Justice Is Served: Ryan Braun Left Out Of 2013 ‘Nice Jewish Guys’ Calendar

Written by Ashley Burns / 12.07.12

Last year, Milwaukee Brewers left fielder Ryan Braun tested positive for an abnormally high level of testosterone and he was subsequently suspended for 50 games under Major League Baseball’s strict PED policies. But then a funny thing happened along the way to the laboratory – Braun’s urine samples were mishandled, rendering the league’s entire case against him moot on a technicality, and Braun’s suspension was lifted. The system that commissioner Bud Selig has relied on heavily to bandage the deep wounds of public perception caused by decades of drug abuse and league indifference had been defeated.

We’ll never know whether or not Braun was actually guilty of using PEDs, because if he did, then he’d presumably be wise enough to never use them again; if he didn’t, then obviously he wouldn’t suddenly start using them. But sports fans don’t operate under the same “innocent until proven guilty” mentality that supposedly serves as the core of the American justice system. Brewers fans continue to stand behind their star slugger, while non-Brewers fans will always label Braun a juicer.

And yes, there is no point in this recap of Braun’s tainted 2012, other than I really wanted to post this “Nice Jewish Guys” calendar and Braun’s the first guy I think of when someone mentions Jewish athletes. It used to be Robbie Gould, but it turns out that he’s not Jewish. I lost so many good jokes because of that revelation.

While it’s no Sexy Football Managers, and certainly not a Kelly Brook celebration of cleavage, “Nice Jewish Guys” is one of the more enjoyable novelty calendars you’ll see this week. At least your mother will like it.

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I HATE THIS AND YOU SHOULD TOO

Written by Matt / 11.18.08

The holiday season is nearly upon us, which means it’s time for bloggers to start digging up inane sports-related gifts.  And an early award for this has to go to Big League Stew, which discovered Cole & Mason’s King Pepper Baseball Bat Mill.  For that baseball fan who needs enough fresh ground pepper to cover an entire barbecued elephant carcass.

Product Features

  • King Pepper has 2 1/2 feet of pure pepper grinding power
  • Actual size of a baseball bat

What an amazing gift.  “Oh, thank you honey!  A pepper grinder.  That looks like a baseball bat.  No, I love it.  This is great.  Every time I use a regular pepper mill I get frustrated that it isn’t two feet longer and too large to keep on the table.  It’s perfect.”

At 72 cm in length, the King Pepper Baseball bat mill is literally the size of a real life baseball bat! However, it is only bound for the table with a design registered stainless steel grinding mechanism with a lifetime guarantee – so not one for the rounders or baseball pitch!

It’s not suited for baseball, but it’s perfect for a game of PEPPER!!!  **murders litter of puppies**

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