According to a series of escalating reports from TMZ, ex-NFL star Terrell Owens was rushed to a hospital late Thursday night after someone called 911 to report a medical emergency. He was released, but neither he nor his agent responded to TMZ’s calls … however, about 15 minutes ago TMZ posted a follow-up claiming that the “medical emergency” law enforcement agents responded to was “a possible prescription pill overdose”. And that’s where the story gets sad, and a little tricky.

As TMZ states:

T.O. was famously hospitalized back in 2006 — when he insisted he had a bad reaction to painkillers … despite reports that he tried to commit suicide by inhaling 35 Vicodin pills.

T.O. later held a news conference on the matter and stated, “The rumor of me taking 35 pills, I think is absurd. I don’t think I would be here if I had taken 35 pills.”

There’s a very good chance that TMZ is full of sh*t and that the “law enforcement agents” quoted in the story are fictional, but if the story ends up being as true as they want us to believe, two trips to the hospital for pain pill suicide attempts in five years is a big, waving red flag of concern for a player who hasn’t seemed to come to grips with his fading football importance. T.O. is a difficult guy to like, at least when it comes to the kind of like or dislike you give someone you watch play sports and ham it up on completely unnecessary celebreality shows, but all joking aside, I hope he can figure out what’s going on in his head and fix it.

If he went to the hospital for food poisoning or something and TMZ made it CAPITAL LETTERS DRAMATIC, I don’t know what to say, and would hope they’d get their heads fixed against a big rock.

DeSean Jackson was drafted in the second round of the 2008 NFL Draft by the Philadelphia Eagles, the seventh wide receiver taken in the draft, and in July of that year he agreed to terms on a four-year contract with the team. Two Pro Bowl selections later, Jackson is one of the best young wide-outs in the game and still working through a contract that only guarantees him $600,000 for the season. That’s about 600,000 times what I make in a year, but less (a lot less) than market value for a player of his ability. He’ll play his first game of the season on Sunday.

But, as I’m sure you’re asking yourself, what would Terrell Owens do?

T.O. talked to 97.5 The Fanatic in Philadelphia and gave one of the history’s most predictable answers when asked if he’d show up and play on Sunday were in DeSean Jackson’s situation. From Shutdown Corner, by way of Philadelphia Sports Daily:

“Absolutely not,” Owens replied. “I would have to better myself and my family and my situation. That’s ridiculous.”

Owens said that Jackson has obviously received advice “to go in there, be a man about it and play under the existing contract that he has,” adding, “but I guarantee you — if he goes out and gets hurt, God forbid, he’s not going to get the contract that he probably would have gotten if he held out.”

“These greedy athletes make too much money!” is a really terrible blogger talking point, much like “I have to provide for my family” is a terrible pro athlete talking point, so the truth falls somewhere in the middle — yes, DeSean Jackson is comparably worth more than what he’s being paid, but he signed a contract for x amount of years wherein he agreed upon his worth and no amount of crossing your arms and holding your breath should negate that. Otherwise, what’s the point of a contract? It’s not unique for me to say that holding out is an absolutely ass thing to do to your team, or that a player shouldn’t be able to say “I’m okay with you paying me this much to play well, oh hey look I played well, give me more money”, or that “functional, workable adult” would be a great way to socially support your family, but I will include all of them in this sentence anyway.

I think professional football players should look at T.O. as their game’s Donny Don’t. If the guy with great natural talent and lots of money who will live out the rest of his life as the “locker room poison guy who isn’t worth it” says you should do something, do the opposite. So, in this case, be a reliable, valued member of a pro sports organization, and the second that contract is up start demanding every dollar in history.

Trust me, I wanted to use that screen cap of her and McNulty from “The Wire”, but there are certain things I’m not allowed to do on this website. Uh, yet.

Sports

Terrell Owens Joins USA’s Necessary Roughness - I can’t wait to hear “NFL great Terrell Owens guest stars on an all new Necessary Roughness! USA, characters welcome!” between two Twix commercials during every single break on Monday Night Raw. [AOL TV]

Fantasy Football Goes Hollywood: The KSK Sex/Fantasy Mailbag - HONESTY: “I’m glad we’re exclusive, because you’re the only person I want to be with.” DISCLOSURE: “Now that we’re exclusive, here is a list detailing which of my friends have ejaculated in my mouth.” [Kissing Suzy Kolber]

MMA Movie Alert: Think The Karate Kid But With An Autistic Cage Fighter - Honestly, that’s sorta how I think about The Karate Kid already. Remember in the 80s when there were suddenly 15 movies about pro wrestling, and none of them got any better than No Holds Barred? Yep, that’s what we’re doing again. [Cage Potato]

Epic ACW Queen of Queens Tournament 2011 Pics By Bowie Ibarra - Included here for three reasons: (1) Bowie is a cool guy, so I want to throw him some love, (2) I love my Anarchy Championship Wrestling dearly, and (3) I make a cameo appearance, and yes, it is part of my continuing efforts to make Portia Perez like me. [Zombie Blood Fights]

With Leather

Redneck Olympics Vs. The U.S. Olympic Committee - I’m going to be honest, that trashy girl on the left probably #cangetit. I have weird standards where my girlfriend is sophisticated and gorgeous, but inner 14-year old me thinks these hillbilly girls and their 3-year window of hotness before they turn into toothless, tattooed monsters makes them desirable. Stupid rural upbringing. [With Leather]

