If you don’t watch terrible television, you might not know that professional wrestling is obsessed with MTV’s ‘Jersey Shore’. Is it because of the outlandish, over-the-top personalities? Is it because of the ethnic stereotyping and hand gestures? Are they just the only two shows low enough to share a denominator*?

Whatever the reason, the multi-verse Age Of Apocalypse crossover continues as TNA wrestling (the luminaries who brought you Pac-Man Jones as a tag team champion not legally cleared to wrestle) will bring on its third Jersey Shore castmate, Ronnie.

Ronnie Ortiz-Magro gets in the ring with TNA’s IMPACT WRESTLING on SpikeTV! Star of MTV’s “Jersey Shore” makes his wrestling debut on Thursday, November 3. Ronnie Ortiz-Magro, star of MTV’s megahit series, “Jersey Shore,” will bring his pumping fists and bravado into the wrestling ring on TNA’s “Impact Wrestling” airing exclusively on Spike TV Thursday, November 3 at 9:00pm ET/PT.

Crossing over with mainstream audiences is a major goal for pro wrestling, with Cyndi Lauper’s participation in WWF’s Rock N’ Wrestling 1980s and Mike Tyson’s interaction with D-Generation X and Stone Cold Steve Austin in the 90s being important turning points in the medium’s popularity.

Impact Wrestling’s first attempt to bring over the Shore audience was cast member J-WOWW, who called somebody a bitch and got into a catfight. They followed that up with an appearance from former housemate Angelina, who called somebody a bitch and got into a catfight. WWE upped the Shore game by bringing in Snooki for Wrestlemania, which she built to by calling somebody a bitch and getting into a catfight. I wonder what Ronnie will end up doing?

You can check out videos of those appearances below. You know, if you hate yourself.
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In a blog post that would’ve gotten tons of traffic maybe six years ago, Manny Pacquiao celebrated his decision-by-way-of-inevitability victory over Sugar Shane Mosley by hanging out with socialite turned porn star turned pop culture icon turned something turned nobody Paris Hilton. I’m guessing he punched her in the face, which is why her eyeball is doing that thing.

Paris tweeted: “Hanging out with @MannyPacquiao and his beautiful wife Jinkee. They are such a sweet & down to earth couple! Love them! :)”

Jinkee also had her picture taken with the American celebrity. Paris reportedly had a hard time leaving the media room as Filipino fans mobbed her.

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Hank Baskett, to many of us, is rightfully known as “That guy that fumbled that onside kick in the Super Bowl last year,” also goes by the name of “That guy that married Kendra Wilkinson.” Kendra, of course, has graduated from the seedy world of posing nude to the esteemed medium of reality television. “Kendra” just aired its season premiere, and while we usually leave the TV thing to the experts, a couple moments from the show warranted mentioning:

Kendra dry humps Hank in the elevator.

Kendra simulates masturbation with a champagne bottle.

Not one to leave “well enough” alone, Kendra also simulates oral sex with said champagne bottle
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Kendra decides that if she doesn’t pose for Playboy, it’ll be her biggest regret in life. (She’s one of the few women I know of who would actually regret NOT getting naked.)

Kendra over-shares about Hank’s “hairy ass.” (Thanks for the image, Kendra.)

Kendra reveals her C-section scar in a sexy photo shoot for Things I Never EVER Want To See Again magazine. –via Hollywood Life.

Wow, that scar just puts a bunch of unpleasant images in my head. I wonder if she uses that as a backup vajayjay. Baskett, meanwhile, is on his fourth NFL team in two years. It almost makes you wonder which one in that relationship was passed around more…

The other day we discussed the wonder of marriage and how Los Angeles Lakers forward and Twizzlers fanatic Lamar Odom and his famous-because-her-sister-made-an-amateur-porn-with-Brandy’s-talentless-brother wife Khloe Kardashian were still crazier than ever for each other as they celebrated their first anniversary. Well get ready to feel your heart burst, because the truly sincere husband and wife have renewed their vows. I know, I think I felt some joy pee squirt out, too.

The whole ceremony was part of an elaborate and cunning ruse by Odom, who had Khloe’s friends pick her up – not literally, LOL – and blindfold her, not telling her where they were taking her and what for on her anniversary. Even the camera man from her scripted reality TV show kept the secret, I’m sure. And if all of that doesn’t scream romance enough, Khloe’s sisters, Kim and Khlewbacca, were in attendance, as was close friend of the family… Snooki. It really was like heaven on Earth.

Tell us that it was beautiful and magical so we can pretend like anyone but lonely women give a bean burrito fart about this stuff, USA Today:

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Jay Cutler, that lovable turnover machine, has found his way to the tabloids with news that he set himself up on a date with reality television star celebrity female Kristin Cavallari. According to various reports, the dashing darling of defensive backs has had a crush on Cavallari for a while, so he reached out to her to see if she had time in her busy schedule of doing absolutely nothing to meet up after the Chicago Bears recent preseason game against the Arizona Cardinals. And Cutler must have thrown down the smoothest of moves, because a girl like Cavallari doesn’t just fall for any random person with remote fame that pops into her life. She’s bona fide H-list status, friends.

And it gets even better, he’s already met her mom! Oh I know, I can hear the wedding bells ringing at St. James Cathedral already. Tell us, Zimbio, were they getting their freak on in public?

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