President Barack Obama is finally doing what we elected him to do: he’s berating the NHL owners and players for being jerks about money so we can have pro hockey again. Well, that’s what I elected him to do.

The POTUS issued a thorough, partisan-free statement in an interview with WCCO-TV in Minneapolis, and if Gary Bettman missed it and reads With Leather (which I’m sure is the case), I hope he reads it carefully:

“My message to owners and to players is, ‘You guys make a lot of money and you make a lot of money on the backs of fans, so do right by your fans. You can figure out how to spread out a bunch of revenue that you’re bringing in, but do right by the people who support you,”‘ Obama said. “And I shouldn’t have to be involved in a dispute between really wealthy players and even wealthier owners. They should be able to settle this themselves. And remember who it is that’s putting all that money in their pockets.”

This isn’t the first time Obama’s spoken out about the lockout … back in October he stared into the dark abyss that is Jay Leno, broke out a flippant “y’all” and told the warring factions to get their shit together. This is also what he does during Middle East peace talks.

Read the rest of this entry »

Back in January, Boston Bruins goalie Tim Thomas stirred the political pot a great deal when he refused to attend his team’s visit to the White House to meet President Barack Obama for their Stanley Cup Championship. Instead, Thomas posted some anti-government rhetoric – or his beliefs, rather – on his Facebook page to further stroke the media’s erection. So it shouldn’t have come as much of a surprise when reporters asked him how he felt about having to play in Barry O’s hometown in the first round of the NHL playoffs.

He also shouldn’t have been surprised when Washington Capitals fans showed up prepared with signs and Obama masks, like the options that were offered by the puckheads at Russian Machine Never Breaks. Sure enough, Caps fans printed them out and poured into the Verizon Center in D.C. last night and they gave Thomas hell. Oh, the Bruins also beat the Caps 4-3 and lead the series 2-1, but the real victory… that was had by the Caps fans.

Read the rest of this entry »

The Stanley Cup Finals are going to game 7. Of course, there’s not a LeBron to be found in the NHL, not even Aaron Rome (although retroactively Eric Lindros came pretty close), so it’s hard to get things like Twitter excited about it. One thing is for sure: win or lose, Tim Thomas deserves the Conn Smythe Trophy. For those of you who don’t follow hockey, each year the Conn Smythe is awarded to the league’s most handsome goaltender.

Sports

Bruins Force Game 7 - If you aren’t following this, you should be, because the Bruins didn’t just decide to give up circa game 4 or 5 and call it a season. Scroll down and read all the hockey coverage, until you can’t handle it anymore and all the jokes about basketball and the Heat start being fresh and funny again. [Yardbarker]

Who Wants to Watch Chris Bosh Cry While Heading into the Locker Room? - I do, I do! But it’s always sad to see such a kind-hearted forest creature cry. [BroBible]

We Are Allowed To Hate The Miami Heat - In case you missed it yesterday, check out Mayor Burnsy’s manifesto about why it’s okay to get all bent-out-of-shape-happy about what happened in the basketballs. My version of this would just be the words CLEVELAND in big letters. [With Leather]

That Ken Burns Crap - Jason Fry does Ken Burns, and baseball is still happening whether you like it or not. Sports blogs are always better when they include the phrase “in my younger years”. [Faith and Fear]

Not Sports

The Best of The Venture Bros. Cosplay - I remember going to the Detroit City Motor-Con (or whatever the hell it was called) a few years ago and having more people react to my Henchman 24 t-shirt club shirt than most of the costumes. This gallery will give you a great idea why. We’re gonna recreate parts of this gallery on CNN later as “The Best of Jackie O Cosplay”. [Gamma Squad]

Every Zach Galifianakis Clip From Tim & Eric - Hoo … bastank. One of my favorite memories was going to a Washington Nationals game and running into Zach freaking Galifianakis. For those of you who are all ONE TRICK PONY ONLY GOT ONE SCHTICK BLURGHH, watch these videos and laugh the weirder parts of your ass off. [Adult Swim]

Meme Watch: The Best Of Hipster Edits - Like any Austin Texas resident I sure do hate the word “hipster”, but these get funnier and funnier as they go. Hipsters don’t edit things, they put birds on things and call it art. [Uproxx]

Bad Medicine: The Most Incompetent TV Doctors - You know the state of TV doctors is bad when Dr. Nick Riviera comes in at number ten. Every TV doctor is bad, because they have to spend the first 40 minutes being wrong to be “right” at the end and create exciting television. Sort of like those Law and Order episodes where they build and build and build and then the person’s all OH BY THE WAY I DID IT AND AM GUILTY as they’re fading to the credits. [UGO]

edit: Also, I still can’t believe that character’s name was seriously “Christian Shephard”.

One of the weirder things about the NHL is the William Jennings Trophy. At the end of each season, the trophy is awarded “the goalkeeper(s) having played a minimum of 25 games for the team with the fewest goals scored against it. Winners are selected based on regular-season play.” This used to be the criterion for awarding the Vezina Trophy, but that was back in 1927 when most teams only had one…I’m getting off track.

Anyway, the Boston Bruins had the lowest team GAA last season, which led to this humorous exchange between the team’s goalies, Tim Thomas and Manny Fernandez, at the NHL Awards show last night. I’m sure that’s a Canadian thing for hockey players to be thanking each other’s wives like that. But usually they take care of that sort of thing backstage, if you know what I mean. And I think you do. And you thought the Stanley Cup was passed around a lot…

|Thanks, Jaggerkings|