The San Francisco Zoo Named A Baby Monkey After Sergio Romo

Written by Ashley Burns / 11.01.12

In recent years, lucky animals have played a huge part in Major League Baseball teams’ World Series runs, from the Anaheim Angels of Anaheim Los Angeles Angels’ Rally Monkey to the St. Louis Cardinals’ classier and more intelligent Rally Squirrel. This year, the World Champion San Francisco Giants had a much less heralded but equally important furry good luck charm in a rare orange langur monkey that was born at the San Francisco Zoo during the Giants’ playoff run.

Dubbed the “Lucky Langur” after its birth and the team’s subsequent wins, the zoo’s monkey people (you’d think they’d have an official title) decided that it was finally time to name this adorable little living pumpkin.

It’s official: That adorable newborn monkey whose birth coincided with the Giants World Series winning streak has been named, and we think you will be pleased.

San Francisco, meet Romo. (Via San Francisco Weekly)

I’m told that right after they chose Romo, the monkey threw its poop and it was intercepted and returned for a touchdown. OHHHHH, they meant Sergio Romo, the beloved Giants closer, whose strange beard and quirky behavior filled in perfectly for the injured Brian Wilson, whose strange beard and quirky behavior had its own strong presence in the Giants’ dugout.

Alas, there’s one little problem with this monkey’s new name – this Romo is a girl. Again, the Tony Romo jokes write themselves.

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Congratulations To Jerry Lin And The New York Giants For Their World Series Win

Written by Brandon Stroud / 10.29.12

Today’s headline brought to you by this lady. In all seriousness, congratulations to the San Francisco Giants and all the Giants fans I know. Let’s hope next year’s World Series contains at least one team with a racist name from a city where nothing ever happens.

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The Air Sex Championships Returned To Austin And Oh God, They Let Me Judge Again |With Leather|

Hold Me I’m Scared: The Best 80s Horror Movie VHS Covers |Gamma Squad|

…And Then They Asked Alicia Keys To Pick Jay-Z Or Nas. |Smoking Section|

THE BEN WEAR STRIPES. THE BEN THROW TO STRIPE MAN |Kissing Suzy Kolber|

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The Dugout: SFinal Destination 3

Written by Brandon Stroud / 08.23.11

Barry Zito San Francisco Giants Injury

This Ride Will Be The Death Of You.

That’s Final Destination 3‘s tagline, because it is about a roller coaster that kills you. The roller coaster crash in that movie takes about nine minutes, making it the longest f**king roller coaster of all time.

Anyway, so arrives the third and final (until the sequel) installment of guest writer Bill Hanstock’s SFinal Destination series. We’ve spent seven-plus years portraying Giants fans as the butt of a horse, so hopefully this will catch on with San Fran Fans and open up a world of new ideas, such as the Giants dying in an airplane and the Giants dying on a freeway. In case you missed our updates on Friday, our updates yesterday AND today’s Morning Links, please read Part 1 and Part 2 before clicking through.

Then, click through. Today’s HAUNTING Dugout THRILLRIDE~ is after the jump.

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