I’ve never quite understood why companies still pay upwards of $3.5 million for Super Bowl ad spots. I mean, back in the 90s and early 00s I can understand why they did, and I’m glad they did because most Super Bowl commercials provide much needed entertainment during breaks in play. After all, that entertainment sure as hell ain’t coming from a halftime show.

But today’s Super Bowl commercial is almost a lesson in futility. For starters, people watching in bars or at Super Bowl parties can’t even hear them, so the spots and money are essentially wasted. Hell, half the time I’m too busy trying to explain to people how their squares work or scoring ridiculous prop bet sheets. And with the Internet, YouTube and 6 zillion blogs ready to pounce, almost every commercial is leaked before the big game anyway.

First up, this Volkswagen ad that found its way to the intertunnels this week. The company is referring to it as a teaser ad, or an ad for an ad, but whatever it is, it’s fantastic – simple, funny, dogs. It has nothing to do with actually purchasing, owning or driving a Volkswagen, and why should it? Give me dogs barking the Star Wars theme and I’m going to at least consider buying your product.

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The USA Today is now the clear frontrunner for the 2012 Happiest Story of the Year award, with today’s report that Skechers has dropped Kim Kardashian from its Super Bowl ad in favor of a French bulldog. The ad will also feature Mark Cuban, but the main point is that we’re finally taking a step in the right direction, not only by realizing that all Super Bowl ads should feature adorable dogs, but by kicking Kardashian’s well-insured butt to the curb.

Unfortunately, this isn’t a social statement. It’s just business.

“Kim got us more attention than we ever dreamed,” says Leonard Armato, president of Skechers Fitness, who notes that Skechers is launching a high-tech running shoe business. “We have to establish Skechers as more than a lifestyle company.”

Also, Kardashian’s contract with Skechers expired at the end of 2011, so the company is probably trying to save some cash as it drops $3 million on the Super Bowl spot. In case you’re unfamiliar, Kardashian was one of the spokespersons for Skechers’ Shape-Ups, the shoes that are supposed to help women get in shape just by walking around, but have since become the focus of a class action lawsuit alleging that the shoes cause hip injuries.

Geez, at least Reebok got Kelly Brook to shill for its fake workout shoes.

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