Nick Symmonds: Bro.

I have a ton of respect for America’s Olympic athletes, from the young ladies of the Fierce 5 to the members of the Men’s Basketball Team (yes, even LeBron James) and even for a stuttering human meatloaf like Ryan Lochte. But it’s time for Lochte to step his game up, because there’s a new, bolder bro in town and his name is Nick Symmonds.

While Lochte’s been off filming stints on 90210 and frolicking with Prince Harry’s ginger B-hole in Las Vegas pools, Symmonds has kept his training going strong beyond the Olympics. Not content with his 5th place finish (a personal best) in the 800m race at the 2012 Summer Games, Symmonds has taken his competitive nature to new heights, as he recently competed for the world record in the legendary Beer Mile.

The point of the beer mile is to chug one beer before running each lap on a ¼ mile track, which sounds awesome because I’m really good at that chugging beer part. Unfortunately, I suck at the running part. Symmonds, on the other hand is awesome at both, and he trained for his recent record attempt in the worst possible fashion.

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