Most NBA players like to head out after a tough road game to sample whatever local strange might be available. The Portland Trail Blazers Rudy Fernandez, playing with his team in Dallas last night, didn’t have to wait that long.
During a timeout with 41 seconds left in regulation, two women walked onto the court and into the Trail Blazers huddle. One woman wrapped her arms around the waist of Blazers guard Rudy Fernandez from behind. Fernandez, who was not in the game but focused on the plays being diagrammed by coach Nate McMillan, was stunned.
The women were ushered away from the huddle, and amazingly allowed to return to their courtside seats under the basket and watch the remainder of the game, which went to overtime. –The Oregonian, via Inside Hoops.
How could security pass up a chance to tackle a couple of intoxicated women? The safety of the players on the court is paramount. Those women should have been ushered to a private area and searched thoroughly for weapons. Uh, for security purposes. We can’t be too careful, especially when we’re this horny and drunk with power.
Quick follow-up to our Greg Oden post from yesterday: the Blazers big man came out and apologized for the pictures that made the rounds on the internet. The long and the short of it is that Oden took the phots about a year-and-a-half ago for some woman; he found about his big moment via 6 AM phone call yesterday. There’s a morning wood joke in there someplace but I’m already running behind today. There’s video of the presser on Deadspin (I like calling them pressers; sue me), but really, his face really doesn’t deviate from this expression throughout the whole two minutes. I guess he’s a man of few words. Many inches, but few words.
I spent the better part of my morning trolling the Series of Tubes trying to find a picture of a black man’s penis and I’m exhausted. How does your mother do it every night? But seriously, Greg Oden’s dick has suddenly become the perfect analogy for life as a sports blogger: I don’t really want to post it, but everyone else is, so I feel like I kind of have to. It’s like Oden’s cock is some nuclear peacekeeping missile defense system, and we’re all in a rush to get our own, uh, piece.
But anyway, if you want to Greg Oden in all his nude glory, for whatever reason, you can find an embeddable slideshow here. And not to sound gay or anything, but the missile analogy hits pretty close to home. And if you do head over there, we’ll have something back here to wash your brain out here very soon.
Portland’s Rudy Fernandez was carried off the floor in the third quarter of Portland’s win against the Lakers last night after taking an interesting foul from Trevor Ariza. After catching an elbow from behind, the Spaniard flailed and crashed to the floor. Fernandez’s salesmanship started a tussle between both teams, and Ariza was teed up and ejected. And just to ensure his cooter didn’t catch any more sand in it, Fernandez was hauled off on a stretcher wearing a neck brace. Wait, I thought the World Cup was next year.
Fernandez was conscious and alert when he left the court, and he had full movement of his extremities, the team said. But he was experiencing chest pain and was taken to a hospital overnight. X-rays were negative.
Trevor Ariza, who fouled Fernandez, said he hoped the rookie from Spain wasn’t seriously hurt.
“It wasn’t anything I was trying to do,” Ariza said. “I wasn’t trying to hurt him. I was just trying to make a play on the ball.” [Y! Deportes]
It was a tough foul, but hardly a neck-brace-worthy foul. Sparty and Friends dug up some video; Ariza makes contact with the head and possibly grabs the left arm on the way down. See for yourself after the jump. After the game, Fernandez underwent a CT scan, and the verdict was a soft-tissue injury to the upper chest and side. That differs slightly from Dr. Punte’s diagnosis: acute blubbering vaginosis. Sissy. Read the rest of this entry »
TrailBlazers general manager Kevin Pritchard has been in the news a lot recently, as he’s been going around threatening other NBA GMs with legal action if they pick up former Blazer Darius Miles, which could make it impossible for Portland to pick up a free agent this summer.
In a way more interesting story, Pritchard is dating former Blazers dancer Marlene Kanehailua, who once dated Kevin Duckworth, the former Blazers center who died last August. Except Pritchard’s wife’s name is Shea, and they have two kids together. (It’s unclear when Pritchard and his wife broke up. This photo from October 2008 incorrectly identifies Blazers assistant Joe Prunty as Pritchard, and thus shouldn’t be trusted as a source.)
Whatever the case, there have been some high-level fraternization and break-ups in the TrailBlazers’ family/organization. Here’s what the Internet says:
For those of you East Coasters who didn’t stay up until 1:45 a.m. to watch the conclusion of the Houston-Portland overtime game last night, you didn’t miss much. Just three lead changes in the final 1.9 seconds that ended with Brandon Roy making a 30-foot heave to turn a loss into a win at the buzzer. Ho-hum.
