitted that the team lost a couple of games that they had attended earlier in the year, but it was in a real wink-wink, CIA sort of God really does care about sports sort of way. Everyone knows that God hated the Buffalo Bills, loves the Patriots, and ALWAYS bets the over. They call it a Hail Mary for a reason…but I don’t know what that reason is.

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COLLEGE BALLS ARE BOUNCING AGAIN TONIGHT

Written by JOSH Z / 03.26.09

March Madness resumes tonight as the NCAA Tournament comes off its weekday hiatus with four games tonight. The best games tonight will be UConn facing Purdue (7:07 ET tip) and Duke playing Villa-no-fun in the late slot. So I’ll miss two games tonight on TV no matter what…so I was here at the bar getting drunk all afternoon for nothing?

COED Magazine put together a solid Sweet Sixteen cheerleader gallery for all the matchups tonight and tomorrow night (sorry, pervs, all of the photo subjects are over 16). And if you actually want to see the games not in your area (most likely Xavier-Pittsburgh and Missouri-Memphis), there’s always your computer. Nerd.

And apparently there’s some uproar about whether this towel boy from UConn was housing this Nate Miles fellow and giving him cars or whores or whatever. The former student manager was actually a registered agent, I guess. I’m shocked, shocked that any player representative would work in such an underhanded way. But that doesn’t explain why this story is the only thing anyone can talk about today.
Read the rest of this entry »

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OH YEAH, THIS GAME WAS REALLY LONG

Written by JOSH Z / 03.13.09

We had to get to the game between Syracuse and UConn in the Big East tournament last night. This game looked like Syracuse had won it, but when a last-second three was declared no good after video review, the game went to overtime. Six overtimes.

There were the numbers, from the 3 hours, 46 minutes it took to play the game that ended at 1:22 a.m., to the combined 244 points, 102 of which came after the regulation buzzer, to the eight players who fouled out, to the six who registered double-doubles.

And that wasn’t nearly all. Just ask Syracuse point guard Jonny Flynn, who had 34 points and 11 assists in a game-high 67 minutes, only 3 fewer than were played.

“I just wanted to get the game over with,” he said. “I was thinking, `Lord, just get this game over with. Whoever wins the game, let’s just get it over with.’ “

I don’t understand why a game becomes epic just because it was longer. But that standard, when applied to highways, sub sandwiches, and male genitalia, seems to work just fine. Oh, Syracuse won, by the way. What did they win? A chance to play West Virginia tonight in the semifinal round. And maybe the admiration of their peers. Which is nice, but you can’t buy stuff with it.

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