I thought we all had a pretty great conversation about the Manti Te’o story yesterday – except the one or two commenters who sassed me – so I wanted to bring up two fun little updates to the story because they jumped out of my monitors this morning and smacked me in the balls.

For starters, one of the first points I made in my rambling mess of thoughts yesterday was that this is Deadspin’s baby from start to finish, because Jack Dickey (or Tom Scocca, according to Donald Trump) and Timothy Burke did a great job putting together a puzzle that neither Notre Dame nor ESPN wanted to even take out of the box, because (if they’re to be believed) both parties knew about this hoax for weeks.

However, there are other people out there trying to steal the Te’o show now, like the New York Post, which decided to do what Deadspin was too nice to do and expose the poor girl whose photos had been taken and used as the fake face of Lennay Kekua. So now this girl who had nothing to do with any of this nonsense, other than giving an old friend a picture because she thought it might make a cancer patient happy, is being harassed by reporters. For what? So they can have someone crying on camera as she shouts, “I don’t f*cking know anything”? Classy.

But now my favorite part. The part where I’m right.

Read the rest of this entry »

It was funny because his wife was about to give birth while he was proposing to Kate Upton.

As has become the standard, news leaked on the Twitters yesterday that CNBC sports business reporter and host of Sports Biz: Game On, Darren Rovell, is heading back to the place where the smugness began, ESPN. The rumor made sense – Rovell’s sports celebrity stock is rapidly rising and plenty of people think that he’s a huge dick. Really, it’s a match made in heaven.

Once the rumor spread, Rovell eventually acknowledged on his Twitter account – the only Twitter account that matters, he’d have you believe – that he is indeed going back to the place where it all started for him,  in Bristol, CT.

Rovell’s a fun guy to talk about, because a lot of people really like him and a lot of people really, really loathe him. It’s easy to understand why he’s so popular, because he’s great at his job. Seriously, he offers up some really interesting information and statistics about the business side of sports. I can’t name anyone else that does what he does, or at least as well as he does.

That’s why it’s funny to watch his fans get pissy when people rip him – “He’s awesome at his job, he’s a cool guy, I’ve met him, he’s smart… I don’t get why people hate him so much.” It’s also actually quite easy to understand.

Read the rest of this entry »

Look at this jerk, he even blocks New Orleans on the map.

As he embraces life without the wonderful Michelle Beadle, Colin Cowherd reminded us yet again that when it comes to spewing opinions about sports, he’s a guy that does that. Cowherd didn’t make any friends in New Orleans earlier this week, after he complained about the prospect of the 2013 NFL Pro Bowl being held in the Big Easy.

Herped and derped ESPN’s popular radio and TV host:

“They have become the default place for everything, and the Pro Bowl is a family event. Players take their families,” Cowherd said. “Players aren’t going to go to New Orleans. New Orleans is not a family destination, it’s a party destination.”

Players aren’t going to go to New Orleans because it’s a party destination. Let that sink in for a minute. But Hawaii and its 12 hookers per square foot is practically a giant Chuck-E-Cheese.

Let’s just get to the meat of Cowherd’s beef:

“It is the least safe major city in the country… not my opinion, statistically the least safe,” he said. “There are only two where locals will tell you, turn around, don’t go that way…Detroit and New Orleans.”

Let’s forget for a second the fact that you can’t invoke statistics and then not offer any statistics, instead saying something as ridiculous as the locals will tell you to f*ck off like, fittingly, in Interview with a Vampire as they’re burning the city to the ground because of the plague. Cowherd’s entire argument boiled down to ignorance, as he eventually added:

“I want a lot of hotel rooms, a great airport, good weather, safety,” Cowherd said. “New Orleans is not top-15 in any of those.”

Naturally, New Orleans officials disagree.

