We don’t really ease back into our regular features scheduling until Monday, but Christmas is over, right? That’s it. When the 26th hits, it’s the end of the “everybody singing Jingle Bells” jazz and straight into non-stop year-end lists until January.
We didn’t get to write about EVERYTHING Christmas-related this season and a lot of stuff is just being shared around today, so I thought I’d perform a gesture of good will and put everything relevant to post-Christmas Wednesday in one handy spot for the enjoyment of all. Or the enjoyment of anybody still clinging to Christmas, I guess.
Up first: School children singing a Robert Griffin III Christmas carol.
I probably could’ve used a better image than that. Yeap.
Former UNC Asheville Goalkeeper and Finnish trick shot artist Lassi Hurskainen is back with more tricks from his native Finland!
Lassi tells us a little about the Finnish people, the culture, checks-in with Finland’s most famous resident (Santa Claus) and teaches one Finn an important lesson! (via YouTube)
We see a lot of trick shot videos at With Leather, but this one has everything you need: unnecessary cameos (Santa, The Blue Meanie I think), incredible displays of accuracy (those goal post shots) and even more incredible displays of ridiculously unnecessary accuracy. Seriously, who knows how to kick food into a grocery cart? More importantly, who LEARNS to do that? And what grocery store says, “sure, just kick our food until you get it right”?
Regardless, it’s a great video littered with adorable English and affirmations of Finnish politeness, so check it out.
That statement inspires one of two feelings inside you. The first is a swell of hope and a flood of memories from 65 years of America’s greatest team sport. The second, most succinctly summed up as “meh”, only allows you to enjoy basketball when jumping online to tell a bunch of strangers on the Internet how little of a sh*t you give about basketball being back. More than football, more than wonderful old boring baseball, pro basketball (especially now, especially after all that) divides us right down the middle, leaving us cheering with tears in our eyes or dismissing with a wanking motion.
To illustrate this point, see Exhibit A: TNT’s NBA Opening Day montage. Michael Jordan is giving respeck knuckles to Derrick Rose. Wilt Chamberlain is slapping Dwight Howard on the ass. Magic is no-look f**king passing to Kobe Bryant. It should give you goosebumps. If it doesn’t, please consult the second video, wherein a drunk guy in a Santa suit gets great tickets to an opening day game and uses his time to yell WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM SANTA, A RING to LeBron James while he shoots free throws.
As a kid who grew up fearing the pink aisle because of what it said about me, I’m happy kids like this are starting to exist.
I hope everyone had a great Christmas. I spent Christmas Eve facepalming in Cowboys Stadium and I don’t even like the Cowboys. If you got gifts and want to let strangers know about them, tell us what you got in the comments section below. We’ve got staggered, “thread” style commenting enabled now, so people can troll you directly.
On A Christmas Story, Its Lessons For Hip-Hop & Biggie Smalls - “Rich and chocolate like Ovaltine!” – Ludacris, probably [Smoking Section]
New And Improved And Watchable Jingle All The Way - This makes me want to spend all day watching Commando. [UPROXX]
The 100 Greatest Christmas Shows - My pal Mike Westfall’s list from 2004, which sadly cannot include Annie Edison putting baby Jesus in the tree. Still a pretty definitive list. [Progressive Boink]
All I Want For Christmas Is A ‘Game Of Thrones’ Teaser And A Fresh Prince Reunion - My weirdest and most Abed-like career goal is to buy (or recreate) the set from The Fresh Prince, live there, and occasionally have James Avery stop by and hang out with me. Getting him to say WHAT THE BLAZES would be a bonus. [Warming Glow]
20 Screaming Santa Visits - I feel like kids who cry on Santa’s lap are fundamentally wrong, and this should be an indicator that what you’re doing isn’t working. A child should not be terrified of someone who wants to give them tons of gifts and already has their parents’ permission. They’re going to suck when they get older. [Buzzfeed]
The Colts Choked When They Tried To Suck - That gif is just the greatest thing in the world. And yes, the Texans blowing that game was a Christmas present to Indianapolis and/or St. Louis, you can’t convince me otherwise. [Kissing Suzy Kolber]
Hey Zelda Fans – The Timeline Exists, And Here It Is - I can’t believe I’m actually looking at this thing. It’s like I’ve found my way to El Dorado. [Gamma Squad]
Every Batman Suit Ever - Also, a great reminder that everything ever said by Batman not written for The Animated Series or the Justice League cartoon is f**king stupid sounding. [Film Drunk]
The 25 Greatest MMA Photos Of 2011 - MMA would be 100% better if they didn’t do that forced staredown thing every single time. Also, pro wrestling would be better if they didn’t try to do the MMA staredown for their video packages every week. [Cage Potato]
Lindsey Vonn Says She Isn’t Dating Tim Tebow - … but isn’t “opposed” to dating him. Well, hopefully that changed after this weekend. [Sportress Of Blogitude]
ACW: Delusions Of Our Childish Days 2011 - The Dirty Dirty Sheets review of the latest Anarchy show in Austin. Still not 100% on why I’m not their correspondent for these things, but hey. Rachel Summerlyn in a Santa suit. [DirtyDirtySheets]
Welcome to our weekly installment of Friday Face-Off, in which we pit two random videos against each other in the ultimate battle of “Awwww” and “Oh snap!” as you, our glorious With Leatherites, determine which video shall forever live in infamy as a champion. As always, feel free to submit videos to BurnsyWL@gmail.com and winning videos will receive our super cool, not-for-sale-anywhere With Leather t-shirts.
As we tip-toe toward Christmas, I thought we’d try a little experiment to see if it’s possible for anything to be better than Santa Claus, who is totally real despite what my brother has been telling me for 27 years. Obviously I have a great deal of respect for the other many wonderful holidays that take place at this time of year, but they don’t have any mascots with immense commercial appeal, so maybe they should try a little harder.
That said, our first video this week is a super heavyweight contender, as it features the world’s most popular animal of the week, Siku the polar bear cub, who was abandoned by his mom because she couldn’t produce milk. Abandoned. On Christmas. Is it cold in here? Then it’s time to turn up the cute.
It’s no secret that women love baseball players, and they’re also pretty big suckers for Santa. So when you combine the two of them into one man with an engagement ring in tow, well it just flat out sucks for the rest of us. In a game that was highlighted by the year’s biggest phantom whistle controversy, the New Orleans Saints barely eeked out a 22-17 win over the Tennessee Titans. But one of the Titans cheerleaders made the only worthwhile headline when she agreed to marry Santa.
During their halftime routine of gyrating hips, Janae Kram was a little creeped out by the pervy St. Nick approaching her, until he revealed to her that he was her boyfriend and Washington Nationals minor league pitcher Ben Graham. Meanwhile, every kid at that game is still crying.
“I was trying to keep my cool and do the performance,” she said, “They were telling me [before the performance] that Santa was going to do something and it could be a little embarrassing, so I was thinking the old man is going to dance with me. When I looked over and saw Ben it was really exciting.”
(Via WKRN News with video of the proposal and their reactions.)
Kram is also an aspiring actress and we certainly wish her luck in her entertainment career, as she is marrying a Single A pitcher with a 4-4 record this year. Start saving, kids!