The above image of a pizza order was posted to Reddit over the weekend, as a Vancouver Canucks fan ordered his tropical chicken pizza for pickup on Friday night, presumably at the start of the third period, when Vancouver was trailing the San Jose Sharks 1-0. But Ryan Kesler tied the game within the first minute of the period, and that customer’s order quickly changed to delivery. Seven minutes later, the pizza seemingly became a hockey celebration prize, as the Canucks went up 2-1. Then it became an overtime feast when the Sharks tied the game at 2 late in the third. Finally, it became a feast of depression, as the Canucks lost 3-2 in overtime.

While I certainly feel for this fan… who eats chicken on a pizza? Gross, bros.

Read the rest of this entry »

As I mentioned last week, the Air Sex National Championships went down in Austin, TX, on Friday night. If you’ve never seen Air Sex, it’s a (for lack of a better term) head-to-head competition where performers execute no-holds-barred imaginary f**k-sessions on stage for the enjoyment of an audience of folks trying not to throw up. Brooklyn Decker was there in the crowd, apparently. I was on stage as a judge, because (1) I’ve been lucky enough to judge a few of these during its most recent touring schedule, and (2) I am not even ABOUT to pretend-hump something in front of Brooklyn Decker.

I put together a gallery of the show’s best and most iconic images (with the help of my good buddy Lex Lybrand of Wear The Cheese), and here’s a quick guide to what you’ll see as you flip through it:

Read the rest of this entry »

Get the door, it’s crippling stomach problems.

Takeru Kobayashi, the world famous competitive eater and six-time champion of Nathan’s Hot Dog Eating Contest, guzzled down a whole 12-inch pizza pie in exactly one minute while hanging out at a Super Bowl Party on Sunday. (via The Daily What)

Kobayashi’s effort, which is more or less the exact opposite of Avoiding The Noid, is after the jump. Viewer warning: it contains the grosses thing a person can do*.

*eat Domino’s pizza

Read the rest of this entry »

Wait, am I doing this right?

All right, I promised that I was going to stop writing about controversial topics or inciting passionate debate, but I have to get this off my chest. My rankings of the best major fast food pizza chains are as follows:

1) Little Caesars
2) Papa John’s
3) Hungry Howie’s
4) Pizza Hut
5) Domino’s Pizza

There. That feels better. Now, please keep in mind that I don’t eat any from any of these companies that often, as I prefer to eat local and fresh. I’ve also seen what happens behind the scenes in random stores of some of those companies, and let’s just say it was boogerific.

I have a soft spot for Little Caesars, though, because their $5 Hot N Ready pepperoni pizzas got me through some tough times in college, and every once in a while I think about trying to house one of them for old time’s sake. Then I check my latest cholesterol count and I cry into a bowl of celery.

In conclusion, hooray bowl games!

Read the rest of this entry »