The awesomeness is emanating out of No Mas like butter through the pores of an obese child being chased down the street. This is an incredibly well-done animated short from James Blagden chronicling what might have happened to Pittsburgh Pirates pitcher Dock Ellis before his famous June 12, 1970 no-hitter against San Diego. Ellis claims he was on LSD at the time, and really the only way this could be better is if you popped a blotter yourself before watching.
As if Miami of Ohio choking away the college hockey title wasn’t enough–the Reds chipped in for a little Fail of their own (yes, Strunk and White suggest capitalizing the word when used as a noun). It’s the first triple play the Pirates had turned since 1993. On the flipside, Adam Dunn would have hit into that triple play in such a lackadaisical manner that it would have suggested that the team could have done better if everyone was actually trying. I’ll miss that. Somewhat.
The Pittsburgh Pirates have signed Rinku Singh and Dinesh Patel, the 20-year-olds from India who were the top finishers in “Million Dollar Arm,” an Indian reality TV show that searched for potential MLB talent in the country with a gazillion people playing cricket.
The two have worked with a pitching coach since May, and earlier this month 30 pro scouts came to watch their tryout in Arizona. Other tidbits from the article:
“The Pirates are committed to creatively adding talent to our organization,” Pirates general manager Neal Huntington said Monday.
It’s a departure from the policy of the last 15 years or so, which was being committed to adding no talent whatsoever.
When they first came to the United States and began playing catch, the pitchers were mystified by the concept of gloves and had to [be] taught not to try to catch the ball with their bare hands.
Ha ha! It’s funny because they’re uncivilized animals! Joke about them now, but the Pirates will be the ones laughing when they’re paying their Cy Young winners in cows. Although I suppose the cow is stronger than the dollar.
"Yesterday" by The Beatles is often said to be the most-covered song of all-time, so there isn't much more you can do to destroy its integrity. A woman named Julia Tucker, who's apparently styling herself as the female Ryan Parker in the way I style myself as the non-robot Bender, has this Yesterday-ripping paean to the greatness of Pirates' outfielder Jason Bay. As the video shows, there's so much to appreciate, from Bay's beady eyes, his relaxed but firm posture and even the bottom half of his shirt.
It may be lacking in complete nudity, but this one is actually more disturbing than the Hedo Turkoglu videos. The nudity is grainy and forgettable but the shrill warblings of this chick have raped my ear drums irreparably. Thanks much, Walkoff Walk.
We linked to this video from B&C in this morning's Saint Andrew's Net, but — like the tape in The Ring or the horse humpers video — it's far too troubling not to share on the largest scale possible.
This is Myron Cope, inventor of the Terrible Towel and the famed voice of the Steelers who died this year, doing a "U Can't Touch This" spin-off to honor the Pirates. If you for some reason can't watch YouTube videos on your computer, just imagine that the dwarf from "Twin Peaks" had died, then came back from the grave wearing parachute pants and rapping about a good baseball team from Pittsburgh spliced with footage of a wiry Barry Bonds. It's like that, except more likely to haunt your dreams. Or in my case, wet dreams. Oh, c'mon, I can't be the only one who's into dead dwarves.
"Saint Andrew's Net" is With Leather's daily link dump, written by the bane of respectable journos and scrupulous primates alike, Michael Tunison. Expect sports and tits.
Send your submissions for Saint Andrew's Net to withleather@gmail.com.
