As we discussed yesterday, people were a bit perplexed when TNT NBA analyst Shaquille O’Neal was suddenly mentioned as a candidate for the vacant Orlando Magic GM position, because he’d spent the last decade completely pissing all over the franchise that drafted him No. 1 overall in 1992. Eventually, though, it made perfect sense when it was revealed that Shaq was being considered for the job because Shaq told everyone that, because he likes when everyone talks about him.

But Shaq tied up all the loose ends yesterday when he released a statement about how even though he told everyone he was interested in the Magic GM job, he wasn’t interested in the Magic GM job, adding: “I’m Shaq. Shaq Shaq Shaq.”

“When I first heard about the vacancy for the Orlando Magic general manager position, I was clearly intrigued. I was drafted by the Magic, I have a great love for the franchise, and I have made the city of Orlando my home. Additionally, I have great admiration and respect for the DeVos family. However, this is not a job I have an interest in pursuing. I feel very fortunate to be with TNT and to have the best job in sports. I look forward to many more years with Charles, Kenny and E.J. I wish the best for the Magic and I am confident that they will select a great GM and coach.” (Via Pro Basketball Talk)

The truth is, though, that Diesel’s schedule is just way too booked up right now. As you can see from the banner image – via The Superficial – Shaq is back to what he does best – making terrible movies. He’s currently filming the Happy Madison production Grown Ups 2, because all of the people who paid to see the first Grown Ups (my pick for Worst Film of 2010) said the same thing: “It was terrible, sure, but I feel like they could have made it worse.”

And because I’m in a retro flashback mood today, I’ve included a very important and relevant video after the jump.

And things obviously turned out well for Aaron Carter.

Have you heard the one about the superstar free agent center who left his team, citing myriad problems within the organization as well as his desire to leave behind a “small pond” market for stardom, and then spent the next decade constantly ripping that team at any chance he got for no good reason, ultimately focusing on its new superstar center, who admired and idolized him enough that he used the same nickname, with an inexplicable vitriol that was later passed off as “all in good fun”, eventually finding himself out of the media spotlight when his career ended, only to use that once-again-hurting franchise to make people talk about him, because, hey, what’s a river of bad blood beneath a burned bridge anyway?

*exhales*

Of course you haven’t, because it won’t happen. It can’t happen. Can it?

The Orlando Magic is set to meet with former star Shaquille O’Neal about the team’s vacant general manager position next week, ESPN reported Wednesday, citing sources.

O’Neal, who spent his first four NBA seasons in Orlando, would be an odd choice, given he has no front-office experience and has had a longstanding feud with Magic superstar Dwight Howard. (Via Fox Sports)

Yeah, about this… no. Not gonna happen, folks. You don’t “mutually agree” to let a guy who was terrible at his job walk away, only to bring in a guy who has not only never done that job come but has spent the length of Dwight Howard’s career criticizing him and calling him names. Because that would clearly make Howard stay.

On the other hand, it’s the Magic, so we should expect to hear the announcement any minute now. And he better make that panda his assistant GM.

I think we all need to take a seat, maybe form a circle and just relax for a few minutes. We get a little bit too crazy about sports sometimes, and we tend to overreact toward athletes and media analysts for their decisions and/or opinions. I mean, take Twitter, for example. Have you seen the horrible verbal venom that is spewed at famous people on that “social media” site on a daily basis? Hell, I’m as guilty as the next guy for making cracks at some athletes, but I’m talking about the violent threats.

It’s really getting out of hand, and it’s been spilling out into our stadiums and arenas now, ruining the idea of fun competition for everyone. What the hell’s the point of going to a game or a bar these days if you constantly have to look over your shoulder and wonder if someone is about to stab you? Sports are supposed to take our minds off the really sh*tty things in life and provide hope and inspiration. Instead, we have people slaughtering each other in the streets.

Everybody calm down and let’s remember why we’re here in the first place… to hope that the other team loses and pray for people to be fired. That’s what sports are all about, dang it.

Um, holy sh*t, you guys. For starters, 8 people were shot outside the Ford Center in Oklahoma City after the Thunder defeated the Los Angeles Lakers last night. AFTER THEY WON. And nobody was arrested. What the f*ck is going on with sports fans lately?

