I have a running list of types of injuries that just sound horrible to me, and right at the top is a ruptured testicle. I’ve been kicked in the nuts before by some less-than-pleasant ladies, and on various occasions I have also experienced the unimaginable pain of sitting on the ol’ nads. (Ladies, I will never know what giving birth feels like, but you’ll also never know the pain of sitting on your marbles, so let’s call it even.) But I am fairly certain that if I ever ruptured one of my boys, I would not have much of a sense of humor about it.

However, that’s not the case with Warrington Wolves prop Paul Wood, whom I had never heard of before today because I am an ignorant American when it comes to rugby, but now consider a much, much braver and more grizzled man than I. During his team’s 26-18 loss to Leeds on Saturday, Wood not only experienced a ruptured testicle, but he played the entire game with the injury. And even after he went to the hospital and had the testicle removed, he joked with his fans on Twitter about it.

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You all might know about the New Zealand national rugby team that goes by the ‘All-Blacks’, who are mostly famous because of their famous Haka dance where they all get in position at pre-game and perform a feral version of those dances Danzel Washington made his team do in Remember the Titans that are meant to intimidate opponents and receive lots of hits on the internet. It kind of looks like a combination of a human sacrifice ceremony and a turkey mating dance.

Anyway, a new BBC documentary has discovered the story of All-Black superstar Buck Shelford, whose insatiable zest for winning trumped all, including his own testicular health.

If ever there was one moment when Wayne “Buck” Shelford embedded his name forever into rugby’s rich history, it was during the infamous “Battle of Nantes” in 1986. Playing only his second Test for the All Blacks against a physically intimidating French side, Shelford found himself at the bottom of a rather aggressive ruck on 20 minutes.

An errant Les Bleus stud found its way to his groin, where it somehow managed to tear his scrotum, leaving one testicle hanging out. This alone would leave most men screaming in agony and heading for the nearest hospital. But not Shelford. He calmly instructed the physio to stitch him up.

The French public were gobsmacked as an over-eager pitchside cameraman filmed the stomach-turning surgery, and even more so when Shelford returned to the field and carried on playing.

“I was knocked out cold, lost a few teeth and had a few stitches down below,” recalls the Saracens coach. -BBC

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