I'm finishing the day with thousands of British fans singing the annoyingly catchy "Hatton Wonderland," just because it's going to be a while before we hear anything about Ricky Hatton again.  And also because I like to do mean things to my readers.

At least it's not his entrance music, though.  "Blue Moon"?  Seriously?  He may as well enter the ring lip-syncing "Summer Nights" from Grease.  And not Travolta's part, either.  The chicks' part.  The back-up chicks.  Tell me more, tell me more!  Like does he have a car? 

Ummm… not that I know that song or anything.  GRRR BOXING!!!

The Daily Mail has fun shots of Ricky Hatton's girlfriend as she gags in reaction to his 10th-round KO to Floyd Mayweather on Saturday night. 

Jennifer Dooley, who gave up her teaching job in Britain to see her boyfriend fight Floyd Mayweather, looked like she was being physically sick as Hatton fell to the floor for the final time in the early hours of Sunday morning.

Oh man, if she gets ill at the sight of her boyfriend getting punched out, she would really hate my "trophy room."  I'm sorry, but I love taxidermy and hookers too much to give either one up. 

But a defiant Hatton, 29, insisted he is not ready to throw in the towel on his career… recovering after his loss, the welterweight vowed: "I'm not finished".

The guy just lost for the first time in 44 fights, and he's only 29.  I don't think "I'm not finished" is exactly the most surprising quote.  Unless they got it from him at a restaurant.  Because the only thing left on his plate was a couple French fries, and he hadn't touched his food in like ten minutes.

Floyd Mayweather Jr. remained undefeated by knocking out Ricky Hatton in the 10th round last night at the MGM Grand in Las Vegas: 

The sound seems to be lagging a bit behind the pictures in this video, but that's to be expected since the color commentator is Robert Burns, and he's been dead for 223 years. -KD 

English boxer Ricky Hatton has a unique strategy for an upcoming fight with Floyd Mayweather Jr.:

Hatton will evoke the spirit of Roberto Duran in his quest to become the first man to defeat Floyd Mayweather Jr. and establish himself as the No. 1 pound-for-pound boxer in the world.  That is the view of Hatton's trainer, Billy Graham, who said . . . "This is Ricky's Sugar Ray Leonard fight. It's the first Duran-Leonard fight all over again. Look at how Duran won that fight and you will see how Ricky will beat Floyd."

If anybody can conjure the spirit of Roberto Duran (pictured here filming Heaven's favorite reality show, Hands of Stone, Abs of Jell-O), it's surely Billy Graham.  I can't imagine the old Christian Crusader will summon the fighting Panamanian's ghost with the aid of a séance or the dark arts, so it will be interesting to see how Duran comes to haunt the world of the living.  Though, wouldn't an English boxer be better served harnessing the power of Duran Duran?  Union of the Snake or Hungry Like the Wolf must be as motivational for the Brits as The Eye of the Tiger is for us.  Remember when you collected all those Dynamite magazines with Simon LeBon on the cover?  And do you also remember how everyone was shocked when you came out?  I wasn't. -KD

Asst. Editor note: Roberto Duran is not actually dead yet, but he may soon be if he can't say "no mas" to extra desserts.