It's Bears vs. Packers week, which means even though the Monsters of the Midway suck this season, I'm watching the game because ancient hatreds must be cultivated or else they'll die. As I listened to the FOX Network's NFL Sunday and contemplated suicide, I was intrigued to learn that the name of FOX's football robot is Cleatus. The robot was named in write-in contest by a viewer from (surprise, surprise) Cheyenne, Wyoming. This is pretty much the worst name for a robot ever, and I'd like to see some better suggestions in the comments.  Plus, FOX already has a Cletus.

Anyway, typing 'robot' and 'fox' into a Google image search will get you many pics of the lovely Megan Fox, so enjoy. But remember, robots are dangerous. -KD

Oh sure, it starts out all fun and games. The robots play a little baseball, a little soccer, a little air hockey. Then you wake up one day and the human race is enslaved. Don't say I didn't warn you.

I've watched this video twice and it still gives me the chills. Did we really need the Terminator-like point-of-view in the second half of the video?

On the other hand, the guy playing the robot needs to stop being such a bitch and score on that asshole piece of junk. Show those fuckers who's boss. 

Source = We Are The Postmen 

Hey everybody, sorry the posts have come so slowly today. I've been doing more detective work on slutty cheerleaders (and by detective work I actually mean "detective work" — for real), and tomorrow morning I hope to have an update on more sexy scandal.

Until then, here's a video of robots playing soccer I found thanks to a tip from Garth at Soccernista. They're not even sexy robots. Sorry about that.

Good Lord that's a high-scoring affair. Final score: a brazillion to eleventy-two. I have a hard time believing that the crowd was still going apeshit after the thirtieth consecutive goal, but on the other hand, this "RoboCup" went down in Germany, and those people love anything. They think Hasselhoff is a quality entertainer. Even the French have better standards of quality. And they like Jerry Lewis. And maligning Muslim immigrants.

This was on Deadspin yesterday. It's a robot that plays baseball. And by "plays baseball" I mean "has a gigantic hole in its swing."

Well, I guess we can push back the robotic revolution and the end of humanity another decade or so. What a shitty robot. Oooh, look at the way it crushed foul balls halfway down the first base line!

Although I guess it could play single-A ball in the Royals organization. 

Peter Gammons is back, and I say it's about time. This guy is like 800 years old. It should be pretty clear by now that he's immortal, or some kind of bionic sentient being. Like Robin Williams in Bicentennial Man. Um, not that I saw it, of course.

And just why did Gammons need such a long vacation anyway? I don't even know what a brain aneurysm is. A stroke I know is a blood clot in the brain, but an aneurysm? Is that like a… like a what? An explosion of some sort? A spasm? If it's a brain spasm they should just call it a brain spasm. Man, I hate doctors. "Stop smoking." "Stop drinking." "We need to operate if you want to live." They think they know everything.