There’s simply too much going on after two weeks of NFL action to limit my thoughts to just a few things, especially since I watch every single game with the focus of a drunken toddler. And since I’m also a self-loathing Miami Dolphins fan, I’m quickly turning my attention more to next year’s ultimate prize – screw the Super Bowl – Andrew Luck.

So welcome to the first installment of the “Suck for Luck” Power(less) Rankings, where we’ll be monitoring the crappier teams and their hopeless freefalls toward the No. 1 draft pick in the 2012 NFL Draft. A few notes before we begin:

1) The rankings in no way indicate actual draft orders, as they’re just my week-to-week opinions. They also do not represent teams that necessarily need a QB, so don’t argue that certain teams wouldn’t draft Luck. Even if a team with a QB winds up with that top pick, they’ll still trade it for a desperate team’s entire draft.

B) Please remember that all power rankings are just, in fact, opinion and in no way represent actual standings or any kind of impact on the actual game.

III) This is mostly just a way for us fans of lousy teams to fend off sports depression and suicide threats. Damn you, 7-day waiting periods.

Now on with the fun…

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When other people do power rankings, they’re pointless and stupid. When we do Power Rankings, they kick all kinds of ass.

1. Kronum. This game is part football, part soccer, part rugby and just generally insane. Watch this explanation of how it’s played now, because nobody will be playing it in three years. Via Deuce Of Davenport.

2. Bacon. We’re being gouged by the pork companies! Thanks, Weed Against Speed.

3. TCU’s Rose Bowl Championship Rings. They almost makes up for their ugly new jerseys. Almost.

4. The Genealogical Awareness Of Nick O’Leary. Imagine your grandfather being Jack Nicklaus and you not even knowing it before he took you to Augusta National as his caddy for the Par 3 tournament. Of course Nick is going to play football at Florida State.
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When other sites down power rankings, they’re pointless and stupid. When we do Power Rankings, they kick so much ass, even in slideshow format.

Sometimes you make it in life and sometimes you miss, and sometimes the ball just sits on the damn block, taunting your efforts. But you did it; you made it through another week. Check your watch. It’ll be beer thirty any minute. In the meantime, we have a handful of videos, images and anecdotes to help you finish out your day. Weekend Picks will pop up tomorrow. You know, on the weekend. Hope to see you then.

Thanks, Michael, for the heads-up on this clip. Read the rest of this entry »

When other sites do power rankings, they’re pointless and ridiculous. When we get around to Power Rankings, they kick so much ass.

1. The SI Swimsuit Issue. If you missed my interview with Alyssa Miller earlier this week, you can read it here and see all of the models here.

2. Dead horses in England. Two racehorses died suddenly in the UK last weekend in a parade ring. Authorities suspect an underground electrical current. I suspect airborne horse AIDS.

3. The draft stock of Cam Newton. Despite what I think of him, some NFL personnel people have him No. 1 on their boards, and ESPN’s Todd McShay has him tenth. I’m not saying he won’t be great. I’m just saying that there’s plenty of room for debate.

4. The Washington City Paper Legal Defense Fund. If you hate Dan Snyder and have a few bucks to put toward his demise, this might be worth your time.

5. The end of H-O-R-S-E at NBA All-Star Weekend. I personally think it’s pointless if you don’t give the original shooter a letter if everyone behind him makes the same shot. You’ll just have to settle for basketball’s biggest names jogging downcourt on defense.

6. Bacon. Did you know you can get a bacon donut just off the campus of Southern Cal? My opinion of the Pac-10 has just skyrocketed.

7. The drunkenness of Charlie Sheen. If you missed his impromptu appearance on ‘The Dan Patrick Show”, you can listen to the whole thing here. And honestly, a coke-and-whores addiction isn’t nearly as bizarre as a grown man teaching himself to hit lefty.

8. Bill Simmons. Sounds like the Sports Guy is building his own little Deadspin, circa 2005 (i.e.: before the days of dong). Independent branding? Check. Great writers? Check. Limited commenter base? Got that, too.

9. Boob Doubling. Katy Mixon talks about about our favorite scene ever from “Eastbound & Down”. Consider it a two-fer.

10. NASCAR. Between thermal cams at Daytona this weekend and the addition of Travis Pastrama, they’ll win the casual fanbase back in no time.

With Leather’s power rankings are our way of giving back to the community, fulfilling a court-sentenced community service requirement for the staff’s drunken debauchery. This week, their straight from the brain of Ryan Walsh, an incredibly handsome and mysterious With Leather contributor; these were his favorite sports stories from 2010.

From a critical perspective, 2010 was a pretty revolutionary year in sports coverage. A young Ryan Walsh quickly emerged as one of the internet’s rising young stars, everybody and their hot cousin started a podcast, and ESPN quoted almost as many tweets as actual newspapers. The world became more digitally connected by the day; and with the rise of smart phones and 3G networks, degenerates like myself could devote even more time to tracking scores, fantasy updates, and Brett Favre’s many failures instead of wasting our time with family and friends.

But the ability to cover the world of sports would be obsolete without the sports stories themselves. This is a list of ten that managed to get more than a ‘meh’ from my pouty, handsome lips.
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When other sports outlets do power rankings, they’re shallow and pedantic. When we do Power Rankings, they kick all kinds of ass.

1. Bacon. Finally, you can have it for dessert. Well done, bacon. Well done, indeed. Thanks, Weed.

2. Kyle Shanahan. He’s not getting handled by Donovan McNabb, and that’s awesome.

3. Fighting your own teammate in the stands. More of this please, and I’ll start watching college basketball in December.

4. A counterpoint to Christmas cheer. It’s the new “Bah Humbug.”

5. The amorous advances of Rex Ryan. He likes feet? Maybe I should try feet. Anyway, LSUFreek does it again, via KSK.

6. Corgis. Enjoy Ufford’s Very Corgi Christmas.

7. Memory Foam. The Knicks’ Danilo Gallinari loves it.

8. Crazy people. It’s true: happiness is a form of craziness.

9. Sponsoring LeBron’s birthday party. A 12-page slideshow shows how you–YES, YOU!–can sponsor LeBron’s birthday tour. How much do I have to pay to watch the Delonte West sex tape?

10. Hedo Turkoglu. A man of Magic once again. And he’s huge in Delaware.