… and that’s it. He “dose” it. Here we are, left with a video of a monkey cranking out a set of push-ups, then flipping over to do sit-ups while his trainer holds his ankles. It’s the kind of thing the Internet was made for, and I guess we’re just fulfilling that Planet Of The Apes prophecy where we teach apes how to be better than us en route to being ruled by them.
I’m not sure whether I’m supposed to be happy or sad for the fitness monkey, but here he is. Video is after the jump.
As someone who is naturally sculpted and forged from flesh and iron, when my buddy Chris at Dog and Pony Show Tweeted a video of a guy doing no-armed push-ups, I thought for sure it was about me, but it turns out that someone else on this planet is capable of such a feat with his feet. Too bad the video above is a fake. It has to be. No one on this planet is as powerful as me, but if the Russians are trying to clone me, then Barack Obama and the boys better send some other clones of me to Moscow on the fly or we’re gonna have some real life A Good Day to Die Hard going down.
Also, that movie was awesome. So go see that tonight if you haven’t already.
A 13-year old Michigan boy has spent more than a week in a children’s hospital after he was forced to do push-ups as a punishment in lieu of detention. Donell Dixon attends the David Ellis Academy in Detroit, and he was recently reprimanded for running through the halls and slamming lockers closed. When he was offered the choice of detention or push-ups, Donell chose the latter and is now suffering from Rhabdomyolysis, or over-exertion of the muscles.
Dixon claims that he did 100 push-ups while school officials are claiming that he performed 3 sets of 20 with water breaks in between. Regardless, his mother has met with an attorney, but none of the reports are very clear as to whether or not she’s pursuing legal action. My guess is that she will, seeing as her son has spent a week in a hospital peeing blood with a serious kidney ailment. But according to WXYZ ABC news in Michigan, both his mother and the school are praying for his full recovery, as they should.
News report including an interview with his mother after the jump, and I’m throwing this question out there – Are push-ups, or exercise and physical exertion in general, an acceptable form of discipline in schools when administered and monitored by a school official?