A heads-up play by Sacramento Kings head coach Keith Smart saved the life of baby Newt Gengrich yesterday. Baby Dauber from ‘Coach?’ This is cute, but my favorite part is the kid next to him. Watch him … he cowers from a bouncing basketball even though it’s WAY too far to his left to ever hit him, and when Smart offers a low-five to the kid he actually saved, THIS kid starts chuckling and tries to get in on it. I’m onto you, other kid.

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Links

In The ‘Hunger Game Of Thrones,’ Which Character Would Reign Supreme? |Warming Glow|

Actresses Without Teeth Is Here To Meet Your Weekly Nightmare Fuel Quota |UPROXX|

Phil Spector’s wife sounds super stable |Film Drunk|

Blindfold Soccer Is The Best Soccer |With Leather|

Let’s Go Exploring Our Favorite Calvin And Hobbes GIFs |Gamma Squad|

WZUP II: 5 Legendary ‘Martin’ Characters |Smoking Section|

We Did It, Guys: Bacon Condoms |Kissing Suzy Kolber|

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Worried about the Sacramento Kings and their impending move to Seattle? Enjoy this fan anthem, entitled ‘Hey Kings, Stay Kings! (My Balls).’ I’ve listened to it twice now, and as far as I can tell, it’s less a “please stay in our town” anthem and more of a “give us your phone numbers so we can f**k you before you leave” type thing. (via That NBA Lottery Pick

- Follow us on Twitter @withleather
- Follow me personally @MrBrandonStroud and Burnsy @MayorBurnsy
- Like us on Facebook.

Links

Reader Appreciation: Five Awesome Internet Finds From UPROXX Readers |Warming Glow|

‘Kanye West Wing’ Is A Match Made In Ego Heaven |UPROXX|

I wrote some haikus about the poem James Franco wrote for Obama |Film Drunk|

LeBron James and Dwyane Wade Seductively Rocked South Beach Battioke |With Leather|

Guy Builds A Functional Iron Man Gauntlet With Lasers. Take That, Back Of The Hand. |Gamma Squad|

Take A Peek Into Beyonce’s World Courtesy Of GQ |Smoking Section|

Tim Tebow’s New Endorsement Deal Sets Us Up For The Easiest Joke Of The Day |Kissing Suzy Kolber|

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I’m still planning to wait until tomorrow to unleash my incredible, unparalleled NBA Draft Preview on your asses, but I’m pretty happy that the Houston Rockets have finally stirred the pot and created some excitement for us fans of franchises that blow. Apparently the Rockets are hellbent on wrangling as many first round draft picks as they can, and they took one step closer to fruition of their diabolical plan today when they shipped Chase Budinger to the Minnesota Timberwolves for the No. 18 pick.

This was perhaps the best response I saw regarding that trade.

Now the Rockets have the 14th, 16th, and 18th picks in Thursday night’s draft, and it’s no secret at all that they covet disgruntled drama queen Dwight Howard, who may or may not have once again told the Orlando Magic that he wants to be traded to the Brooklyn Nets. So are those three picks enough to get Howard?

Houston’s first-round assets will create an intriguing proposition for the Magic and their new general manager, Rob Hennigan. Just a week into his job, Hennigan will be faced with his first major player-personnel decision.

The Magic have maintained they don’t want to go through another season like they just did, when the drama surrounding Howard and his future dominated Orlando’s every move. Multiple first-round picks might be the enticing offer Orlando needs to break free from Howard. (Via USA Today)

It should be noted that aside from a few rumblings about “sources close to Howard”, Howard is still recovering from back surgery and hasn’t talked to anybody about his future since the Stan Van Gundy mess, when he had TMZ on speed dial. In fact, as far as anyone knows, Howard hasn’t even had contact with new Magic GM Rob Hennigan yet.

But while the Miami Heat celebrate and Anthony Davis trademarks his eyebrows in time to be called by the New Orleans Hornets, all we’ve got are rumors. So let’s entertain this one a little further…

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The two Vince Carter videos you’re about to watch, when viewed in succession, can illustrate one of two themes:

1. It is life in a nutshell. Even if you’re the guy who cleared a seven-footer in the Olympics, you’re capable of taking one of the worst shots in basketball history. And if you take one of the worst shots in basketball history, you’re still capable of throwing it down on the tallest guy on the court.

2. Blake Griffin’s playbook: you are terrible at basketball so just dunk, because you are so good at dunking.

Video number one features Carter pulling out a great ball fake, tries to softly finger-roll it in like so much George Gervin and airballing it like he’s me trying to pull that shot off in HORSE. Video number two, about three minutes of game clock later, features Carter dunking on 7-foot Kings center Hassan Whiteside like it was nothing.

A brief miscalculation, or Father Time chipping away at his legs? You make the call.

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I went to my local watering hole yesterday after work to enjoy a few sophisticated beverages before I attended the Orlando Magic game, and the barkeep tuned the image box to SportsCenter, which devoted about 70% of the show to New York Knicks guard Jeremy Lin. A few dozen Linsanity puns later and my enjoyment of the rise of this unexpected Knicks star was pretty much over. But the Knicks, Buddha bless them, are rightfully milking this thing for all it’s worth, as they’ve radically raised ticket prices and are pumping out merchandise faster than a sweatsh… irt company. A sweatshirt company is totally what I meant to write.

Of course it was inevitable that this love for a guy, who is Chinese but was born and raised in California before attending Harvard, would hit some awkward racial moments. However, what happened last night on the MSG Network during the Knicks 100-85 victory over the Sacramento Kings, in which Lin set a career high with 13 assists, was just downright stupid. During the broadcast, the network aired this picture…

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In Kenneth Faried’s first game, he had four rebounds and zero points. In his second, he takes an incredible no-look alley-oop from reserve guard Rudy Fernandez and skies above a defeated Jimmer Fredette to put a f**king exclamation point on the Nuggets 110-83 rout of the Sacramento Kings.

It ranks somewhere between “the first sip of oasis water when you’ve been crawling through the desert” and “losing your virginity to Kate Upton” on the scale of how great the first of something can be. This is the kind of stuff I pretended to be doing when I was 13 and dunking on a seven-foot rim.

Tom Ziller of SB Nation offers further analysis:

I can’t wait until Faried and Nene start appearing together. We won’t know which braided superathlete it is flying through the air!