While he spends most of his days peddling overpriced autographs on his website and pimping his LockerDome webpage on Twitter, baseball’s all-time hits leader, Pete Rose, is still trying desperately to cling to relevance ever since he seemingly gave up his quest to be admitted into Major League Baseball’s Hall of Fame. Back in July, word surfaced that Rose’s plan to recapture his glory included a reality television show about him and his significantly younger Playboy model fiancée, Kiana Kim, and their road to marriage.

Of course TLC, the network that has brought us such educational classics as My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding, Abby and Brittany, My Strange Addiction, Breaking Amish, Toddlers & Tiaras and, obviously, Here Comes Honey Boo Boo, picked the show up, because it had just enough train wreck flair to warrant a six-episode run. And now, there’s no turning back, because Pete Rose: Hits & Mrs. has a debut date.

Chronicling preparations for Rose and his fiancee, ex-Playboy model Kiana Kim, as they blend their families and prepare for wedded life, the six-part docu-series will launch on the cable network Monday, Jan. 14, at 10 p.m.

According to the official synopsis, the 71-year-old Rose — who has been banned from professional baseball due to his gambling — and Kim will face “challenges other families face.” The upcoming nuptials mark Rose’s third trip down the aisle, while Kim has two children from a previous relationship. (Via The Hollywood Reporter)

Challenges other families face? I suppose that means the trials and tribulations of a couple 40 years apart, as women who can only find love with men north of 70 who have always looked like pillow cases stuffed with rocks need a couple to look up to. Perhaps if Cooperstown never comes calling, there will be a place in the reality TV Hall of Fame for Rose. Somewhere between the woman who eats couch cushions and that guy who punched Snooki.

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With the widespread use of social media and, more specifically the popularity of a jackass like Jose Canseco, I’m surprised that we don’t hear more from or about Pete Rose. Hell, I’m surprised that what may or may not be his Twitter account only has 4,000+ followers. But I guess that just means that the 71-year old all-time MLB hits leader has settled into the reality that most people just don’t give a crap about him anymore.

Apparently TLC missed that memo. The network once known as The Learning Channel has famously brought us shows like Toddlers and Tiaras, Jon and Kate Plus 8, 19 Kids and Counting, Sister Wives, and Extreme Couponing. Now, the network is adding a Pete Rose reality show to its stable. Is it about a legendary athlete now in his twilight years, ready to do whatever it takes to prove to the fans who once worshipped him that he was wrong for gambling and lying, and beg the forgiveness of the sport that made him a star so that he might one day enter Cooperstown before he takes his final breath?

No. It’s about him and his Playboy model girlfriend. Good for you, Charlie Hustle.

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Back in 2010, I introduced us to Sheyla Hershey, a Brazilian woman in Houston living her dream of holding a world record for the largest breasts. In 2009, she had surgery to increase her 38FFF boobs to 38KKK in order to capture the record, and by 2010 she was informed by doctors that she was suffering from staph infections in both of her breasts and she needed to either have breast reduction surgery or she would eventually lose both of her breasts. Oh, and she might have died, too. I feel like that’s important.

Hershey had the surgery and surrendered her title, but then last year she told the Grim Reaper to motorboat her, because she once again enhanced her breasts back to 38KKK to reclaim her world record. And then she allegedly tried to kill herself two times. Thankfully, a very respectable party has stepped in to put a stop to this nonsense.

Just kidding, TLC is feeding the monster now. Hershey will soon be featured on the ridiculous show, My Strange Addiction, and I’m sure it will only be a matter of time before she gets her own travel show called Hershey Highway.

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