Hello hello hello! Welcome back to the Best & Worst of TNA Impact, alternately known as “Jesus Christ, are we still in the UK?” A few things before we get to the (thankfully) final installment under the monarchy.

- I went to 2CW’s Niagara Falls show last week, and this is a thing that happened! For those of you who regularly read this column, you’ll know that this is pretty much one of the best things that could ever happen, and it’s a miracle I am writing this week because my heart almost burst from sheer joy. As an aside, please note that I am 5’2 ¾”, and he is officially listed at a cool Danny Briere 5’9. Mmhmm. Okay Spikey.

- While I was hanging out in a wrestling ring with Spike Dudley and fangirling over Jojo Bravo at a merch table with the effervescent Rachel Summerlyn, Brandon got to go to Elimination Chamber and a WWE press conference. He did a TOTALLY CONTROVERSIAL podcast about these experiences that you should listen to here. He also got to meet Big Show and Mark Henry, and had I not done the aforementioned, I would probably ragequit the internet from blind jealousy. You can listen to his fun and less divisive podcast about that here. Chris Trew is involved, and hey, we all love that guy (we should all love that guy).

- Twitter is a nifty little thing, and if you think so too, you should absolutely follow me here. With Leather is good times and occasionally posts about cats on treadmills (the best kinds of posts), so follow them here, and our UPROXX mothership here. Like us on Facebook, rock the tumblr, and share (or whatever the verb is) on Reddit, too. We like shares and follows and likes and such, so do it as much as you can! You can even use buzzwords and get proactive and in your face about it!

- Shout-out to Wrestling Bro Prime Casey for the GIFs.

This week on Impact: A title changes hands, Joseph Park flies, and after some serious consideration, a #1 contender is picked for the World Heavyweight Championship. Onwards and upwards, my friends!

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Reminder: She's the referee.

Cheerio! ‘ello Guvnah! Whatever stereotypical British greeting you’d like me to give! I hope you all had a wonderful week, and a very special Anna Howard Shaw Day. A few things before we get on to the (thankfully) final episode from the UK.

- This weekend I will be heading across the border for Squared Circle Wrestling’s Heat Wave (scroll to the bottom for the card) event in Niagara Falls, NY. Jessica Havok! Christina Von Eerie! Rachel f’n Summerlyn! SPIKE DUDLEY! If there’s no report next week, it will be because my heart literally folded in on itself like an Autobot transforming. If you like the idea of seeing any of these wrestlers, and also hanging out in American Niagara at a bar that doesn’t even have a website, then by all means come out, say hello, enjoy some badass ladies and little Spikey, and hope our cars don’t get broken into!

- This week at The Wrestling Blog, I interviewed ACW’s own Jack Jameson. Head on over, watch some fun matches, and compliment him on his full and manly beard. I’ve been close to it in person and it’s nothing short of glorious.

- So this Social Media fad is pretty fun and far out, so why not get on board and follow me on twitter? With Leather is here, and UPROXX is also worth a follow. We also appreciate likes and shares and up votes and all those good things, so hit as many buttons as possible when prompted. It helps spread the word, and lets me keeping doing things like posting pictures of myself eating a burrito on a legit sports comedy website.

This week on Impact: In what feels like the longest UK tour ever, Hogan kind of sort of makes a tournament, shows that his poopies face isn’t just for disapproval, and gets lost in the hallways of Wembley Arena. Find out if he chooses an opponent for Jeff Hardy at Lockdown or gets committed to an assisted care facility after the jump!

Hello again, lovelies! My apologies for not being able to write last week’s column. As you know, Brandon and I attended National Pro Wrestling Day in Philadelphia, and traveling took away any opportunity to write. A few things:

- National Pro Wrestling Day, despite having some brief, gross, unpleasantness (I’m looking at you, Resistance Pro), was a wonderful experience full of great wrestling, hanging with old and new Wrestling Bros, sharing Halloween costume photos with Dasher Hatfield, and somehow becoming Kobald’s Valentine. Jervis Cottonbelly, the World’s Sweetest Man, was also there, and if any of you know anything about me, it’s that I was elated to indulge in some Gentlemania. If you haven’t checked it out, I encourage everyone to purchase it here, and get a taste of something wonderful we got to be a part of.

- Speaking of lovely masked fellows, you should head on over to The Wrestling Blog, where I wrote a thing you should read.

- Do you like the Social Media? Do you understand it better than Hulk Hogan? Why not follow me on Twitter? Or perhaps With Leather and/or UPROXX for all of your entertainment needs? There is a 27% chance we will tweet a picture of Brooke Hogan’s legs, and only a 3% chance we’ll get defensive about it.

- As always, comments, likes, tweets, shares, and tumbls are always appreciated. This may not be the best show or the best report, but if you’re desperately curious as to what I do to procrastinate, hoo boy you best get to reading!

This week on Impact: We’re (not so) live in the UK! Some boring stuff happens, tumbleweeds drift by, something you won’t ever remember probably happens, and then something happens THAT WILL SHAKE ME TO MY VERY CORE.

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Best poll ever.

So not that you read these almost-daily reminders of what sports programming you can watch each evening instead of reading literature or interacting with other human beings, but yesterday I made a bit of a whoopsy-daisy and posted all of the sports programming for tonight. My apologies to anyone who got wasted in preparation for Drexel/Old Dominion.

However, I hope that the awesome wheel kick knockout from Tuesday’s The Ultimate Fighter was enough of a distraction, because it was awesome.

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One of the weirdest running jokes in the world of professional wrestling is that legendary champion, Impact Wrestling General Manager and sex tape star Hulk Hogan has a thing for his daughter, Brooke. Most people came to this conclusion when pictures (like the one above) of Hulk thoroughly dousing her ass and ass-related areas with lotion showed up online. Then, he married a lady who looks exactly like her. Then they devoted two months of Impact TV time to Hogan desperately trying to keep his 24-year old daughter away from the clutches of BOYFRIENDS~. That ended with her trying to get married and her boobs falling out.

Anyway, the legend continues.

Over the weekend, the Hulkster took to his TWITTAH MACHINE to share a picture of Brooke. While that in itself is not creepy, the picture IS, and the caption makes it way, way worse.

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Hola, fellow Impact lovers! Or…tolerators! Let’s get some pre-show notes going!

- If reading isn’t enough, I did two podcasts this week. The first, a look back at one of my favourite matches, Spike Dudley vs. Mike Awesome at Guilty as Charged 2000 for Wrestlespective Radio. The second was my official induction into the Wrestling Blog, where Tom Holzerman and I manage to keep the Chikara talk to a surprising minimum, but are free wheelin’ with love for Rachel Summerlyn. So stuff those in your ear holes!

- Again, Brandon and I will be reppin’ the good name of With Leather at National Pro Wrestling Day. ACH and the Estonian Thunder Frog will be there, and if you’ve paid attention to anything I ever do ever, you know I am super duper excited and can’t wait to see either of them. If you can make it, you should do it, because good wrestling is fun, but good wrestling for free is the best!

- You should follow us in as many ways as possible. My twitter is here, With Leather lives here, and UPROXX pilots the mother ship over here. You can tweet and like and tumbl and share on reddit and do whatever you can to make sure people are reading, and someone, one day, realizes that they have the power to put Jeff Jarrett on television and it is a really, really bad idea so they won’t.

This week on Impact: Joseph Park, some other stuff, more Joseph Park, and then some other stuff with people and wrestling and things. And Joseph Park!

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