… or “Randy Being Randy”.

Jerry Rice was never lazy. Even his idea of retirement hasn’t been lazy; he puts more work into out-foxtrotting Master P than I’ve put into anything in my life. So it makes sense that when asked about Randy Moss on ESPN Radio, the greatest wide receiver of all time would take personal offense to a guy who could’ve been even better had he ever woken up on time, tied his shoes properly or given a sh*t. Via a transcript of the appearance courtesy of Pro Football Talk:

“It was hard for me to swallow because I was not as talented and I had to work harder. To see a guy with that much talent not give it 100 percent, it was almost like a little slap in the face. But Randy was Randy.

“He could have been one of the greatest if he had worked just a little bit harder. I don’t think he wanted to give it 100 percent. You never knew what you were going to get with Randy. Sometimes you’d get the unbelievable guy, the amazing guy. Other times you’d get the guy that took a couple plays off.”

It’s an understandable beef, understandable to the point of being indisputable, really, because who hasn’t dogpiled on Randy Moss about being lazy at this point? And I’m sure they don’t have anything to do with Rice being brought on by ESPN as an NFL analyst or ESPN’s incessant need to say controversial things to make news about people who play sports. I came [ ] this close to getting a job at ESPN by sending them 30,000 words about how stupid Tom Brady’s hair looks. They asked me to write something about Brett Favre’s stop-and-go retirement and I choked. I mean, what could one possibly say about that?

Anyway, best case scenario is that in ten years Rice is still the greatest WR ever and makes chuckleface on ESPN every Sunday afternoon, and Randy Moss gains 50 pounds and tells himself how good he could’ve been in the dressing room mirror.

Now that we’ve all calmed down from last week’s controversial running back rankings, I figured it was time to start the week off on the wrong foot with an equally controversial and debatable fantasy football wide receivers ranking. However, I don’t think that it will be the receivers and where I have them ranked that will fire everyone up, as much as it will be the means in which I group them – 80s TV sitcom daughters. I know, we’re like Harvard and MIT had a big, stupid baby after a drunken weekend in Cancun.

After all, let’s look at what happened since I posted that RB feature:

- The Kansas City Chiefs signed LeRon McClain, which means that Jamaal Charles might get one touchdown this season. Meanwhile, Ray Rice is all by himself. I’ve never said that our readers aren’t smarter than me.
- Mikel Leshoure tore his ACL and will miss the entire season for the Detroit Lions.
- Ashley Tisdale showed up at a gym looking like this. It’s just baffling.

As for the football meat of this ranking, I always have a lot of fun picking my wide receivers, because this is where you can really find some hidden gems, especially if you’re in a standard format league and you start 3 WRs or 2 WRs and 1 RB/WR flex spot. But of course there are also always the standard studs, definitive duds, and those guys who are just good enough to keep that one guy in your league sending trade offers for your top RBs all season long.

Oh, and if you couldn’t already tell by that banner pic, it’s pretty obvious who the No. 1 choice is.

Is that "4th Down" Freddie Mitchell stepping out at a Vegas nightclub? According to my sources, it certainly is. And it appears that his lovely date has undone a button for every wide receiver more talented than him that was picked after him in the 2001 NFL Draft. Yes, there's a button for Steve Smith, one for Chad Johnson, and even one for Reggie Wayne. Why was this scene important enough to photograph? It seems George Clooney's girlfriend (above) was at this soirée as well – she looks like a fun girl. Anyway, enjoy clicking through the whole gallery of party-goers while I attend to some assistant editor duties (i.e. recuperate from hangover). Careful, some of the pics aren't even safe for your day of rest.

By the way, Clooney is starring in a new pigskin film – you can read an expert review at Film Drunk. The movie is about football, so that's why I'm mentioning it. The pigskin reference? I was talking about Renee Zellweger. -KD