Chael Sonnen, on Jon Jones:

“I have friends on the card. I have fighters who and scratching and clawing their way through the undercard to the prelims, even the main card guys … their whole future depends on the check that they were gonna earn for doing their job next week. That’s all been taken away from them, because one selfish brat didn’t want to go in there and fight. You know, I just don’t understand it. I don’t understand how you could put yourself in front of the company and the industry. … He’s with Nike, Nike should change their motto with Jon Jones to ‘Just Do Nothing’.”

Jon Jones, on Chael Sonnen:

“The things you say about me hold absolutely no weight, you disrespected Anderson and his country but fought like a child. If you’re going to disrespect me out of nowhere, at least disrespect me to my face like a man. And you call me a punk, I’m more man than you’ll ever be. #Coward #Cheater. You’re not worth my time. Earn a title shot instead of trying to talk your way into one and I’ll be glad to hurt you.”

They’ve got a title fight set for April 27th and have been named as opposing coaches for the next season of ‘The Ultimate Fighter’. This is serious business, and shit’s about to go down. Here’s a picture of them palling around at Thanksgiving, taking cheesy holiday pictures.

Wait, what?

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Thanksgiving weekend is officially over, so now it’s time to get in the gym and work off all the gross shit you ate. I mean, you don’t have to do it NOW. You can wait until after Christmas. But eventually you’re going to look like one of the people in this workout fail compilation, and it’s going to be hilarious. (via Bob’s Blitz)

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Links

The 13 Images From Black Friday 2012 That Will Haunt Your Dreams |UPROXX|

Kenan Thompson Hates Kel Mitchell, Says Kel Mitchell |Warming Glow|

Memphis woman plans to marry a cardboard cutout of Edward Cullen |Film Drunk|

The Top 10 YouTube Comments For The Mark Sanchez Assface Fumble |With Leather|

Stealth Is For Losers: Check Out These Crazy ‘Dishonored’ Killing Sprees |Gamma Squad|

Harrison Barnes Presents The NBA Dunk Of The Year (So Far) |Smoking Section|

Fireman Ed: Missing in Action, Possibly Looking For A New Fandom |Kissing Suzy Kolber|

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So it turns out that Wild Turkey football-picking turkey Jimmy Junior is full of shit. On Wednesday, we shared the video of him picking the NFL’s Thanksgiving day games … he picked Detroit over Houston (Houston won 34-31 in overtime) and Dallas over Washington (Washington controlled the entire game and won 38-31). His only correct pick was New England over New York, and I don’t want to throw shade at a prognosticating animal, but Paul The Psychic Octopus could’ve called that one, and he’s dead.

I think I speak for everyone when I say the highlight of the Patriots/Jets game was Mark Sanchez running into his own lineman’s ass for no reason, fumbling the ball and giving up a touchdown. It was one of the most inexplicably pathetic things I’ve ever seen on a football field, including the time in 10th grade when I went out for a pass, got wide open, got too confident and tripped over my own feet about 20 yards ahead of the ball. At least I didn’t leave my faceprint in somebody’s buttcrack.

There isn’t a lot to be said that wasn’t covered in the KSK live thread for the game, so instead, here are my ten favorite YouTube comments from Ass Fumble-Gate.

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Lost in all the excitement of yesterday’s Thanksgiving NFL action that featured an overtime caused by a clusterf*ck and the New England Patriots reinforcing their pro-bullying agenda was the day’s lone college action between the No. 18 Texas Longhorns and the TCU Horned Frogs. TCU, of course, has been having a rather lackluster debut season in the Big 12, with a lousy 3-4 conference record heading into the game. But St. Thanksgiving and the turkey angels must have been looking down on the Frogs from their Mayflower in Valhalla – my grades always sucked in school – because TCU defeated Texas 20-13 to move to 7-4 overall on the season.

Anyway, I won’t bore you with any game details, because all you need to know is in that picture above. Is there anything more fun than when a team’s fans dress in costumes and then their team loses? I’m sure the answer to that is yes – Kate Upton topless, free filet mignons, topless Kate Upton serving free filet mignons, among others – but for the sake of right now, I just want to enjoy this.

But don’t worry, Texas fans. I also have a happy picture for you.

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One day I’m going to have a son – or if our God is a vengeful one, 6 daughters – and he will ask me in an adorable-but-eventually-manly voice, “Daddy, what does Thanksgiving mean?” And I’m going to look him straight in the eyes and tell him, “Visiting hours are over, thanks for the cigarettes.” But it’s a great question, that one that my imaginary son just asked. What does Thanksgiving even mean anymore?

It used to be a holiday that celebrated the first meal between the pilgrims that traveled to this country and the Native Americans that lived here, but we can’t be happy about that anymore because of the whole genocide thing. And at one time it was a celebration of family and friends coming together over a nice turkey dinner, but now we have national TV campaigns that are hellbent on making us feel like murderers for enjoying a piece of white meat. Hell, I’d love to say that it’s about celebrating America’s love of the NFL, but now we’re total a-holes if we cheer for a big hit because it may ruin a guy’s life.

Maybe that’s what we’re supposed to be most thankful for – the ability to make people feel miserable about everything. After all, what’s the point of spending hours in a farty plane or car only to end up with people who are going to nag you about your life decisions and ask you for money? But I’m a classic guy, who still believes in that old-fashioned meaning of Thanksgiving, so I’ve put together this gallery of the most Thanksgiving things that I could think of. I hope that it touches your hearts the way that it has touched the heart of the son I don’t have who was just visiting me in prison.

Happy Thanksgiving from With Leather.

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WWE’s YouTube page provides a lot of fresh videos for the Best And Worst Of Raw column — mostly of the “here’s the last 20 seconds of a match, and the five minutes of wacky shouting that came after it” persuasion — but occasionally they dip into the archives and share something truly magical.

That’s the case with this video of pretty much everyone who competed at Survivor Series ’89 celebrating Thanksgiving by saying what they’re thankful for. It’s one of the most 1980s pro wrestling things I’ve ever seen, and so heartwarming that I decided to put together a quick list of my ten favorite things that happen in it. I’m thankful for goofy nostalgia, the fact that pro wrestling coverage has septupled our traffic and that the Ultimate Warrior exists, and was once asked to talk about Thanksgiving.

So, in no particular order …

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