A man was arrested for indecent exposure (is there another kind?) in a Santa Barbara City College parking lot after a softball player saw him masturbating in his car with his shorts down.  This should be good.

Paper towels, moisturizer and a “Barely Legal” pornography magazine were three pieces of the incriminating evidence police used to arrest a man for masturbating in a City College parking lot [facing the stadium] …

The suspect [not pictured] confessed to [Security Supervisor Eric] Fricke that this was his first time doing anything like this. He also told Fricke that he couldn’t do it at home because he has roommates, according to the report.

His first time masturbating?  Or his first time masturbating in public?  No, he probably meant it was his first time masturbating in that specific parking spot.  At that time of day.  With that particular brand of lotion.  “Officer, this isn’t like me!  I usually use ‘Black Tail’!”

[Busted Coverage / Deadspin]

Future home of asshole fans

Despite being richer than pharaohs, the Yankees have saddled the city of New York with more than twice as much money as the city agreed to chip in for the new Yankee Stadium.

Skyrocketing expenses at the new Yankee Stadium will saddle taxpayers with a $325 million bill – more than twice the amount the city approved in 2006.

City Controller William Thompson blamed either “incompetence” or “blatant attempts to mislead the public” for poor initial estimates of costs for demolishing the old stadium, replacing some parks and street improvements. The original price tag was $129 million.

“Costs don’t go up that dramatically in that period of time,” he said. “Either someone did that intentionally or it is the worst job of management that I have ever seen.”

The Yankees are saying that the revenues the city get back will more than blah blah blah.  That’s what I get out of articles that talk about politics at the city level.  I see “comptroller” and my eyes start to glaze over.  The thing to take away from this story is the answer to the question, “Should I hate the Yankees?”  And the answer is “only if you love America.”

The city of Seattle has approved a request to open a Deja Vu strip club across the street from Safeco Field, despite the Mariners’ attempt to block it.  High five!

[The club] would be just 400 feet away from Safeco Field — the same distance as home plate is from the center field wall.

The Mariners asked the city to reconsider, calling for further interpretation of the city code passed last year which bans strip clubs from within 800 feet of community centers, parks and schools…

The Mariners also argued that some open areas adjacent to the stadium are included on a list of “neighborhood parks, open space, recreational features and public-private open spaces” in the Downtown Planning Study Final Environmental Impact Statement.

Here’s a list of things adjacent to Safeco Field: Qwest Field, the Pyramid Brewery, train tracks, parking lots, industrial wharves, and various signs of urban blight.  It’s precisely the kind of neighborhood where strip clubs are ALWAYS located.  Thematically, Deja Vu’s got more of a right to be there than Safeco.

[Lion in Oil]