I once thought that a great idea for a magazine would be Haters – “The publication devoted to people who hate sh*t.” It was my billion dollar idea until I learned that things take effort and I hate that sh*t. But lately I’ve realized that my idea would have just been a knock off of the magazine that already has hate down pat – Forbes.

When it’s not busy hating people who don’t have money, Forbes is going out of its way to compile lists of people and things that we all hate. This week, it’s the annual list of the Most Hated Athletes in America. Sure, they call it the Most Disliked Athletes, but read between the capitalist lines, amigos.

So who, pray tell, are the most heinous and villainous prick athletes in all of the land, Forbes?

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"Haha, I'm toally gonna stay in school."

Now that “Suck For Luck” is a full blown ordeal – there’s even a Twitter account devoted to it – it’s very amusing to see the general NFL fan’s reaction to the idea that teams might tank some games to secure the guy every analyst this side of Mel Kiper’s phallic eagle swoop is calling the next John Elway.

It’s public knowledge now that both Indianapolis Colts owner Jim Irsay and Miami Dolphins majority owner Stephen Ross have expressed interest in acquiring Luck in the draft. So the rational school of thought for the average fan – I’d probably estimate an I.Q. of 75 – is that two teams of professional athletes, who are boisterous, arrogant and proud, will waste an entire season of their professional careers so they can put their fates in the hands of a guy from Stanford.

There are two things about this, as a Miami Dolphins fan, that crack me up:

1) Why on Earth would Tony Sparano and his coaching staff kowtow to Ross, who openly courted Jim Harbaugh to replace him? Why would Sparano fill the cupboard with elite talent only to have it handed to Bill Cowher in the spring?

2) And do you really think that Brandon Marshall would keep his mouth shut if someone told him to flop on some plays? He’d be demanding trades and stomping his feet to the point that Terrell Owens would be like, “Dude, chill.” Besides, he looked just fine flopping on his own last night.

Now the Colts on the other hand, they seem like they would do it and not give a crap. After all, if any of their older guys complain, they can easily be traded for draft picks. I’m sure that thought is cemented firmly in Irsay’s mind. That’s why, as I was perusing Twitter during last night’s Monday Night Football game, there was a hilarious double standard at work.

If the Colts lose a game, they get to blame Peyton Manning’s injury and nobody thinks twice. But if the Dolphins lose, they’re just sucking on purpose to get Luck. I have some news for you all – Miami really is that terrible. It’s just funny that people seem more willing to allow the Colts to put Luck behind Manning, like they’re being dumped by Marisa Miller while preparing for their date with Kate Upton.

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"Hey Plaxico, YOU SUCK!"

We’re all a little bit better off when we have more Joe Namath in our lives, so it’s great that he sat down with ESPN New York the other day to talk about the one thing that he knows better than anything else – hot skank poonany the New York Jets passing game. The Jets’ offense clearly looks different from last season, as they replaced Braylon Edwards and Jerricho Cotchery with Plaxico Burress and Derrick Mason. While they may be a little older, they sure cut down on the “Whoops, gotta hold on to that” department.

But Namath isn’t so sure about Burress’ status, as he seems to think that his time in the clink and away from the field is going to be damaging to his success this season.

“When I see Burress, certainly in the past, and Edwards, their route running and adjusting, I didn’t like it — and I still don’t. I’ll be surprised if Burress and Sanchez click well, and I’ll be even more surprised if Burress, after being laid off for two years and change, is going to make it through the season.”

Easy now, Broadway Joe. We’re talking about a man who shot himself in the leg and had the benefit of top notch prison rehabilitation and training. You’re worried about his ankles and feet? I’m worried about some young defender putting a cheap hit on Burress and him retaliating in the shower after the game. I’m worried about him filling the Gatorade cooler with toilet wine.

Besides, you know that Rex Ryan has every player’s ankles and feet as his top priority.

So we’re back to football. Almost.

The NFL players’ association have agreed to the terms that the owners set forth in their CBA proposal from Friday. While the rank-and-file players still have to approve the 10-year agreement in a vote later today, there is strong indication that they will, and that the NFL lockout will end later today after 136 days.

The goal is for the NFLPA to present the completed document to its 13-man executive committee between 11 a.m. to noon ET on Monday, with a vote to follow. Some members of the executive committee aren’t expected to arrive in D.C. until the 11 o’clock hour. The player rep call will include a briefing of the deal and, in particular, changes since last Wednesday’s meeting.

The player reps would then vote on the deal. After that, the 10 plaintiffs in the Brady et al v. the National Football League et al lawsuit would have to sign off, which is fully expected.

At this point, what remains is “a few small points” in the language, according to a source.