A pregnant woman was either kicked or hit in the abdomen, she said. Seven gunshot victims were found at the scene across several block around Reno Avenue and Mickey Mantle Drive, O’Leary said. There were about 5,000 people out in the area when the gunfire rang out, she estimates.. While one patient was critical late Monday, the other seven were “stable” O’Leary said Tuesday morning. (Via News OK)

How is this crap happening outside of an American professional sports arena? This is the kind of behavior that we expect from young soccer hoo… THIS JUST IN FROM OUR GREAT BRITAIN CARRIER PIGEON SERVICE: One man is dead and his father is in critical condition after they were repeatedly stabbed at a pub while watching a soccer game. Who did the stabbing?

A gang of 20 hooded youths stormed a pub after the Champions League final before dragging away a 25-year old man and stabbing him to death in scenes ‘like a horror film’, friends said today.

‘True gent’ Luke Fitzpatrick was killed and his father Bernard, who threw himself on top of his son in a desperate attempt to shield him, remains in a critical condition in hospital after being stabbed four times. (Via the Daily Mail)

I’m never leaving my house again.

I know that some people don’t care my homer rants, so just a quick thought on the Orlando Magic “relieving” Stan Van Gundy of his coaching duties and “letting” Otis Smith “resign”: The Magic haven’t done anything and can’t do anything to convince Dwight Howard to stay short of moving the team to New York and signing Deron Williams. All signs indicate he does not want to stay, either because the grass is greener with his boy Deron or he knows that no matter what the Magic do they won’t be able to contend with the Chicago Bulls, Miami Heat, New York Knicks and even the Indiana Pacers moving forward. That is, unless a GM is stupid enough to trade for Jason Richardson and Chris Duhon, which I won’t ever rule out in the NBA.

Prediction: The Magic hire Donnie Walsh as GM and Brian Shaw as coach, and Howard will still leave.

(GIF via Jose 3030)

Joanie Laurer, AKA Chyna, has been out promoting the porn parody Avengers XXX, in which she plays the She Hulk, which you can make fun of all you want but you know you want to watch out of morbid curiosity. Unfortunately, the whirlwind tour has taken its toll on the former WWE superstar as she fainted before she was supposed to make an appearance at the Exxotica Expo in Miami this past weekend. Despite earlier reports, she was not hospitalized.

“I wasn’t taken to the hospital, but to my hotel room where I rested a bit,” Chyna says. “It’s weird because I’ve been feeling so good lately, almost like She-Hulk, my character in Vivid’s Avengers XXX. But then I started to get a cold and feel weary. I think I overdid it with the cold medicine and a glass of wine at lunch today. I feel much better now and intend to go out to the pool.” (Via E!)

Chyna, from all of us to all of you, please take a break. Not from living your life, but from porn. It doesn’t have to be forever, just until I die.

Maxim Magazine still exists? released its annual Hot 100 list this week, naming super duper model and eventual billionaire Bar Refaeli the hottest woman in the world. This comes on the heels of People naming Beyonce the Sexiest Woman in the world and something called Zoo Magazine awarding that same honor to Kim Kardashian, most likely so she could waddle up to Jay Z’s wife at a party and be like, “Aside from the talent, we’re practically the same.”

Regardless, here comes the wave of bloggers and Tweeters crying foul as if this is the greatest injustice we currently face, because “MILA IS HOTTER!” “NO, KATE UPTON IS HOTTER!” “SCREW YOU, GIRLS I KNOW IN REAL LIFE ARE HOTTER!” and so on.

Why is this important? Because as the Summer Olympics approach, I think it’s our duty as Americans to support Alex Morgan more.

(Images via here and here)

Speaking of… Mila Kunis is apparently a big Los Angeles Dodgers fan, which was a huge oversight on my part and will be included in my amended fan map later this week. She also makes the Dodgers sweeping the Cardinals much easier for me.

(Image via NewsGab, Hat tip)

The people behind the San Alfonso del Mar resort in Chile spent $1 billion over the past 5 years to build a swimming pool that is bigger than 5 Olympic-sized pools. But before you ask why… no, just go ahead and ask why, because I have no f*cking clue what the purpose of this thing is, other than to use it to ambush zombies during the eventual genetic plague Apcoalypse.

The pool costs $2 million annually to maintain, which means I’m going to have to drink a lot of Mountain Dew to pee in this thing sufficiently.

