Arizona Cardinals defensive lineman Darnell Dockett is the reason why the @Storytime series exists. It began with him live-blogging a run-in with police and has featured his in-depth thoughts on the Casey Anthony murder trial with only enough time to buy an alligator between.

Lucky for us, Dockett continues to find himself in Tweetable situations — this time he accidentally brought a gun to a Cardinals practice facility in Arizona, realized his mistake, tweeted about it, and got upset when more than one person said “why are you carrying a gun everywhere”. He compares himself to Sean Taylor, explicitly explains which guns his has and where he keeps them, and the story ends with him vowing to protect his family by buying … well, I don’t want to ruin it for you.

Please enjoy our continuing journey through the mind of an extremely sane man with @Storytime, after the jump.

Read the rest of this entry »

I'm gonna finish today with this highlight reel of some of Sean Taylor's best plays.  To be fair, it's probably a little too kind about his playmaking skills early in his career — the ferocity with which he went after the ball made for a fair share of blown coverages — but by all accounts he was just blossoming into a fully realized safety with a well-rounded game this season. 

After the jump, the most memorable hit of Taylor's tragically short career.

This is, of course, Bills punter Brian Moorman eating a load of Taylor's shoulder on an attempted fake punt at the Pro Bowl.  As Big Daddy Drew noted, "I remember some people got mad about it.  'Hey, you can't try hard in the Pro Bowl!'"  I don't think Taylor understood not trying, and that's why NFL fans — not to mention the Taylor family — have lost something special.  Godspeed, Sean.

Sean Taylor succumbed to the gunshot wound he suffered late Sunday night.  He was 24.

It's hard to write something that sounds sincere on a website that is generally anything but that, but — as a fan — I was genuinely interested in what Taylor did on and off the field.  For better and worse, he played with the utmost passion — from his punishing hits in the secondary to the spitting incident that marked him as a "bad guy."  He was perhaps not the best safety in the game, but it's likely he was the most feared.

Of course, I can only distill from Taylor what I saw on the playing field.  His life extended beyond the sidelines, and my heartfelt wishes go out to his girlfriend, his one-year-old daughter, and the Washington Redskins community.

Redskins safety Sean Taylor was shot in the groin late last night in what appears to be a botched burglary.  From the Miami Herald:

According to police, Miami-Dade patrol officers received a call about 1:45 a.m. Monday that a homeowner had been shot in the leg. The homeowners told police they heard intruders at the rear door of the house, trying to pry it open.

The male homeowner went to investigate and a female in the house then heard a shot. Paramedics responded and found the victim, with a gunshot wound to the groin.

Other reports specify that Taylor's femoral artery has been severed, and for those of you who aren't doctors or trained in battlefield triage, that's pretty motherfucking serious.  It's basically the fastest way to bleed to death that isn't getting your head chopped off.  Perhaps down the line there will be ATV-related jokes to tell, but for now let's wait to see if Taylor survives.

DEPRESSING UPDATE: The Miami Herald has all kinds of un-cheerful details.

The Pro Bowl briefly refused to be about the sexiest cheerleaders in the AFC and NFC when Sean Taylor of the Washington Redskins treated Buffalo Bills' punter Brian Moorman like Ray Fosse. 

Because he declined to play at exhibition speed, Taylor was awarded the inaugural Pete Rose Asshole Award.  Bill Belichick, who called the fake punt that leveled Moorman, was heard to say that he had seen Ted Johnson take harder hits. -KD

(Thanks to Foul Balls for the better video.)