Ever wanted to know what it looks like to fall down an icy mountain? Yeah, I bet this guy didn’t, either.

Dramatic scenes showing a climber’s 100ft (30m) fall down a gully on Snowdon have been published online.

Climber and a safety consultant Mark Roberts, 47, was wearing a head camera when he lost his grip despite using ice axes, plunging over rocks and snow.

“You just try not to panic and hope there’s some luck with you,” he tells the British Mountaineering Council website which has posted his film.

I’m not sure what to add other than “thank goodness this guy’s okay” and maybe “OH MY GOD DUDE YOU FELL DOWN A MOUNTAIN,” but this is one of those clips you should watch and experience. It’s really beautiful, in a way. I imagine Heaven is a lot like that skyline. I imagine Hell is like having a mountain’s worth of rocks jammed into your ass as you fall off an icy f**king mountain.

My only advice to this climber: never try Zorbing.

[via BBC]

“Doing segway” is a sport, right? It’s a thing with wheels. That’s sports enough for me.

Anyway, World Wide Interweb’s latest video of Segway fails is delightful, and a lengthy, illustrated example of why we should not create those Wall-E chairs that let us float around as fat people in space. Highlights include the girl in the banner image running into a wall and getting trapped under her own giant walking device, a bomb squad guy (?) faceplanting, and that horrible thing that happens where you try to catch your balance and end up crotching yourself on the handlebars.

Video is below.

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Hey, want to see a soccer player try to stick his entire arm up another player’s ass?

I’ve complained a lot lately about people interrupting soccer matches with explosives, but having watched this clip, I’d prefer that over the alternative. This is Saudi Premier League midfielder Modeste M’bami going elbow-deep on Khaled Al-Zaylai and getting away with it, and I guess the silver lining here is that he didn’t pull out with one of Al-Zaylai’s kidneys.

In the 50th minute of a match between M’bami’s Ittihad and Al Nassr, Al-Zaylai was tripped from behind and fell on the ball. Ex-Camerooon international M’bami was eager to get his opponent away from the ball, so as the ref blew his whistle for the foul, M’bami jammed his hand up Al-Zaylai’s backside as if he was trying to use the Saudi midfielder as a ventriloquist’s dummy. Though Al-Zaylai clearly didn’t appreciate this, he remained surprisingly calm and didn’t retaliate as play continued. (via Dirty Tackle)

So yeah, bring on the grenades. I don’t know what’s scarier … the chance that your opponent might Shawshank Redemption you if you fall down, or the fact that the refs won’t do anything to him for throwing a forearm in you. If a guy decides he wants to uppercut me in the upper intestines, I demand swift justice.

Additional Note: I think we use the Reasons To Hate Soccer” tag more than we use Kate Upton.

Here’s a shot-for-shot reenactment of the Red Bull Space Jump (including a clearly labeled “Earth”), if you pretend like the roof of somebody’s house is “outer space,” and that Felix Baumgartner missed our planet completely and broke his ass on the moon. (via Bob’s Blitz)

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This clip of a Dutch soccer fan going Full Mr. Bean is funny enough, but it gets better the more you watch it. Pay attention to everyone else in the crowd. The guy who swats at the ball at the last second. The guy making “loser” gestures in the top right. So much to find and love. The joke, I guess, is that he fell onto his Netherlands. (via Holdout Sports)

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Yesterday we brought you over three minutes of people hurting themselves during a workout, so here’s a minute and a half of people hurting themselves trying to walk on ice. It’s called the ULTIMATE FALLING ON ICE COMPILATION, because SEO, but if my life on ice has been any indication, there is more than 112 seconds of footage. (via the most 2004 joke named website ever, World Wide Interwebs)

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