Rumors have been circulating – HOTGOSS! – that NBA free agent and former ambassador to China, J.R. Smith, has been dating pop singer Rihanna, who is apparently the easiest gossip column Mad Libs answer for a male celebrity needing a romantic partner. But if it’s true, Smith is about to be pissssssssssssssed, because Rihanna was apparently clubbing it up with Didier Drogba, who I’m told plays soccer.

Obviously, this is all part of Rihanna’s plan to sleep with every man on Earth. See you in 2046, Rihanna!

Most baseball fans and even some St. Louis Cardinals fans don’t care too much for Tony La Russa, but he won two World Series in the past six years, so I have a soft spot for the guy. Since he’s retired, everyone can now enjoy ignoring him, unless they love doggies, because look at that picture.

As my buddy and Joe Sports Fan writer and podcaster extraordinaire Matt Sebek reminded us yesterday, La Russa and his family – including his wonderful daughter Bianca (R) – spend most of their free time helping animals. Basically, if you hate La Russa, you hate animals. Yeah, I don’t expect that argument to hold up either.

I’m a big golf lover, despite sucking, so I’m getting a pretty big kick out of golfers being pissed off at Britney Spears, who has apparently taken up the game as a source of relaxation while predictably being terrible at it.

However, fellow golfers have been struggling to deal with Britney’s inability to play the game as she regularly lets go of her club and cannot hit the ball.

A source told The Sun newspaper: “It’s heads-up when she’s around. She’s hit a few golfers and managed to land balls in golf carts. But she’s a good sport and laughs at herself.” (Via AZ Central)

If ever a golf course has needed an alligator attack, it’s now.

Black Eyed Peas guy-who-talks-fast Will.i.am apparently got to carry the Olympic torch. Gee, I hope this means he’ll perform.

Welcome to my day-late weekly predictions that will astound and amaze you, because they’re so incredibly tuned into to a psychic frequency that nobody else on this planet could come up with them. Since I started making predictions a few weeks ago, I’ve been right about everything. Even the stuff that might have been wrong was technically right, because I say it was. It’s not really hard being a psychic.

This week, we take a look into the crystal ball to see if David Stern really will stick to his guns and stop the L.A. Clippers from flopping, Matt Leinart can turn Carson Palmer into the perfect QB and if anyone would ever believe that Phil Jackson would even remotely entertain the idea of coaching a team as dysfunctional and broken as the Orlando Magic. SIM SIM SALABIM!

A few years ago, NBA commissioner David Stern said that the league was going to take flopping a lot more seriously and start handing out fines to players who were busted auditioning for their Best Actor awards during games. Nothing happened. Nobody ever got in trouble, despite players flopping this way and that. This season, the Los Angeles Clippers were supposed to be “Lob City” after they acquired Chris Paul from the New Orleans Hornets for Eric Gordon and magic beans. Instead, they’re now widely known as “Flop City” because Blake Griffin has become public flopping enemy No. 1. As a result of widespread accusations, Stern once again says the NBA will pay more attention to flopping.

Hold on, my pet birds would like to respond:

(Video via)

Always relevant.

From the San Francisco Chronicle:

“I’m here for Carson, to help him with reads, to let him know that certain things are very good, just to stay on it,” Leinart said in a conference call. “Because when you’re taught a new offense, there’s things that you’re not used to; you’re used to doing it a certain way.”

The Oakland Raiders signed Matt Leinart to apparently help Carson Palmer learn new offensive coordinator Greg Knapp’s system since Leinart was the backup for the Houston Texans, Knapp’s previous team, last season. Leinart believes that his knowledge can help Palmer understand routes better. “If not,” said Leinart, “we’ll just go slay some vag, duders.”

When rumor broke that former Los Angeles Lakers coach Phil Jackson was “feeling the itch” to get back in the game, people responded with the obvious: “Well, he’ll coach the New York Knicks.” Because Jackson loves situations in which he has to use his Zen-like abilities to calm egos. But then I also started seeing whispers that he’d be an option for the Orlando Magic and I just laughed and laughed. Because hell would host the Winter Olympics first.

(GIF via Jose 3030)

The Los Angeles Lakers are overmatched by the youth and energy of the Oklahoma City Thunder, as evidenced by the 119-90 drubbing they suffered last night. For Lakers fans, that sucks. For everyone else, that’s awesome because it means that Kobe Bryant will keep telling us how he really feels.

