A four-feet tall aluminum No. 8 that sat outside of Baltimore’s Camden Yards was stolen by four men arrested early this morning. The large No. 8 either is commemorating the career or Orioles legend Cal Ripken or denoting the number of ounces in a half-pound of crack. I hear they like the crack up there.
Police spokesman Anthony Guglielmi says surveillance camera footage shows the four men removing the monument and placing it in the back of a pickup truck.
They were later arrested in east Baltimore. The suspects are 18-year-old Patrick Reynolds, 19-year-old Jason Stonebuner, 19-year-old Matthew Rayner and 19-year-old Gary Parker. Parker is from Baltimore, while the other three are from Essex. via.
And that’s a damn shame, because I was all set to answer this Craigslist ad that Unsilent Majority found earlier today.
My uh..uncle made this for Cal Ripken. Does not want it anymore. makes a great lawn ordainment or paper weight over small annoying dogs. Maybe your favorite number is eight? I know mine is. $150 OBO. It is sitting in the back of my truck on Baltimore Street, I can get some strong crack heads to help lift it off for an extra $25.
What a joker. Everybody knows there’s no such thing as strong crackheads. That’s probably why the crackhead labor market is in the tank right now. $25 seems a little steep for people that would lick the side of a tree for loose change.
Three men were arrested yesterday and charged with the killing of Daniel Sale, the 22-year-old Phillies fan that was punched and kicked to death in the Citizens Bank Park parking lot. Francis Kirchner, 28, Charles Bowers, 35, and Jim Grove, 45
In 2006, Kirchner and some friends broke a man’s cheekbone in an unprovoked attack outside Moe’s. Kirchner was ordered by the court to undergo anger-management counseling [He's also on probation --Ed.].
In 1993, Bowers stabbed a man four times after they got into an argument at a Fishtown house party. In October 1995, he was sentenced to six to 23 months in prison for his conviction of assault and possession of an instrument of crime [He stabbed a 19-year-old with a butcher knife. --Ed].
The altercation started in nearby McFadden’s pub over a spilled drink, igniting an altercation between an estimated 30 or 40 people, all of which were thrown out of the bar.
A short distance from McFadden’s, Clark said, Kirchner, Bowers, and Grove jumped Sale in a parking lot.
“All three of them were beating him. At some point went down on all fours, and they started kicking him and stomping,” Clark said.
Frailty of life and all that. Philadelphia Police Commissioner Charles Ramsey noted that Sale was one of seven [SEVEN!] people killed over the weekend. That must have been one hell of a drink. Suddenly I don’t feel so ashamed of never leaving the house. This who thing is just unbelievable. via.
The officer, who was not identified in the report filed by the monolith, fired his duty weapon after what seemed like a botched carjacking after the officer and his family were leaving an Angels game:
The officer, who was walking to his car with his wife and two small children about 25 minutes after the game, was hit in the head with beer bottles, police Sgt. Tim Schmidt said.
The officer called a dispatcher at his department and asked for help, saying two men had choked him and asked him to get away from his car, Sgt. Rick Martinez said.
The off-duty officer then shot the men with his duty weapon, Martinez said. Police did not immediately identify the officer or the shooting victims
One of the two men is in critical condition; the other in stable condition. But I have an envelope here on my desk marked “Carjacking Jokes” and I was totally ready for…oh, never mind. It’s empty. I should probably point out that I’m the only one referring to it as a carjacking, but I’m not the final authority on these things, and that’s probably good. Up until 2005, I thought Pat Benatar was a guy.
And no, it wasn’t to Taco Bell for their newest menu item, the Pitaphile, which is now on sale for 99 cents (but if you’re 12 or younger, it’s free). NFL draft bust Ryan Leaf was finally caught at the US-Canada border near Washington. Leaf was indicted on nine felony counts by a Texas grand jury in May, stemming from breaking into a college football players house and stealing his painkiller medication. From Y! Sports:
James Farren, the district attorney in Randall County in West Texas, said Leaf was arrested Wednesday by federal customs agents. Legal assistant Jennifer Bonstein said Leaf declined to waive extradition during a hearing Wednesday afternoon in Bellingham, Wash., about 90 miles north of Seattle.
Bill Kelly, Leaf’s attorney in Texas, said his client was returning to Texas to turn himself in by a Thursday deadline.
“I assume when he was crossing the border, they picked him up,” Kelly said.
Actually, that headline should probably indicate that Leaf was picked up on his return to the United States from Canada. Apparently all you need to get into Canada is a disappointing resume’. I have no idea why they call it the Great White North. I mean, have you ever seen a shark in Canada?
Former NFL wide receiver Anthony Mix was indicted on a misdemeanor sex charge in Alabama. So I guess we can rule out anything to do with sheep, livestock or cattle. Wait, sheep aren’t cattle, are they? From NJ.com:
Bay Minette police Sgt. Lester Banfield said Tuesday the former Auburn player is charged with a misdemeanor count of contributing to the delinquency of a minor. The indictment alleges that Mix had sex with a 15-year-old girl in January in his hometown of Bay Minette.
Banfield said because the charge is a misdemeanor, investigators will likely have to wait until Mix turns himself in or pick him up when he is in town.
Or you could just leave a 15-year-old girl under a giant cardboard box, tipped up only by a stick with a string tied around it. He walks under the box, you pull the string…bada bing. Of course you’d be leaving him trapped with a 15-year-old girl for some undetermined length of time. I guess I really haven’t thought that part through…
Yankees pitcher Joba Chamberlain got a DUI this off-season, but that really doesn’t seem like such a big deal, given that his estranged mother was just busted for dealing meth in Nebraska. Allegedly, of course. Because people get framed for selling meth to undercover cops all the time.
Jacqueline Standley was arrested at her apartment Saturday night, Lincoln Police Capt. David Beggs said Monday.
Beggs said she sold 1 gram of a substance believed to be meth to an officer for $110 on Feb. 11. The substance was confirmed as meth at the state laboratory. |Newsday|
Aww, look at her. Such a sad face. You can see where Joba inherited his jowls. A jury would sooner convict a bloodhound. Besides, in her defense, meth is pretty much the only thing to do in Nebraska.
