Back in June, we introduced you to Angelina Castro and Sara Jay, two adult film actresses who also happen to be the world’s biggest Miami Heat fans. Well, they made a promise to their several hundred thousand Twitter followers that if the Heat won the NBA Finals, they’d perform oral sex on all of their followers who showed up to a specific location on August 2. That day has since passed, and a few readers asked me, “Hey Burnsy, we know you only date Perfect 10 models, but did this event actually happen?”

You bet your Adult Friend Finder membership it did.

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We’re less than a month away from the most important basketball event of the summer, and it appears that the NBA is trying to ruin the fun for everyone. I’m not talking about the 2012 Summer Olympics, because I’m an American who lives with the foregone conclusion that Team USA will destroy every other basketball team, so the importance of such an event is lost on me.

No, I’m talking about two diehard Miami Heat fans who simply want to show the world how much they love their team by orally pleasing any man who wants to stand in a line and watch every guy in front of them get a beej. I believe that’s called the American dream. But the NBA doesn’t share that dream, because apparently the new league slogan is “Where hummers don’t happen”.

At least that’s what this statement from the league’s lawyers is telling Sara Jay and Angelina Castro.

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Before the NBA Finals began, there was some talk about two adult film actresses who had pledged to perform oral sex on all of their combined Twitter followers if the Miami Heat won the championship. I didn’t bother looking to see who the two starlets were, because I knew that they weren’t Kayden Kross or Andy San Dimas, so it didn’t matter to me. I mean, I was at church and I don’t know who those girls are or… whatever, it’s Friday.

The actual ladies in question are Angelina Castro and Sara Jay (semi-NSFW) – pictured above in their own crudely photoshopped tribute to the Heat – and according to their Tweets from last night, drop yo pants, fellas. And bring some Purell.

Ew. Everything about this. Just, ew.

I’d love to see the guys who show up to this, though. Real winners in that crowd, I’d expect. Probably wearing Mike Miller jerseys.

But I’m not one to crap on honest-to-goodness sports fans, so congrats, Sara Jay and Angelina Castro! Congrats, Miami Heat fans! Congrats, LeBron James and Chris Bosh! And congrats Centers for Disease Control!

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