(Video via)

In news I totally forgot about, the MLB2K12 Perfect Game Challenge took place last week at the MLB Fan Cave, where Christopher Gilmore of Florida won the $1 million prize for winning the Perfect Game Challenge. With Leather Celebrity Fan of the Year Kate Upton was on hand to present Gilmore with his prize, and I can only assume he went home and gave everyone he knows the finger.

(Image via)

New York Rangers coach John Tortorella hates press conferences and that’s great news for us, because the Internet knows just what to do with videos of people being dicks for no good reason.

I’ve watched this video at least 60 times. Thunder Dan’s face is priceless.

I had no clue that people were still watching Dancing with the Stars, because after a while I would think that watching people who suck at dancing dance would get really old. I guess not, because Green Bay Packers receiver Donald Driver brought out the big guns last night for his semi final round performance. On hand to cheer him on were Aaron Rodgers, Clay Matthews and Mike McCarthy. I’m betting that Rodgers just walked around in the dancers area after the show and handed out slips of paper with his phone number on it, because that’s what Aaron Rodgers does, damn it.

I have nothing to say about Denver Nuggets center JaVale McGee getting a platypus other than I want a f*cking pet platypus. And yes, I know they’re poisonous, but that’s what makes them such great conversation starters.

And now, my longshot prediction of the week. Hold on to this one, folks, because I’m seriously going to stand by it.

Chicago Bears quarterback Jay Cutler says that his injured thumb – that caused the Bears to collapse and fall completely out of the playoff picture last season – is now 100% fine.

“It’s fine,” he said Monday. “I really didn’t throw a lot in the offseason, rehabbed a little bit and came back and felt good.” (Via NECN)

And with a kid on the way and his bestest receiver bud Brandon Marshall on the roster, I’m just getting this feeling that this is the season that J-Cutty is going to silence all of his critics. Or he won’t. Whatever, bros, this psychic thing ain’t perfect.

Indiana Pacers forward Tyler Hansbrough is the prototypical love him or hate him player. He’s energetic, intense and borderline obnoxious on the court, so fans of the team he plays for love him and those he plays against hate him. In the Pacers’ first round series against the Orlando Magic alone, he showed that even though his numbers are low coming off the bench, he contributes best by getting into opponents’ heads and causing them to make mistakes.

I’m also the perfect example of a basketball fan who typically hates Hansbrough, because I find his intensity more arrogant than infectious. But during this first round series, in which his Pacers defeated the Magic 4 games to 1, I learned to respect him more than I ever have. Originally, I thought that Hansbrough was just a mouth-breathing dolt, grunting and derping his way through games and awkwardly lunging for undeserved chest bumps and high fives.

I’ve now learned, though, that there’s so much more emotional and intellectual depth to this athletic warrior and I want to pay tribute to Hansbrough in order to once and for all crush the misconception that he’s anything but a winner.

(Banner via)

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Wait, we can do better than that…

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And I was even able to dig up some childhood photos that show us just how deep and emotionally advanced Hansbrough was growing up.

The Orlando Magic and Indiana Pacers have one of the more understated and heated rivalries building in the NBA, but nobody really talks about it because it’s the Magic and the Pacers. Yawwwwwwwwn, amiright? Speaking of yawns, Danny Granger and a few of his Pacers teammates are probably a little tired this morning since they were out partying in Orlando until 2:45 a.m. Big deal, because I’ll bet Chris Duhon is still out drinking right now.

But it is a bit of a big deal, because while leaving Club 23, Pacers backup center Kyrylo Kesenko was confronted by some Orlando “fans” – and I use quotes because at 2:45 a.m. they’re really just random assh*les looking for a fight – and one even pushed the 7-footer. Then all heck broke loose. Heck, I say!

More from TMZ, “As Kyrylo tried to walk away from the situation … the mob grew in numbers and the taunts became louder.

That’s when Kyrylo’s teammate Danny Granger charged towards the clubgoer … only to be restrained by some of his friends.” (Via TMZ and their ridiculous love for ellipses.)

I’ve included the poor quality cell phone cam video of the altercation after the jump, and I think TMZ is making Granger out to be a bit more badass than he actually he is. Either way, I’m not one to preach about grown men knowing better than to go out partying, but if you’re as recognizable as Granger or, better yet, you’re a 7-foot European dude, people are probably going to talk sh*t.

I know I would. But from like two blocks away, because I’m not stupid.

