Cars are sports, right? They have to be, if they’re backflipping.

Image CPR described this as “the world’s first 360-degree backflip in a car,” and while I’m not sure that’s totally accurate (especially since the car is more like a monster truck than a car, and monster trucks are always flipping), it’s still a guy ramping and backflipping and landing on a gigantic snow incline, so that’s worth watching.

Also worth experiencing are the YouTube comments, because of course they are. Here are my two favorite, juxtaposed for effect.

Conservation of momentum using the engine (if transversely mounted) or rear drivetrain as a counterweight. Accelerating while the car is in the air will cause the counterweight and the car to “push off” of each other. The vast mass differential means they have to rev up pretty high to get any meaningful effect.

For the hearing impared: “vroooooooomvrrrvvroooooom VRrrrrVRRRRRdodododododoDrrrvr­roooooom”

I can’t wait until we learn how to do this without a ramp. Or, I don’t know, we teach the backflipping car how to turn into a robot guy in the middle and shoot a bunch of enemies with a cannon.

I liked football better back when I thought it was real.

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5 Reasons The New DC Logo Is Awful, Awful, Awful - Is comics the only industry where the only way to succeed is to systematically ruin and re-ruin and re-ruin everything halfway decent the people who had the job before you did? Marvel’s new logo should just be Walmart’s. [Gamma Squad]

10 Reasons To Shop At Wal-Mart - Reason 11: those 25 dollar WWE DVDs get dropped down to 5 bucks and tossed in the discount bin whenever they retire or get released. Oh hai Edge DVD! [Buzzfeed]

Hazel Jones’s Two Vaginas Are Freely Available On YouTube - Thank goodness! If they aren’t going to release seasons of Hazels Jones’s Two Vaginas on DVD, at least I get to watch it somewhere. [Film Drunk]

Cable TV Is Full of Liars - As if those infomercials where the people try to grab bread or whatever in black and white and get hurt and get a big red X over their faces weren’t enough of a clue. [Warming Glow]

Kevin Love’s Game Winning Three Breaks The Clippers 101-98 - More importantly, which celebrities watched it happen? [Smoking Section]

A Premature Tribute To Paul Rudd’s Bobby Newport - Bobby Newport. Bobby Newport. Bobby, Newport. Bobby. Bobby. [UPROXX]

9 Funny Tourist Photobombs - HuffPost Comedy, for when you want to read Cracked.com but wish it was written by job-stealing robots. [HuffPost Comedy]

Man Sues Rupert Murdoch For Defaming Him Through ‘Donnie Darko’ and ‘The X-Files’ - I should sue him for defaming me through ‘Bob’s Burgers’. [The FW]

The 10 Least Plausible Movie Stunts Ever. Complete With SOPA-unfriendly Videos - That horse powersliding under a truck had better be on here somewhere. Also, Jessica Alba hurting someone with a punch ever. [FARK]

Five Movies where One Actor has Five or More Roles - It’s pretty sad when these lists go up, and Alec Guinness and Peter Sellers get lumped into the talent pool with post-Crisis Eddie Murphy. Yes, Kind Hearts And Coronets is just like The Klumps. [Unreality]

Redesigns of Classic Hip-Hop Album Covers - Someone should redesign every album Nas has made since Illmatic so he can be as cool and good as he’s supposed to be. Also, redesign Nicki Minaj by turning her into a giant pink blur, plz. [High Definite]

Normally I leave the television you can write about without expressed, written consent to Warming Glow, but the first episode of ‘StuntBusters’ debuts Tuesday night on Speed and I felt it contained the right amounts of things exploding and women in heels surfing the hoods of cars to justify itself as a sports recommendation.

If the headline synopsis didn’t do it for you, perhaps the hilariously-direct “viewers can expect to see us blowin’ up cars” in the clip will win you over. Worst case scenario, you’ll watch it and go “oh wow who is this blonde lady” and google “Vanessa Vander Pluym” for the next forty minutes*.

A quick synopsis from the official website:

Stuntbusters is going to explore and explode motoring myths as we reveal the facts and figures behind the latest, fastest and hottest automotive technology on earth! Join our two fearless human crash test dummy stunt drivers, Garrett Hammond and Vanessa Vander Pluym, as they take it to the redline and beyond using our high-tech test lab equipped with cutting edge automotive technology and eye-popping graphic interfaces. Each high-octane experiment will be captured at one thousand frames per second; allowing us to slow the action down and dive into the physics behind the vehicular carnage!

I have it on good review-copy authority that future episodes of the show feature men on fire, people shooting guns at cars to make them explode (for science!) and a standard 99% chance of someone blowing something up and walking away from it without looking back. For science. I know that sometimes I walk a progressive line with this blog, but I hope we never get to the point where beautiful people firing rifles into gas tanks becomes a thing we don’t want to see.

For archiving reasons I am re-purposing this website as a chart for all the times this show makes me go “oh sh*t” at my television.

*She played Stacy in the ‘Parks and Recreation’ episode ‘The Banquet’!

… or, “seven minutes in Texas”.

By way of my Facebook friendship with With Leather legend Josh Zerkle comes the story of a Texas family’s attempts to jump a small ramp on bikes that I can say without hyperbole is worth every second of its 6-minute, 58-seconds run-time.

Listing off the funniest parts of the video is like trying to explain the plot of Duck Soup. Hot Rod Lincoln and the Keystone Cowboy. Keystone Cowboy wearing a “reggalah oh oven mitt” because he couldn’t find his other glove. The fact that it’s “Daredevils take two“. “Aw lawd Hot Rod Lincoln”. Hot Rod lying on the ground hurt for like a minute and a half while his Mom taunts him, only to making lurid jacking-off motions to her. The dog who threatens to take a sh*t in the middle of the proceedings. Keystone Cowboy’s aborted backflip. Hot Rod only being able to communicate via WWE hand gestures. “Mawma LOOK Mawma LOOK Mawma LOOK”. “Speedy” being quiet the entire video and riding his bike over the ramp like it was nothing. At some point I expected Chico to wander onscreen in a Texas Longhorns shirt to make it even more absurd.

I probably live down the street from these guys.

[h/t to Chloe Alexander Reuland]

Hi. This is uh, David Smith, senior. And he is the humannnn … home run. Or the human cannonball. /awkward smile

69-year old “Cannonball” Smith turning himself into a human home run between games of a doubleheader between the Connecticut Tigers and Lowell Spinners on Tuesday, making him the first old man to fly over a minor league fence since the Norfolk Tides manager Gary Allenson went climbing out of spite last month. Smith’s trip was much more dignified, which is funny when you consider he was dressed like an American flag and being shot out of a cannon.

I miss the good old days when you had to actually do something ridiculous like this as a trade if you wanted to be famous for doing something dumb. The very best part of this story isn’t a senior citizen flying to his death on some rural hill, it’s the reverse angle video (after the jump) where you find out he preps for flight with Rick Derringer’s (and more important, Hulk Hogan’s) “Real American”. I’m glad he’s using it, too, because being a human home run is way more American than bodyslamming a fat guy from France.

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Sure, last night we got Danny Way clipping his ankle on the ramp, but it doesn't hold up to someone doing a 46-foot freefall after losing control of their board like last year. Therefore the X-Games are thus far a miserable failure bereft of needed schadenfreude. We got you covered, those out there with a thirst for blood or, failing that, painful looking plummets.

Damn, guy, didn't you learn anything from The Simpsons Movie? That should never to pay to see in theatres what you can watch online at home for free? No, the other lesson. The one where you have to speed up as you're hitting the top of the loop.