This week on a very special edition of Raw, Camacho finds a bottle of speed pills in Rosa’s gym bag. Also …

Wait, I’m getting “actual Raw” and “Brandon’s Raw fan fiction” mixed up again. Here’s the actual preview:

Last week’s Raw SuperShow redefined the word “fallout” when AJ’s lip-lock with WWE Champion CM Punk ended with her putting both Punk and No. 1 contender Daniel Bryan through a table. Elsewhere, Alberto Del Rio responded to becoming No. 1 contender to the World Heavyweight Title with a veritable rampage through the roster. And one of the most exciting Money in the Bank Ladder Match participants picked up a surprise win last week that cost him dearly. How will things play out this Monday on Raw SuperShow?

In other WWE news, “person they should’ve signed three years ago” Sara Del Rey has reportedly been offered a developmental contract SO EXPECT HER TO DEBUT ON RAW TONIGHT (don’t, I’m kidding) and one of the top worldwide trends right now is “Bob Backlund”, so get ready for that.

As always, my 10 favorite comments from tonight’s open discussion will be featured in tomorrow’s Best And Worst Of WWE Raw 7/9/12 column. To nominate a comment for top 10 status, please reply to it with a +1. I urge you to vote for particularly funny, insightful or apropos comments and not just stuff you agree with. “I would have sex with AJ” is not a top comment of the week.

Pre-show discussion questions:

1. Is Kane’s ability to light a charcoal grill confirmation of his fire bending? If so, could Undertaker theoretically teach him to channel lightning through his chokeslam hand and redirect it at people? Bonus question: How many of you are dorky enough to discuss this with me at length?
2. What should our commenting badge be for the Money In The Bank open discussion thread this weekend?
3. If Bob Backlund doesn’t show up (because WWE knows too many people know he’ll show up), which WWE Legend should take his place? Don’t say X-Pac.
4. What’s your favorite GIF from our 20 Best Pro Wrestling GIFs Of June post?

One of the best part of our popular The Best And Worst Of WWE Raw column is the amazing collection of animated GIFs from Casey at Hammerlock Dialectic. They’re so good, in fact, that I’m sad when people who don’t read the column (or like pro wrestling) miss out on them. Trust me, there is some colossally ridiculous looking stuff happening in the world of pro wrestling and you don’t need the ability to pretend it’s real to appreciate it.

Combine that truth with what Jon Bois is doing to improve GIF art awareness at SB Nation and a “best wrestling gifs of the month” feature sounded like a no-brainer. So here are my 21 favorite animated GIFs from the world of pro wrestling for June, keeping in mind that:

1. The July 4 weekend messed up everybody’s schedule, so go along with me and pretend June just ended.
2. So far we only do a WWE column on the site, so June’s GIFs will be WWE heavy. With GIFs Of The Month becoming a regular feature, we’ll move forward with more of an emphasis on giffing everything that happens in the world of wrestling, and oh my god you are not ready for Japan.
3. A lot of GIFs appeared in the Raw column, but a lot of them are being seen for the first time.
4. We’ll try to get a more uniform GIF size in the future.

Anyway, enough qualifiers. Check out the 20 best pro wrestling GIFs for June, with little-to-no context provided.

Read the rest of this entry »

As the guy in charge of the Best And Worst Of WWE Raw column I’ve built up a little Internet street cred, all of which I’d like to use now; if you’ve ever trusted my opinions on the world of pro wrestling, order this Sunday’s CHIKARA pro wrestling’s “High Noon” Internet pay-per-view. I’m not posting this because I’ve been paid or asked to, I’m posting because I sincerely believe that this company of crazy little guys in masks is one of the best things we’ve got going on in the putrid, niche world we’ve decided to love and think you’d love it, and that they need to be supported.

Here’s the quick version: you watch it live as it happens on your computer and it only costs you $14.99 for (give or take) three hours and 45 minutes of wrestling. The upside is that every one of those 230ish minutes is better than what you might’ve paid 50 dollars to see one of three times from WWE this month. Remember, this is coming from a guy who finds something to like on even the worst episodes of Raw.

I didn’t like CHIKARA a few years ago. I thought it was stupid. People kept telling me, “watch CHIKARA, they blew a guy up with a fake grenade, watch CHIKARA, they’ve got a guy named Dragon Dragon who is literally a dragon, watch CHIKARA, you’ll love this match”. I resisted. A couple of years ago I found myself in Philadelphia and attended a show (Aniversario Yang, if you’re keeping score) and it hooked the sh*t out of me. Since then I’ve driven hours and bought plane tickets from Texas to see CHIKARA shows, shows that might be happening down the street from you, because of how I’ve come to understand it and how much they’ve given me back. They’ve given me a lot.

Don’t just think it’s funny stuff in masks. The wrestling has gotten better and better and has started feeling like that “great” you forget about watching TV. They’ve also got Eddie Kingston, and if you don’t know how Eddie Kingston is, let me share with you hands down the best pro wrestling promo of 2011.

Read the rest of this entry »

KANA, Sara Del Rey, and my heart somewhere in the middle.

Links

The Wrestling Podcast: Brandon Stroud II - In my second TWP appearance I talk WWE walkout stats, compare Anarchy Championship Wrestling’s ACH to Childish Gambino, discuss how and why we hate Brian Wilson and talk up the importance of fat guys in pro graps. Also, I love those women in the header, and you can sorta tell. [The Wrestling Blog]

Childish Gambino – “All The Shine” - Speaking of, I am excited for “Camp”, and you don’t have to explain the French cinema references. [The Smoking Section]

Remedial Chaos Theory - Speaking of speaking of, last night’s episode of ‘Community’ was incredible, so if you missed it, watch it here. Six times. [NBC]

Surprise, Guy Fieri Is A Total Dick - In the least shocking news of the year, America’s Worst Food Person is anti-Semitic and scared of gay people. I guess the spiked blonde hair and the sunglasses and the bowling shirts and the chain wallets and the throwing up of horns weren’t good enough indicators. [Warming Glow]

Who Voltron’d It Better? - Voltron is one of those things I always hoped would still be available when I became a hot shot movie director. That doesn’t seem to be working out for me, but … uh, anybody on the UPROXX network secretly VP at Sony or something? [Gamma Squad]

The New Muppets Trailer Makes Me Happy - …even if they’ve got to add a bunch of farts to get 2011′s kids to see it. Puppet Dracula from Forgetting Sarah Marshall had better make a cameo in this somewhere. [Filmdrunk]

The 10 Finest Pop Culture Charts From Dan Meth’s Pop Culture Charts Series - That “Trilogy Meter” is so wrong I can’t even begin to explain it. Jurassic Park is only about as good as the original X-Men? Are you on drugs? [UPROXX]

Hot Potato Gallery: Model/Grappler Monique Minton - When I grow up, I want to be a “model/grapper”. [Cage Potato]

Sports Cards For Insane People: Fleer Pro-Visions - Yeah, not going to pretend I have any f**king idea what the hell is going on on these cards. [SBN]

Sean Taylor Memorial Meast Of The Week/Jeff George Memorial least Of The Week: Week 5 - Easily the best photoshop ever added to the top of an UPROXX Network post. Everything that happens in the NFL should relate to Super Mario Kart in some way. [Kissing Suzy Kolber]