(Banner via the AP; H/T to my buddy Brian at Magic Basketball Online)

The majority of the national media picked the Indiana Pacers to beat the Orlando Magic in 4 games, and the Florida sports media is so convinced that the Magic are going to lose quickly that they just stuck to making up news about Dwight Howard instead of predicting the series outcome. But on Saturday night, the Magic had other ideas, as they defeated the Indiana Pacers 81-77 in the first game of their incredibly boring first round matchup.

The Magic went on an 11-0 run to close out the game, and the victory was sealed when Indiana’s Danny Granger traveled with less than 8 seconds left and down by just 3. And all the way at the end of the Magic bench, Chris Duhon, of all people, turned Granger’s one stupid play into the weekend’s best sports meme not involving Dontari Poe trying to make out with Roger Goodell.

So of course the crafty minds of the Interwebs took some musical liberties with the original video of Duhon’s travel dance. And if they get in trouble for using unlicensed music, maybe Duhon can help them out with the bills with his $3.5 million salary.

First, it’s the obligatory Soulja Boy remix, because after working so hard to get Soulja Boy out of our lives, we just made him relevant again.

And here’s the really annoying squeaky voice song.

I probably would have gone with the Bushwhackers theme music, because they were the greatest tag team in WWF history.

Earlier this month, Orlando’s Local 6 Sports Director David “Ping” Pingalore reported that Dwight Howard told Orlando Magic management that he wanted coach Stan Van Gundy fired. This story “broke” on April 4, and it led to one of the most amazingly awkward interviews in NBA history, when Van Gundy told reporters point blank that he knew Howard tried to have him fired, and then Howard interrupted the interview and put his arm around Van Gundy, completely oblivious to what just happened. Howard’s reaction when the reporters filled him looked a little like this:

The problem with Ping’s report was that it wasn’t anything new. Magic writers like Jarrod Rudolph had reported months ago that Howard wanted Van Gundy out, but it went unnoticed because it hadn’t been preceded by two months of trade deadline drama. Ping’s “sources” – which we’ll discuss in a moment – and their #HOTTGOSS were more timely and convenient for the NBA media that needed something to fill the downtime between the trade deadline and the playoffs. So Ping was heralded for this so-called scoop, and he was given a free pass for his next aimless, unsubstantiated breaking story.

That story, of course, was this week’s report that Howard refused to play for Van Gundy and was faking his herniated disc injury as a protest. Well if that’s true, Howard is the most committed liar since George Costanza, because he is having season-ending surgery that will require four months of recovery.

Dan Fegan, Howard’s agent, said he hopes this development debunks any thoughts that Howard’s back problem was not serious and that he was utilizing it as an excuse not to play.

“Dwight has never laid down once in his entire career,” Fegan said. “It’s absurd that some publicly, and others privately, speculated that Dwight was laying down or quitting. In fact, he was working his hardest to play through an injury which now requires surgery.” (Via ESPN)

I’ll give the media a little credit, because even though sports sites like ESPN and CBS Sports instantly embraced Ping’s latest story, they were also quick to shoot it down with contrarian sources. But what nobody ever reported was that this Ping guy has one hell of a terrible track record of reporting. This season alone, Ping guaranteed that Howard was going to be traded to the Nets and Lakers, and he also guaranteed that Chris Paul was being traded to the Magic.

Hell, he once practically declared Urban Meyer dead when he was the head coach at Florida, and he reported that the Big East was inviting UCF and Memphis a year before it actually happened. Basically, this guy throws a lot of crap at walls, and some of it sticks because of technicalities. All of the crap, though, is juicy enough that it’s attractive to major media outlets and the guys on Around the Horn don’t care if it’s true, because they just need something to shout about.

The point of all of this is that in this short season, Howard has gone from lovable man-child to vilified crybaby, and he owes a lot of that to Ping’s malicious reporting. But I think he owes more to his inability to be honest, as proven by that video of Van Gundy stabbing back. We already know that the media is full of vindictive assholes trying to make names for themselves, but a lot of us still expect athletes to step up and defend themselves by just being honest. Howard’s behavior throughout this season has been so terrible that we actually believe anything that is reported about him now.

