son of a

The thing you are probably trying to look away from is Mark Hominick, an Ultimate Fighter who got a $129,000 Fight of the Night bonus on Sunday for letting Jose Aldo ruthlessly beat him in the face until his eyeballs started looking like little vaginas. I imagined the post-match stuff to be mostly Hominick limping out through the back door of the arena and collapsing into a big pile of trashcans, but apparently he was fine enough to head home and tweet about the fight.

I am fine, little swollen (of course) but hungry to go back, get stronger and build back!

He didn’t make any mention of how Aldo beat him until he looked like that one mutant from “Futurama.”

[via Hot Clicks]

We deliver your college baseball post for 2009 on the heels of one public university in Columbus, Ohio being pummeled by Florida State as the Seminoles advanced to their super regional yesterday. And we could spend the rest of this post quoting the ridiculous stat lines that came out of this game:

• Florida State shortstop Stephen Cardullo went 7-for-9 with 5 RBIs
• The Seminoles went 38-for-65 as a team (.585), with seven walks
• The Seminoles led 32-0 at one point in the fifth inning; FSU scored 11 runs in the fifth
• Ohio State’s starting pitcher Jared Strayer had a game ERA of ∞ after allowing seven earned runs before being pulled without recording a single out (oh, and he only faced seven batters)
• Weather was listed on the boxscore as: “Weather: More hotter, sunnier, nicer.”

Ohio State faced the Seminoles after being Georgia earlier in the day. Florida State was the Buckeyes’ fourth opponent in three days. And I think it was Ben Franklin that said Big Ten teams and prostitutes begin to stink after three days. Not that Franklin was an authority on those things; being from the Midwest and having syphilis really cancel each other out when you think about it.

Mike Edwards, a 38-year-old former pro rugby player in new Zealand, has been charged with "kidnapping, grievous bodily harm, arson, using a firearm, robbery and the theft" after allegedly attacking a convicted murderer named Michael Sneller.

Sneller, 63, has told police he went to meet someone in Stokes Valley, Lower Hutt, about 10pm on February 5 and was beaten with a shotgun before being dumped, unconscious and severely injured, in a stolen station wagon.  He was able to escape at daybreak and was admitted to hospital with severe facial fractures.

And don't forget that arson charge.  Edwards is also accused of setting the station wagon on fire before he left the scene. 

If you want to commit murder, one method is to beat your victim severely with a shotgun, lock him in the trunk of a station wagon, set the station wagon on fire, and then walk away assuming that everything will go according to plan.  Gosh, if only there were a more effective way to kill someone.  **scratches head with shotgun**

[Sports by Brooks]