Back in December, we brought you the horrifying news that 2011 With Leather Celebrity Sports Fan of the Year and Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue cover model Kate Upton was rumored to be dating New York Jets quarterback Mark Sanchez. And it all made sense – Upton’s sister works for the Jets so she gets Kate free tickets to games and Sanchez can’t get enough of teenage girls.

Of course, other rumors have come and gone – Sanchez and Kim Kardashian, Upton and Tim Tebow, Sanchez and Kirstie Alley, Upton and me. For the sake of disclosure, I may have made two of those up right now. However, this 4-month old rumor was seemingly laid to rest, but that didn’t stop Ellen DeGeneres from digging up the corpse on her show yesterday.

Meanwhile, Upton is staying coy over a reported romance with American football player Mark Sanchez.

When questioned about the New York Jets player on the Ellen DeGeneres Show, she conceded he was ‘cute’.

She said: ‘Yeah, he is cute. I’ve met him. My sister works for the Jets. And she’s been working there for four years. So, I went to all the games.

‘I met him briefly.’ (Via the Daily Mail)

Obviously we can all smell the bullsh*t a mile away, as if it’s a delightful lilac and cinnamon fragrance, or what I imagine Upton’s hair smells like when she’s asleep. But I appreciate With Leather’s First Lady for carrying on this discretion for the sake of us dorks.

Oh by the way, did you know that Upton is the new face of Skullcandy earphones? It’s true, and she helped advertise them in the best way possible – by wearing very little.

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Homegirl with the sleeves has no idea how lucky she is.

With Leather’s 2011 Celebrity Fan of the Year and, much less importantly, Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue cover model Kate Upton is down in Mexico City for the Liverpool Fashion Fest, and that seems strange to me, because when I think of Liverpool I imagine England, and when I think of Mexico I think of the exact opposite of fashion. But hey, who am I to argue?

Upton appeared at the Liverpool Interlomas Department Store yesterday, and I don’t know why exactly – other than she’s KATE-F*CKING-UPTON and she can do whatever she wants – so I’m going to assume that she’s on a global tour to show everyone how hot they should be. That’s why she took a moment to pose with these Mexican girls and give all girls hope that one day they too can be perfect.

Spoiler alert: Nope.

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Before this morning, Muse magazine greatest contribution to my life had been Lindsay Lohan’s greasy hipster freckles and cigarette orgy photoshoot. Also before this morning, the best thing a phony Marilyn Monroe spread had contributed was … well, every other Lindsay Lohan photoshoot.

This morning, everything changed.

Behold, Sports Illustrated swimsuit model and With Leather cultural icon Kate f’ing Upton channeling Marilyn Monroe (and a heavy dose of retro eyebrows) in Muse. In the process, she finds a way to wear less than a swimsuit and complete the artsiest spread she’s pulled outside of a pair of Guess jeans.

We’re about a month from Terry Richardson stumbling upon a pic and deciding to shoot her against stark white with eight garden hoses spraying her in the face. Enjoy Art Kate while you can. (And click the pics to make them as big as I could find.)

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I’m pretty sure that if I somehow ended up in the same elevator as Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue cover model Kate Upton I probably wouldn’t be able to say much more than, “HELLO PRETTY LADY!” before I pissed my pants and fainted, so forgive me if the thought of waiting at the airport in a crowd of dudes is a bit nonsensical to me. But that’s the life of our favorite 19-year old model now that she’s a full blown star, and she’s hopping from airport to airport only to fight through crowds of epic douche.

The folks at Hollywood Star Gossip were on hand at Upton’s recent arrival in Los Angeles, and they caught Upton’s fans on camera as they waved magazines and demanded autographs while probably scaring the crap out of her. During the mild chaos, one of the guy’s yells, “I’ve been waiting here all day” and call me old-fashioned, but shouldn’t that get the guy on some sort of potential stalker list?

See for yourself…

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Since being named the cover model for the 2012 Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue, With Leather’s favorite superdupermodel Kate Upton has finally become a household name. No longer reserved to the dreams of bloggers and their pervert uncles, the 19-year old Florida native (call me!) spent her Monday and Tuesday on a whirlwind TV tour, starting with the official reveal (sort of) of her new cover on the Late Show with David Letterman, and including a stop by the Today Show and one especially hilarious visit to CNBC’s Power Lunch, on which she awesomely humiliated Darren Rovell. And here I thought we couldn’t love her more.

But there were also plenty of TV and media personalities who either didn’t think to send in an interview request for Upton or just felt like it was much easier to tear her down now that she’s been built up without her actually being there to defend herself. Enter: Bill O’Reilly, who discussed Upton’s rise to fame last night on The O’Reilly Factor with a marketing expert and another angry woman. And if you’re wondering if O’Reilly came across as clueless while using out-of-context TV clips and information to support his claims, watch for yourself.

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Speculation had been swirling for the past week or so about the identity of this year’s Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue cover model, and all signs justifiably pointed to our favorite 19-year old supermodel Knicks fan, Kate Upton, earning the honor. After all, she was mentioned no less than 764,872,358,725,361 times on this website in 2011, and I’m pretty sure that’s the top priority that SI uses when choosing each cover model. Also, it didn’t hurt that multiple online gossip sites had leaked the Upton news days ago, but we’re going to pretend like we didn’t know so we don’t look like morons wearing only these party hats over our crotches.

As for Upton, she couldn’t be happier, and I’m not basing that on her smile, because my binoculars broke yesterday. Instead, I’m just going by this quote from People Magazine:

“In the beginning you’re pretty relaxed, you’re not thinking of new poses and it just feels really natural at that point,” she says. “At Sports Illustrated everyone’s so nice and it’s like a family, you don’t really think too much into it. I just have a lot of fun and be myself. It just comes so naturally.”

Upton’s cover was officially revealed on the Late Show with David Letterman last night, but it was reported that a shipment of the magazines was delivered to a gas station in Michigan early. That gas station? Shangri-La.

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