For some reason, Howard hasn’t stepped forward to lay it all out and defend himself. He’s lied repeatedly and tried to use his jovial antics as a distraction while pulling a moving truck up to his house. And of course this remarkably dramatic season – which is unparalleled – ended in the only fitting way, with Howard being unable to even fight for the Magic’s longshot return to the NBA Finals.

Before, during and after “The Decision”, as I and many others were painting Lebron James as the ultimate sports villain for turning his back on the city that raised and worshipped him, a commenter forewarned me that I better give Howard this same attention when he leaves the Magic. I stuck by Howard, though, and said that he’d probably leave, but he’d do it right. My prediction was as wrong as one of Ping’s stories.

Someone asked me on Twitter yesterday if Howard is now worse than James. The jury is still out, because Howard hasn’t left the Magic yet. He will. I am convinced a million times over that he’s checked out and ready to join Deron Williams in Dallas next year via trade. Once he is gone, barring one of the most miraculous PR campaigns in sports history, Howard will be worse than James.

James dug his hole because of one hour, while Dwight has dug a canyon over a season, and he has proven that even Superman can be the bad guy.

(My apologies to those of you who have complained about my Orlando Magic rants in the past, but if you don’t think this has been an uncannily noteworthy story this season, then we just have to agree to disagree.)

"See? Forks are much nicer than pointy sticks."

The NBA trade deadline has passed (kind of) with no blockbusters as sort of expected, depending on which side of the Dwight Howard fence you were sitting. But Howard ended up finally signing his ETO to play for the Orlando Magic through next season (hooray for 365 more days of speculation) which means that most other teams just went business as usual, including Howard’s biggest suitor – the New Jersey Nets.

Leading up to Howard’s decision *groan* it was rumored that the Nets were possibly willing to sweeten their deal for the game’s best center by including MarShon Brooks, two draft picks and even Kris Humphries, if the former Mr. Kardashian would be willing to waive his no-trade clause. And I almost missed his outstanding remark about being traded, but thankfully my favorite Klingon tipster didn’t.

“Would you jump off a bridge?” Humphries asked reporters who inquired about his willingness to waive the no-trade. “It depends how high the water is (or) if there was a drowning baby in the water. I mean, because you (might) jump off in the summer, if it was warm out, (and) you know the water was deep underneath.

“It’s all circumstantial, is the point I’m trying to make,” he said. (Via the New Jersey Star-Ledger)

I’m really glad he pointed out that he was trying to make a point, because I would have had no idea what the f*ck he was talking about. At least it’s nice to know that he’d consider jumping off a bridge to save a drowning baby if it was warm enough outside and the water was deep enough. Because, seriously, I’m sick and tired of babies that drown in shallow water and put my body at risk. That’s just selfish.

In related news, Humphries’ ex, Kim Kardashian, is suing a Mexican plastic surgeon for using an image of her in a bikini on a billboard that is currently posted near the California/Mexico border.

(Via the Daily Mail)

While I can understand that she’s upset about someone using her likeness, I think her time is better spent finding a trophy big enough to properly reward the graphic artists who finished this new image of Kim and her sisters…

In case you missed it last night, Dwight Howard had one of the more remarkable games in his career as the Orlando Magic had their most remarkable win of the season. The Magic overcame a 14-point halftime deficit that was the result of a 20-0 Miami Heat run in the second quarter to defeat their in-state rivals 104-98 in overtime. Howard posted 24 points and 25 rebounds to lead his band of merry just-not-good-enoughers to their third straight win. And that’s where the fun ends.

During last night’s game, a Dwight Howard New Jersey Nets shirt (above) was briefly available on NBA.com, and after the game, ESPN had a very peculiar description for Howard’s effort and the importance of that game.

Howard is currently with the Magic in San Antonio, so if it was his Orlando finale, the Magic are getting as much mileage out of him as possible. Leading up to last night’s game, the Twitters were alive with the sounds of rumors that the Magic were part of a threeway deal with the Milwaukee Bucks and Golden State Warriors that would land them Monta Ellis, one of Howard’s preferred additions, but that was shot to poop when the Bucks and Warriors kicked the Magic out of bed and just had themselves a two-way.

Meanwhile, Howard was asked after his team’s win if he wants to be traded before tomorrow’s deadline and his response was: “I told the team I want to stay and finish the season.” He also said that the Magic could then roll the dice on him in the offseason, to which LeBron James responded, “Yo Cleveland, check out this assh*le!”

(H/T to my homeboy at Magic Basketball Online.)