Ozzie Guillen said some bad things. It wasn’t the first time and it won’t be the last, but this one had a little more despot flattering than most, so it’s a big deal.

Of course, we at The Dugout believe in freedom of speech, so if Ozzie wants to say that Fidel Castro is better at skateboarding than Tony Hawk it should be his constitutional right as an American Sports Person Of Interest to do so. It should also be my right to explain why he said it in somewhat-antiquated chatroom form.

So here we are. The Ozzie Guillen Loves Fidel Castro Dugout is after the jump.

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Today is day two of The Dugout’s ‘Opening Days’, a celebratory maxi-series (maxi meaning “tampons”) that hopes to touch on every Major League team as MLB drags opening day out until July. Yesterday we took a look at the Tampa Bay Rays, and today we’ll visit the Pittsburgh Pirates, a young team that hopes to capitalize on the unexpected successes of last season with a focused, dedicated run toward the playoffs in 2012.

Just kidding, they’re the Pirates. Ah well, at least they appear in the strip this year, and I didn’t just have it be about Barry Bonds again. Note that today’s comic is based on an actual thing that happened.

Please enjoy today’s installment of Opening Days, and for any Pirates fans out there, I’ll see you in 365-ish days with next season’s strip.

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Baseball season is officially upon us, and that means only one thing — the return of The Dugout, the Internet’s longest running and most critically acclaimed webcomic about baseball players with pun screen names pretending to curse at each other over AIM. Yes, this is still a thing.

And to celebrate Major League Baseball splitting Opening Day up into like 40 smaller, less important games over the span of a month and at least one ceremony meant to humiliate Muhammad Ali, the normal Spring Training event we like to do has been replaced by Opening Days, a Dugout maxi-series that will span all 25 teams and let you find out what your favorite players are up to in 2012.

There are still only 25 teams, right? Well, 25 important ones. Or was that 5 important ones?

Anyway, whether it takes me a month or I’m still writing Opening Days segments into 2013, here’s episode one: The Tampa Bay Rays.

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