Caster Semenya, that South African middle distance sprinter whose gender identity came under fire after winning the 800 meters in Berlin last summer, is getting sick of sitting around while the governing bodies of track and field decide whether she’s eligible to compete as a female.

“I hereby publicly announce my return to athletics competitions,” Semenya said in a statement on Tuesday shortly after a meet in South Africa denied the 19-year-old world champion’s request to run.

“I am an athlete first and foremost and it is vital for my competitiveness, my well being and for my preparations for events during the European summer that I measure my performance against other athletes,” she said.

The IAAF, the sport’s international governing body, doesn’t seem to be in any real hurry to resolve her case. Read the rest of this entry »

A couple of people have sent me this clip from a Japanese TV show, either because (a) they know that anything that parodies Usain Bolt has a better-than-average chance of being linked up, or (b) they’re aware of my unwavering, disgusting fascination with blackface. And honestly, the entire movie industry was founded on blackface. Yes, it’s reprehensible in this day and age for someone in America to do it, but I don’t remember Japan kidnapping and then enslaving boatloads of Africans to build their agricultural output that would serve as the foundation for their economy for generations to come and help nurture the industrialization that would make them the world’s last true hegemon. Americans should never do blackface again, but only because it’s so damn cheap to let other nations do it for us. –Sporting Blog, Last Angry Fan.

Australian sprinter Jana Rawlinson is removing her breast implants in order to improve her chances of qualifying for the Olympic team in 2012. Among other reasons…

“I absolutely loved having bigger boobs, but finally I’ve grown up enough to know myself; to be honest about who I am when I look in the mirror,” Rawlinson told the [Australian] Woman’s Day magazine.

“I don’t want to short-change Australia either — I want to feel the most athletic I can, to know that I’m standing on the track in London the fittest I can be.” –AFP.

Rawlinson, 26, made headlines about a month ago when she told Australian press that she was planning to reconcile with her 37-year-old estranged husband…as soon as their divorce is finalized. What a relief that at least the female athletes in Australia have been able to balance family and competition without any sort of turmoil. Oh, and uh…boobs.

Panda cupcakes from our own Amber Jones, via @berstreet.

The results from the extensive gender testing ordered for South African runner Caster Semenya have arrived. Semenya, who won the 800 meter run in track’s world championships as a female last month, is reportedly a hermaphrodite.

Semenya is claimed to have NO womb or ovaries — and has internal testes, the male sexual organs which produce testosterone.

The row over Semenya’s biology has caused huge divisions — with South African politicians calling slurs she is a man “racist and sexist.” Her birth certificate has the teen listed as female and urine tests showed that, despite her having higher than average male hormone levels, they are within the official limits for a woman. via.

It’s uncertain whether Semenya will lose her gold medal from Berlin, but it’s obvious that dressing up does absolutely nothing for this poor girl. Who would have thought that wearing so much jewelry could make somebody look like David Alan Grier? Read the rest of this entry »

Remember that world record that Usain Bolt set over the weekend in the 100, breaking a world record that he set in the Olympics? He just set another one, this time in the 200…again, breaking his own record. Bolt has run in five sprints, and won all five…each with another world record.

“Just coming out there, I’m just waiting for the lights to flash ‘game over,’ cause I felt like I was in a video game,” said Shawn Crawford, who finished fourth. “That guy was moving — fast.” via.

It’s only a matter of time before he gets popped for drugs, right? How can one guy be so quick for such a span of time…and then get FASTER month after month? So far, nobody’s accused Bolt of being a woman, which makes sense. It’s not like he’s scrubbing countertops or anything.

International track officials are asking South African sprinter Caster Semenya, who won gold at the women’s 800m event at the world championships in Berlin, “Semen in ya?” You can’t find humor like that anywhere else; maybe that’s a good thing. Anyway, some people think she’s a dude, especially after her vast improvement from a year ago. And, uh, her physique certain doesn’t help sway suspicion that she may be, in fact, a “he.”

The IAAF’s general secretary, Pierre Weiss, who replaced Semenya at the medallists’ news conference, said an investigation into her gender was under way in South Africa and Berlin, pointing out that the IAAF had allowed her to compete, giving her the benefit of the doubt.

“But one question is clear,” Weiss said. “If at the end of the investigation it is proven the athlete is not a female, we will withdraw the result of the competition today.” He added it could take weeks before a conclusion is reached. via.

The questions were flying after Semenya posted an 800m time 16 seconds better than her effort from last year. And even though she may have consumed a suite of performance enhancers during that time, I doubt that she grew a penis. That said, I wouldn’t put anything past those limey pricks in South Africa entering a male in a female event. If you can keep Nelson Mandela locked up for 200 years, what would stop you?