–NFL.com

Tomorrow, rookies would be able to sign, players could be traded, and free agents would be allowed to negotiate with teams, but those players won’t be able to sign before Friday. The more interesting wrinkle of the current proposal is that all NFL teams would have to spend 99 percent of the cash in their available salary cap (which will be about $120 million). While some teams will struggle to get under that number, that’s big for teams like Cincinnati and Tampa Bay, who some people expect to find themselves at $50 million below that number or more. Hell, with $50 million, the Bengals could sign Dominique Strauss-Kahn and Casey Anthony and still have cap room left to buy Plaxico Burress a new pair of sweatpants.

Dungy hopes that NFL teams will take a chance on Burress. He feels that Burress will no longer take anything for granted and will make better decisions.

“I’ve been with Mike (Vick) and I’ve seen how kids flock to him, and I think we’ll see the same thing with Plaxico,” Dungy said.

That was the punchline of today’s Plaxico Burress press conference, wherein the National Urban League promised a “major announcement” and delivered Plaxico saying he was partnering with the National Urban League (cough) and the Brady Center to combat gun violence. I’m glad urban youths now have a strong role model to keep them from putting a gun in their sweatpants, going to a club and accidentally gun violencing themselves in the leg.

Plaxico’s announcement might as well have been labeled “Now That’s What I Call a Disgraced Athlete, Volume 1″, including chart topping hits like “I want to see every child succeed”, “I can make a difference”, and “Magic Johnson is going to mentor me and keep me from making any more bad decisions”. Well, okay, that last one wasn’t a hit (and didn’t really make sense if you listened to the lyrics), but Magic and NBC analyst (and nothing else) Tony Dungy were present to thumbs-up their mentorship. Dungy added, “Lol I ran after his car as he was leaving jail.”

So, will this make Plaxico look more appealing to NFL teams? Would you rather your kid learn not to shoot people from a guy who has never shot anyone, or has shot someone (“Himself” counts as someone) but is famous? We want to hear your opinion, so let us know what you think in our comments section. Or just lean out of your window and shout it at passersby, and I guess eventually I will hear about it.

I can’t claim to know a lot about women’s mixed martial arts (except that as a sport, it is arguably creepier to enjoy than joshi), but Gina Carano always seems caught between fighting legitimacy and Anna Kournikovafication, where she’s a naturally gifted athlete but people don’t really care if she wins or not as long as she’s around, because her torso is (was?) amazing to look at. She really did have an amazing torso. I could picture myself battling Shadows of the Colossus on that thing.

Sports

Gina Carano Had Medical Clearance, Pulled Out Anyway - As the comments suggest, “having no chance of making weight” is now a medical condition. I think Gina should just fight super lady heavyweights at whatever weight she is, because she’s still cute, and I’d like to see her Fedor a bunch of giants. [Cage Potato]

‘Plaxico! Oh, How I Missed You!’ - I think writing about Plaxico makes you a racist. It does, I can’t bring myself to do it anymore. I type “Plaxico” and before I’ve even published, somebody is logging a furious comment about how I think “thugs” are ruining sports. I’m just gonna write some more about Tom Brady. [KSK]

The Best Of The Annual Oklahoma D-Day Paintball Games - If you enjoyed the paintball episode of “Community”, this is a great look at how crazy real live paintball wars can be. Make it through the Apocalypse Now-looking people at the beginning and get to those awesome paint clouds. [With Leather]

The Best and Worst of WWE Raw 6/6 - Speaking of creepy things to enjoy, be sure to catch this week’s Best and Worst, wherein I praise a black guy for wearing a Confederate army uniform. Also, I’ve been watching that gif of Kelly Kelly for like 20 hours. [With Leather]

Not Sports

Do you try to eat healthy? You might have an eating disorder - Great, I thought being a vegan was a SOLUTION to my eating disorders. Oh well. To celebrate my descent into ED madness, here’s a picture of one of my favorite hot vegans, Drew McIntyre’s allegedly crazy ex-wife “Tiffany.” [Fark]

The 100 Funniest Brits - This is also a pretty solid list for the 100 Ugliest Brits. Thankfully this is in no particular order, so I don’t have to get pissed about Eddie Izzard and Ali G being less funny than Emma f**king Thompson. [Buzzfeed]

Six Panels Of Penny Arcade Get Movie Deal - Just great. Maybe now we can finally greenlight that “A Softer World” movie, which is just a still photo of someone smoking zoomed in three times with some vague, hipster narration. Here, I’ll write one right now. “I thought you said to wait for you. But here I’m waiting. Until tomorrow.” That’s a trilogy. [Gamma Squad]

Facebook Fail-Log: June Edition - I should’ve contributed any and all Facebook-related conversations that sprung from my Joe Rogan post last week. I’ve never seen so many people try to make a point, then ruin it by trying to shoehorn in a funny “cunt” at the end. [Uproxx]