Read the rest of this entry »

Earlier this month, Orlando’s Local 6 Sports Director David “Ping” Pingalore reported that Dwight Howard told Orlando Magic management that he wanted coach Stan Van Gundy fired. This story “broke” on April 4, and it led to one of the most amazingly awkward interviews in NBA history, when Van Gundy told reporters point blank that he knew Howard tried to have him fired, and then Howard interrupted the interview and put his arm around Van Gundy, completely oblivious to what just happened. Howard’s reaction when the reporters filled him looked a little like this:

The problem with Ping’s report was that it wasn’t anything new. Magic writers like Jarrod Rudolph had reported months ago that Howard wanted Van Gundy out, but it went unnoticed because it hadn’t been preceded by two months of trade deadline drama. Ping’s “sources” – which we’ll discuss in a moment – and their #HOTTGOSS were more timely and convenient for the NBA media that needed something to fill the downtime between the trade deadline and the playoffs. So Ping was heralded for this so-called scoop, and he was given a free pass for his next aimless, unsubstantiated breaking story.

That story, of course, was this week’s report that Howard refused to play for Van Gundy and was faking his herniated disc injury as a protest. Well if that’s true, Howard is the most committed liar since George Costanza, because he is having season-ending surgery that will require four months of recovery.

Read the rest of this entry »

I’m not a fan of Jeff Van Gundy — the only time he comes up in conversation is when I need someone to compare to Stevie from ‘Eastbound & Down’ — but I appreciate the thorough, somewhat obnoxious lengths he goes to to condemn flopping during Sunday’s game between the Miami Heat and New York Knicks. He’s right (he’s completely, 100% right), but at some point when he’s shouting over the upcoming games graphics you expect him to turn into Mike Gundy and scream about how old he is.

And no matter how right he is (he is totally right), the NBA isn’t going to punish flopping because you can’t punish flopping. Not only because of that terrible argument soccer fans use about it being “how the game is played”, but because if you start calling a technical on every guy on the court who doesn’t fall straight back when he’s touched you are swiftly and permanently neutering an honest man’s ability to play defense. Fines won’t work either, because LeBron James isn’t going to miss that 10-grand he’ll consciously decide to pay when he goes down like a fainting French lass at a f**king cotillion to regain possession in the playoffs.

It also won’t work because Jeff Van Gundy said it.

I guess the only way to fix it is a fundamental restructuring of sports and parenting, where we can organize teams in a world where people were raised with the idea that they should always try to do the right thing, and in a world where Winning At Sports isn’t a higher priority than decency. Also in this world, the Miami Heat have been put into a space shuttle and piloted into the sun.

[h/t to Ball Don't Lie]

Thou shalt not steal. As Tim Tebow would tell us all, that’s one of the first laws written by man. As an Internet writer and avid Tweeter, I’m one of the first people you’ll hear pissing and moaning about thievery because I’ve had jokes, terrible photoshops and even With Leather posts stolen many times. But I’ve always chalked it up to the nature of the game because we’re all hustlers out here trying to make that cheddar, or something like that. My point is that I always credit my sources because I respect creative property and integrity. I just wish others shared that belief.

That’s how we’ve come to this whole SOPA mess. Despite what people are erroneously Tweeting as fast as they can type, it’s not about people who post sh*t on their Facebook, Twitter or Tumblr pages. Well, not entirely. It’s about the sites like the defunct ChannelSurfing.net and others that illegally stream sports games, TV shows and movies. It’s about the torrent sites that allow people to steal music and movies. It’s about sh*t that’s illegal and wrong. The Internet certainly needs laws and crap most certainly needs to be flushed.

But that doesn’t mean that us innocent folk aren’t going to get caught in the wake. I’m against SOPA because I don’t like the idea of giving networks and corporations the power to crush us just because they feel like it. All power needs limitations and I need to know there’s a difference between some dick in Europe giving away free movies and me posting a clip of Blake Griffin dunking. I also don’t like ignorant politicians who are blatantly lining their pockets trying to cram a bill down our throats because they doesn’t understand this wild, crazy Internet and they believe that we’re all young punk thieves, when we’re actually the last frontier of creativity.

SOPA and PIPA were created by wealthy people with hair trigger mentalities. Both bills have foundations that are understandable, but they are still allowing people with money to have control over the voices of us that have little to no means of defending ourselves. Basically, they could take away my right to criticize people. It’s not a certainty, but I’ll be damned if I’ll even allow someone to open the door to the idea of taking away my God-given right of calling someone a douchebag because that douchebag doesn’t like it.

That said, here are some pictures of Kelly Brook supporting New Look lingerie, because that’s what my Internet was meant to give us. I assume she did this both in opposition to SOPA and clothing.

Read the rest of this entry »