In boring NBA news, the Indiana Pacers defeated the Golden State Warriors 108-97 last night, and the most shocking thing about that game should have been that both the Pacers and Warriors are in the thick of the playoff hunt. Of course, the Pacers have it much easier, as they’re currently in second place in the Eastern Conference, 8 games ahead of the 8th seed Milwaukee Bucks, while the Warriors are clinging to a small lead over the Utah Jazz and Houston Rockets for the 6th seed, so they need every win they can get.

But we don’t give a crap about any of that because FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT!!! With 6 minutes left in the game, Warriors forward David Lee and disgruntled former Entertainment 720 employee Roy Hibbert got into a heated shoving match. Somewhere, the scrapper formerly known as Ron Artest just shook his head and frowned.

Then everyone else got involved and the Pacers fans shouted a collective, “Why, I never!” What a terrible thing to happen on free monocle night.

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Stephen Curry, the NCAA’s leading scorer, had a rough night from the field but found his groove in time to lead #23 Davidson past West Virginia in the Jimmy V Classic at Madison Square Garden.  Curry missed 12 of his first 13 three-point attempts, but heated up over the final five minutes, scoring 13 of Davidson’s final 15 points to finish with 27 in the 68-65 win.

Hmmm, looks like that whole “dominating the NCAA tournament” thing last spring wasn’t a fluke for Curry.  I guess I should probably learn where Davidson is one of these days.  **Googles Davidson** Huh.  North Carolina.  The Wildcats.  Learn something new every day.

NBA – It was apparently the best night of the NBA season so far. I may or may not have missed it entirely.  Whoops.

MLB – BREAKING!  CC Sabathia is reportedly signing a 7-year, $160M deal with the Yankees.  I don’t understand why it’s a big deal that this is breaking news.  Nobody else was going to pay that much, so it’s not a surprise.  And the season still doesn’t start until April.  So please pardon my dismissive wanking motion.

The only time it’s good to be bombarded with shitloads of basketball games is March Madness.  If I’m not gambling on teams being eliminated from a championship tournament, I really don’t need non-stop tip-off coverage.

But yeah, college basketball season is here.  **makes wanking motion** I guess the big game last night (“big” being two ranked teams and not a blowout) was Oklahoma-Davidson.  Stephen Curry picked up where he left off last spring, going off for 44 points while rallying his team from a 21-point deficit, but Blake Griffin (25 points, 21 rebounds, pictured looking retarded) and the Sooners held out for a win in Norman, 82-78.

My God, that was exhausting to write.  No chance of me doing that again.  Here’s the rest of the scoreboard.

Oh no.  And there were ten NBA games last night, too?  Listen people, I’m just one man.  One man who doesn’t care.  You should probably go elsewhere for the basketball recaps.