It’s the age-old question that men have wondered about women forever. Sure, they’re not physically capable of peeing standing up or opening a jar of mayonnaise (like you need the extra calories, sweetie), but can a well-endowed lady overcome her two biggest obstacles and routinely hit great golf shots?

In the mid-nineties, outspoken golf analyst, Ben Wright was quoted as saying, “Women are handicapped by having boobs. It’s not easy for them to keep their left arm straight, and that’s one of the tenets of the game. Their boobs get in the way.” That… and a number of other inflammatory statements… ultimately got the bombastic broadcaster fired, but the issue of “breasts and the golf swing” has never gone away, and… it’s important to note… there are some who feel breasts can actually give a woman an advantage.

–Golf Girl’s Diary

It’s almost unfortunate that none of this applies to the trannies, who now have been given the red light to play on the LPGA after that league removed a clause from its rules requiring players to be “female at birth.” Those ladies get to play with a man’s hands, a man’s legs and other genetic material that we won’t address specifically. Oh, but they’re totally equal. Whatever.

The transsexual L.A. Times sportswriter who was born as and most recently wrote a sports column under the name “Mike Penner,” was found dead in his apartment Saturday, suspectingly of suicide.

Penner, who had lived most of “his” life as a man, caused a national furor when, in 2007, he announced that he was going on vacation and coming back as Christine Daniels. “She” continued to work for the Times, and then inexplicably switched back to the “Mike Penner” byline fifteen months later. Penner was 52.

I don’t mean to make light of gender identity disorder, but I question why people, who are supposedly miserable as gender A, expect to just take a few weeks off and then try and re-enter the exact same past life as Gender B. And I don’t say that out of damnation, but I wonder how and why Christine finally allowed herself to escape from Mike Penner’s life…only to assume command of it, and seemingly changing nothing but her wardrobe. That’s a lot to ask of one person supposedly looking for a fresh start. And while others might have more scathing remarks than mine about transsexuality in America (whether expressed outwardly or otherwise), it’s hard to blame anyone for not giving Christine a chance when Mike couldn’t even do the same for her, either.

I guess Fanhouse picked this up last week, but hermaphrodite athletes always get the green light around here. Wait, what I meant to say was…when a woman has a penis, I want to find out more about it. No! I was trying to say that women that used to have penises are in demand…No, no, actually, see…if there’s a woman that has a…forget it. Just roll the blockquote.

Sarah Gronert, 22, was born with both male and female genitalia but later had surgery to remove the male organs and is now legally certified as a woman. But even with the surgery, the tennis world is locked in a debate over whether she belongs on the women’s professional circuit.

The coach of one player who was bested by Gronert says no way ["No way, Jose!" Although this took place in Germany, and the chances of being called "Jose" there are quite slim, I'd guess--Ed].

“There is no girl who can hit serves like that, not even Venus Williams,” said Schlomo Tzoref, who coaches player Julia Glushko. Glushko recently lost to Gronert in a tournament in Israel.

Transgendered people in sports drive me nuts. And it’s not because I’m some big, mean, tranny hater. It’s because the gender line is one of the last surviving relics of society, and that’s not even a line anymore. It looks like some streaked glass window that Najeh Davenport wiped his ass on. So I don’t know how you’d say, “Eh, she could play,” but I also don’t know how you’d say she couldn’t.

I bet she could smoke some mean pole, though. …WHO SAID THAT?!

|NY Daily News|

If you paid any attention to the Beijing Olympics last year, you realized that (a) Michael Phelps is really, really fast, and (b) the Chinese are kinda goofy in how they handle their information. But gender-identity dilemmas will always get run here, even if the only site reporting it is some UK-based Tumblr-looking site called Ananova:

Xiao Nan, of Chengdu, won more than 40 medals as a women [sic] in student competitions after graduating from high school. But after hospital tests confirmed Xiao’s suspicions that she was really a man she has thrown out all but 10 of them.[...]

Why ten?

[I]nside, she felt confused: “I felt I often had an impulse or desire for women instead of men. And my body is more like a man than a woman.” Xiao had a check-up at a local hospital and the result confirmed she had male chromosomes. He is now living as a man and has begun a course of sex change surgery at Sichuan Xichan Plastic Surgery Hospital which will take nine months.

Male chromosomes? So she had his blood check and they found out he wasn’t a woman? Whatever. I’d believe this story more if she sprouted wings and turned into a dragon. How awesome would that be–transvestite dragons invading China from within. Eh; whatever keeps out the Muslims, I guess.