Seahawks fullback Owen Schmitt might be short on talent, but he’s even shorter on brains. And pain threshold. Here’s Schmitt, he of the reportedly steel forehead, after being introduced before his first career start yesterday against the Jaguars. And Schmitt marked the occasion by beating himself in the head, with his helmet. And this is the same dude that was praised for being a “workout freak” after bulking up 15 pounds during his tour as an upperclassman at West Virginia. I’m sure he just worked really hard in the weight room and paid strict attention to his diet, just like all those other hard-working fellows.
Oh, by the way, Schmitt did catch one pass for three yards yesterday. And then he probably tried to eat the ball. Still better than the ribs at TGI Fridays. Their ribs are terrible. That video’s after the jump. Read the rest of this entry »
New Seahawks wide receiver T.J. Houshmandzadeh was overshadowed in Cincinnati by the play, and later the antics, of Chad Ochocinco. Now that Housh has the stage to himself in Seattle, he’s putting on his own show, threatening to boycott playing the new Madden game because of his rating.
“I understand I averaged 10 yards a catch, but it’s the offense, not me,” Houshmandzadeh said, via Mike Sando of ESPN.com. “I’m not playing Madden no more until they get my rating right. . . . I used to be the best in the world at Madden. I’m going to miss not playing it, but until they do me right, I’m not playing it any more.” via.
The people at Electronic Arts, the wards of the great football franchise, had already announced earlier in the year that gamers would see less parity in their favorite players’ ratings for this year’s game. The logic was that the elite talents in the NFL should be the elite talents in its virtual counterpart.
But here’s the rub–Housh has an overall rating of 91 in this year’s game. Not bad for the leading receiver on a team that went 4-11-1 last season. Why do the wideouts always have to be so crabby? You’d think they were playing in the slot wearing high heels and a Valentino gown. Heh, slot.
NFL Commissioner and noted Stairmaster addict Roger Goodell is spending his Wednesday morning assaulting Washington State’s Mt. Rainer, the state’s highest peak at 14,411 feet. The Commish has been joined on the expedition by Seattle Seahawks head coach Jim Mora, Jr., who is no longer being referred to as “Junior” by the media for some reason. Surely a guy who said he would abandon the Falcons in a playoff run is entirely too mature to be referred to as “Junior.” From NFL.com:
Guide Peter Whittaker said the group spent about five hours Monday training in wind and fog. He and fellow climbing expert Ed Viesturs are leading the climb for charity that also includes Seahawks chief executive Tod Leiweke.
“Gotta say the commish performed,” Whittaker told The Associated Press in an e-mail. “He is a good listener and grasped mountaineering basics reasonably well. A lot of mountain to go though … we were at 6,000 feet.”
Goodell’s party had planned to start attempting the summit sometime early this morning. That crazy Goodell, he’s either a genuine man of the people or a five-star poseur. Somebody tell him that he can afford a parade of helicopters to just drop him onto the mountain if he wanted. In a 24-karat gold bobsled, no less. But I understand that Ranier is a pretty tricky climb. Most of it is up, until you reach the very, very top. And then it tends to slope away rather sharply.
RAWR! MORE SMELT!!!
Remember how former Seahawks head coach Mike Holmgren talked about being burnt out and needing to get away from the game? Maybe not retire-retire, but at least spend some time focused on his family? Yeah, well, not so much:
Former Seattle Seahawks coach Mike Holmgren said he has made the decision that he wants to work again and is open to the idea of coaching, but has not made a final decision on whether he will do that or work in a front office somewhere…
Holmgren laughed that on draft day he was supposed to be babysitting one of his grandchildren but kept sneaking peeks at the television. Soon he was talking to it, criticizing teams’ moves. Finally [wife] Kathy Holmgren came in and reminded him that he wasn’t working.
Oh, so that’s where Brett Favre learned it.
I suppose that, as a Seahawks fan, I’m supposed to feel some kind of outrage that Holmgren is itching to get back in the game. Eh, not really. Sure, he got Seattle to a Super Bowl, but his mastery of the West Coast offense hasn’t adapted to the way the game has changed over the last ten years, he’s terrible at making in-game decisions, the two-minute drill was always a disaster, and he more or less gave up on having a running game after Steve Hutchinson left. Don’t let the door hit you on the way back in.
Former Oklahoma linebacker and totally average NFL player Brian Bosworth got a DUI last night. On a motorcycle.
Cops pulled over The Boz on Hollywood Blvd. for not having a license plate on his bike, but detected alcohol on his breath. He failed the breathalyzer and was arrested and taken into custody at about 3:00 AM. We’re told he was very cooperative.
He is currently being held on $5,000 bail. [TMZ]
Brian Bosworth can’t come up with five grand? I was counting on his wisdom and insight to lead us out of these troubled economic times. Because he’s made so many good decisions in his life, see. But there is something badass about getting drunk and riding around on a motorcycle, even if you are a washed-up football player. I’m guessing he tried to keep drinking at the police station until he blew a .44 or better.
This concludes our broadcast day. We will have some Weekend Picks up tomorrow morning, but we’re ducking out for now. Thanks for reading and thanks to everyone that sent in tips this week. Less work for me! Have a great weekend.
After a season during which, at one point, their top six receivers were all sidelined with injuries, the Seattle Seahawks signed the premier wide receiver in free agency, luring T.J. Houshmandzadeh away from Cincinnati with a five-year deal worth $40 million ($15M guaranteed).
Houshmandzadeh, 32, is coming off three straight seasons with 90+ receptions as the #2 wideout behind Chad Johnson, and while the Hawks have no premier deep threat to get him free for that many looks, Housh — a bigger, better, younger version of Bobby Engram — will likely be a good fit in the West Coast offense if Matt Hasselbeck’s back doesn’t fall apart. In conclusion, I offer a tentative Wooooooo!!!!
Elsewhere in NFL news, Kurt Warner is in San Francisco to pass judgment on the godless Sodomites. And also to talk to the 49ers because the Cards got stingy. But mostly to pass judgment. And, because it happened over the weekend, we didn’t mention that the Chiefs got Matt Cassel and linebacker Mike Vrabel for a single second-round draft pick. Not reported: Bill Belichick also now has one of Scott Pioli’s kidneys.