Reggie Bush Is Pretty Sad About Losing Everything - I’m not sure what I’d say in even one text message to Kim Kardashian. “Hey, I’ve seen your show, I don’t like it. Your butt is big, write me back.” Okay, so I know exactly what I’d say. [With Leather]

@Storytime: Pat Hanlon Loses His Goddamn Mind - Don’t sleep on this edition of @Storytime, wherein a grown adult man retweets everyone in the world and adds “kiss my ass, butthole!” before it. Update: It is Friday, and the sun is still shining. But I’m in Texas, so I don’t know what’s going on over there. [With Leather]

The Chickbusters In Hipster Glasses - It’s a link to yesterday’s morning links, sure, but that picture of Kaitlyn in wayfarers is going to stay with me for weeks. [With Leather]

Not Sports

Deal With It GIFs: Pop Culture Edition - Deal With It GIFs are the best way to end a conversation, because they go in one ear and out the other like you posted blank space. Additionally, why do we live in a world where animated pictures are important to conversations? [UPROXX]

Flowmotion: 33 Rapid Fire Rap Songs - “Now we know y’all be lovin’ this … right here, L-I-M-P, Bizkit is right here. People in the house put them hands in the air, cause if you don’t care, then we don’t care!” – author unknown |Smoking Section|

15 Scariest Photos of Steven Tyler - Also acceptable, “all photos of Steven Tyler”. Why can’t we do the 15 best pictures of Liv Tyler, or better still, Mia? [Unreality]

Woman Can’t Stop Eating Dead Husband - Headlines that work. [Warming Glow]

I wish I was half as good at anything as Terrell Owens thinks he is at life. The wideout failed to amass 1,000 yards receiving for the second consecutive season, but the 37-year-old has never been one to let facts get in the way of a good boasting, whether it’s regarding football or his plans for when his playing days are over.

“I’ll be in Hollywood on the big screen,” he told FOX411′s Pop Tarts at the Grey Goose Lounge Super Bowl soiree in Dallas, TX last weekend. “I did a comedy this past summer called ‘Dysfunctional Friends’ (co-starring Stacey Dash and Stacy Keibler) with a great cast, hopefully that’s a stepping stone for more work.”[..]

But before leaving the NFL for the bright lights of Hollywood, Owens has one important goal. In true T.O style, he wants to switch teams (again) to one that “will actually win the Super Bowl.”

–Fox News, via Ben Maller.

Terrell Owens will never play on a Super Bowl team, because you are a pompous ass that has yet to realize that the game has passed you by, and any decent organization with a shot at postseason glory will pass on you because you’re locker room cancer. And yet you come out of Buffalo and Cincinnati — unquestionably the two most poorly-run organizations in the NFL — thinking that you smell sweeter than a rose. I wish you’d think about some less egotistical career options, Terrell. Like “Foreign news correspondent in Egypt,” perhaps.

Cincinnati Bengals wide receiver Terrell Owens finally weighed in on this Donovan McNabb business. McNabb’s coach, Mike Shanahan, has blamed everything from McNabb’s hamstring to his cardiovascular endurance. Owens, while speaking on his weekly TV show on that one network, cut to the chase much more effectively. Remember that Owens and McNabb were teammates for two years with the Philadelphia Eagles, where they studied together at the Andy Reid School Of Clock Management.

“Well, I don’t really want to start anything, but I did play in the Super Bowl and there were rumors where he couldn’t get our two-minute offense going at the end of the game,” Owens said. “I’m just saying.” [..]

“He’s the head coach, so it has to make sense,” said Owens, who has complained that the Bengals aren’t paying attention to his suggestions for the offense. “Well, this is a situation where Mike Shanahan, he sees these two quarterbacks on an everyday basis. … So he’s had a chance to observe.”

Someone needs to explain to me how “There were rumors of…” means anything other than “I saw, but am too chicken sh-t to say personally…” It’s a fact that McNabb couldn’t hurry up the team in Super Bowl XXXIX. I’m relieved that at least someone else can see that and not cry “racism.” Maybe McNabb should start doing situps in his driveway during his upcoming bye week.

Cincinnati Bengals wideouts Chad Ocho Cinco and that one guy who drops a lot of balls are talking about doing a TV show. During the season. I know that Terrell Owens needs the money, but Chad? It’s almost like he has this insatiable craving for attention.

“The T.Ocho Show” will be more than just a football show. Already reality-TV stars, media celebrities, and crossover personalities of American pop culture, T.O. and OchoCinco will look at the best and worst of Twitter, the most memorable moments from both players’ VH1 reality shows, and many other topics–from Kim Kardashian’s dating habits to Rex Ryan’s eating habits.
“This is coming from the perspective of two professionals. We play the game, we live the game, and viewers will get to live it through us week-in and week-out,” said Chad OchoCinco. “Versus is taking a big risk giving us this show. It’s gonna be dangerous. Watch with care.” Release, via Press Coverage.

Whatever. It’s not like those guys can’t get a crew to shoot around their football schedules. Of course, if they ruin my Bengals’ run at another division title, I will hate them for it. So I guess my stand is “good for them.” At least, until it’s not good for me. I just wonder if they’ll let Carson Palmer play the gay neighbor on the show. He seems cut out for that.