New career goal: get name-dropped in a Taiwan Animation video.

With the exception of WWE doing a Lennay Kekua/Little Jimmy joke on Monday, the most predictable thing to come from the reaction to Deadspin’s Manti Te’o I LOVE MUH DEAD GIRLFRIEND story is the response from Next Media Animation. Sometimes life lobs a ball in their direction, and it’s their job to do a bunch of peyote and slam it home. They don’t disappoint here, covering Te’o's troubles with butt-chugging leprechauns, in-game mech attacks and what may or may not be a necrophilia joke.

Thanks for doing what you do, Taiwan. I’d be down for an entire series of these, especially if they involve more scenes of fictional characters pouring whisky up this poor guy’s butthole.

Here’s the NMA World Edition (Taiwan Animation) take on Bob Costas and his speech about Jovan Belcher and gun control. Unsurprisingly, it features shotgun blasts to the television, Costas punching football fans with a giant God-fist, and hockey players bursting into tears. Okay, kinda surprisingly.

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Links

A Brief Tribute To Britta Perry’s Inspirational ‘Me So Christmas’ Song And Dance |UPROXX|

Anchorman 2 News: Kristen Wiig to play Brick Tamland’s lamp interest |Film Drunk|

A Very Helpful Guide To Every On-Screen Death On ‘The Walking Dead’ |Warming Glow|

The Nolan Ryan Robin Venture Fight, Now In 8-Bits |With Leather|

Peter Jackson And Warner Respond to ‘The Hobbit’ Barfgate (Plus New Footage) |Gamma Squad|

A Paula Patton Appreciation Post |Smoking Section|

Roger Goodell’s TIME Cover, Fixed |Kissing Suzy Kolber|

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I considered writing my normal wordy intro paragraph about how Taiwan Animation is the weirdest thing in the world, citing examples from the stories we’ve covered and wondering how two Taiwanese ladies with 3rd grade computer animation skills could get to the heart of a story better than a nation of aged sports reporters, but I’ll let this image do all that for me:

Additional highlights, if you aren’t already watching, include:

- Phil Jackson as the zen, levitating version of The Mandarin from ‘Iron Man’
- A swinging jazz soundtrack
- The Lakers having fruit thrown at them because they’re trying to play basketball with walkers (try to figure out which one’s supposed to be Steve Nash!)
- Slow motion fruit explosions
- Player-on-fan violence

They really got their money’s worth out of that “bus backing up” noise.

If that preview image doesn’t make you click the link, maybe this will: at one point in Taiwan’s “New York Yankees didn’t make the World Series” epic, Alex Rodriguez draws a sex emoticon on a ball and gets it tossed to a lady. Yep.

- Follow us on Twitter @withleather
- Follow me personally @MrBrandonStroud and Burnsy @MayorBurnsy
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Links

Here Are 15 ‘Adorable’ Halloween Costumes For Kids That Are Actually Quite Horrifying |UPROXX|

‘SNL’ Recap: Bruno Mars (And Tom Hanks) |Warming Glow|

Holy Sh*t. Nic Cage in talks to star in a Left Behind reboot. |Film Drunk|

Excessive GIF Theater: How To React To Christian Ponder Dating Samantha Steele |With Leather|

Five Historical Eras The Assassin’s Creed Franchise Should Explore Next |Gamma Squad|

8 Ways Beyonce Could Pay Homage To New Orleans During The Super Bowl Halftime Show |Smoking Section|

Pizza Bloody Mary: Football Foodie Brunch Cocktails |Kissing Suzy Kolber|

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Soccer dives are the worst, and Luis Suarez of Liverpool is the worst AT them. Here, Taiwan’s Next Media Animation accuses him of watching Bambi for helplessness research and runs a steamroller over him. Seems reasonable. (via NMA)

- Follow us on Twitter @withleather
- Follow me personally @MrBrandonStroud and Burnsy @MayorBurnsy
- Like us on Facebook.

Links

Mila Kunis Is Not A Fan Of The Internet |UPROXX|

David Cross And Amber Tamblyn Had The Most Charmingly Perfect Wedding Ever |Warming Glow|

The Looper Timeline Infographic |Film Drunk|

Here’s A Painting Of Larry Bird And Skeletor |With Leather|

Ms. Marvel May Be In ‘The Avengers 2′. Here’s Who May Be Playing Her |Gamma Squad|

10 Great Soundtracks From Terrible Movies |Smoking Section|

Dan Shaughnessy Isn’t Even Good At Trolling |Kissing Suzy Kolber|

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Taiwan’s Next Media Animation has really gone above and beyond with their latest effort, calmly titled, “New York Yankees 2012 season goes off the rails”. Taiwan Animation generally sticks to recapping major stories with a keen sarcastic eye for the absurdity of truth, but now they’re in the predictions game, and that game includes saying C.C. Sabathia has gained so much weight that whenever he goes to the beach “Greenpeace tries to drag his ass back into the water”. They are not playing around.

I hate the Yankees as much as the next guy, but no part of “tied for first in the AL East with the Baltimore Orioles” necessitates the entire New York infield playing with the aid of walkers or calling Derek Jeter an “overrated singles slapper”. I don’t know if these things are written by committee or just by random dudes on the Internet approached by violent strangers in pig masks a la the Saw movie franchise, but man, this is extra harsh. Consider that Tampa is five games back on September 17 and … wait, am I trying to rationalize this with stats? F**k New York and their pirate ship adventures.

If New York wins the division, I’ll expect a full retraction from Next Media Animation. I also expect it to be bat-shit insane.